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THE YEAR'S BEST HEADLINES OF 2007:
(Yes, they were really printed as seen here.)


<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says</span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>No, really?</span>



<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers </span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>Now that's taking things a bit far!</span>

<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over </span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>
What a guy!</span>



<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Miners Refuse to Work after Death</span>

<span style='font-size: 11pt'>No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!</span>

<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant </span>

<span style='font-size: 11pt'>See if that works any better than a fair trial!</span>

<span style='font-size: 17pt'>War Dims Hope for Peace </span>

<span style='font-size: 11pt'>I can see where it might have that effect!</span>

<span style='font-size: 17pt'>If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile</span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>Ya think?!</span>


<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures </span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>Who would have thought!</span>

<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain;PoliceSuspect Homicide </span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>They may be on to something!</span>

<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges </span>

<span style='font-size: 11pt'>You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?! </span>


<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Man Struck By Lightning:Faces Battery Charge </span>

<span style='font-size: 11pt'>He probably IS the battery charge</span>


<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft </span>

<span style='font-size: 11pt'>That's what he gets for eating those beans!</span>

<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Kids Make Nutritious Snacks </span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>Do they taste like chicken?</span>



<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Local High School DropoutsCut in Half </span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>Chainsaw Massacre all over again!</span>


<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors </span>

<span style='font-size: 11pt'>Boy, are they tall!</span>


And the winner is...

<span style='font-size: 17pt'>Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead </span>
<span style='font-size: 11pt'>Did I read that right?</span>
 
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