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our 4 month old (Groot) has developed some sort of fixation for my wife. We've only had him for about a month and a half and during the last 3 weeks or so, he has developed some sort of bond with my wife that is getting to the point of annoyance.
I work from home so I am with him almost 24/7 where as my wife is away from home working 8-10 hours each day. We are great together during the day but when my wife gets home, he attaches himself to her and will not let her out of his sight to the point of getting under her feet at times. She can't take 2 steps away from him without him having to be where ever she is. Only once in a while during the hours she is home will he be ok with her being out of sight and that doesn't last very long until he goes looking for her.
During the day, several times a day I am able to play with him and spend time working on commands. Is this a temporary thing or do you think he will grow out of it over time. Also, he has a habit of play biting her almost constantly. Not so much with me but sometimes. She is having to correct him almost constantly.
any ideas are welcome.
--Scott
 

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Do you take him on fun walks and outdoor adventures?
 

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Discussion Starter #3 (Edited)
Not sure what that has to do with the attachment to my wife but yes.
We train with trainer once a week as well. We are both a part of his learning.
He currently gets very over stimulated when introduced to new dogs, but that is going to be addressed in training.
 

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Not sure what that has to do with the attachment to my wife but yes.
We train with trainer once a week as well. We are both a part of his learning.
He currently gets very over stimulated when introduced to new dogs, but that is going to be addressed in training.
It's about building a bond with your dog. If hes not interested in you, only in her, maybe you need to be more interesting
 

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'I work from home so I am with him almost 24/7 where as my wife is away from home working 8-10 hours each day.'

I'm just guessing, but I think your pup considers your wife the new high end stiletto and you are the comfortable docksider. With her leaving everyday, the homecoming is exciting. You, well, you're always there.

I would crate him in another room for a few hours while I worked, tend to his bathroom needs and back to the crate until work is done. Then take him out for a rowdy game of ball and a little training. He'll learn to appreciate your attention more. I won't guarantee that he won't fawn all over your wife when she gets home, but he will likely show more appreciation for you.
 

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Agree that the pup needs time out every day....otherwise you create a dog who could end up with separation anxiety. I have a young pup right now who SCREAMS anytime she is left in a crate in a room alone, even to sleep....she HAS to be in the same room as me....she is quiet in the crate in my truck, and ends up fine when I am out of the house too...I am able to take her to work with me, but still leave her home in a crate or kennel a few days a week just so she does NOT get too dependent on me....

He should be crated part of the time your wife is home...he needs to understand being with you (collectively) is a privilege...feed in crate, give a bone and leave him alone for several hours each day and evening.

Lee
 

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It is not uncommon for a GSD to have a favorite person - even from a young age. Some here deny it, but in my experience, my female shepherds have idolized my husband. I do everything for the dogs. In spite of that, the girls worship the ground my husband walks on. I actually find it amusing and am not bothered by it. My husband eats it up. lol!
 

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Discussion Starter #9
I appreciate what you're saying but crating is not an option. We've tried several times to no avail. He goes into hysterics if left in the crate for more than a couple of mins without sight of either one of us. The last time we tried it at night and he was inconsolable for just over 3 hrs we let it go and he never gave up the hysterical yelping. The only time he was quiet was when he decided to chew up his crate pad for just over a minute at a time. The first few nights of crate training went pretty well but the last time was just ridiculous. It's almost as if something was terrorizing him the last night we tried. Now the only time he goes to crate is when we both have to leave and can't take him with us and it's never more than 2 hrs at a time. This has stumped his trainer as well.
He's a great pup otherwise and learns really quickly just not on these 2 subjects and only with my wife. Oh! I forgot to mention that whenever my wife and I show any affection to one another (hugs, Kisses, arm around each other) he seems jealous and physically separates us. It was funny at first, but it's getting annoying as well.

During the day he naps a lot until I am off work around 2pm especially after breakfast and during the heat of the day. After work is when he is able to get most of his exercise and training. He has many toy options and a giant KONG that he plays with and he keeps busy. But when she gets home all bets are off.

We absolutely LOVE this dog and will never give him up it's just these little things that somehow got out of hand.
 

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Discussion Starter #10
I am not bothered by it either and think it is funny to a point. It's when my wife get's upset is when I get concerned and wonder what we could be doing collectively that might cause this.
 

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You mis-understand cloudpump . Our dog loves us both and has bonded with me and her very well. It's as if he respects me but not my wife. He comes and greets me tail a wagging whenever I leave and come home so might I suggest that you re-think what you imply in your responses rather than be condescending. Maybe I should be more interesting...Really? That's your advice?
 

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You are going to have to be no nonsense serious but calm about him not wanting you two to hug, etc. Crating with you two in the same room is calm? Good place to start. then leave the room for 2 minutes. If he starts pitching a fit to be let out, sit quietly in front of the crate. Soon as he stops long enough to take a breath, praise and let him out. And you can play crate games so it becomes more than containment. Maybe he sees it as punishment.
https://susangarrettdogagility.com/2011/01/crate-games-and-the-question-of-value/
 

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I appreciate what you're saying but crating is not an option. We've tried several times to no avail. He goes into hysterics if left in the crate for more than a couple of mins without sight of either one of us. The last time we tried it at night and he was inconsolable for just over 3 hrs we let it go and he never gave up the hysterical yelping. The only time he was quiet was when he decided to chew up his crate pad for just over a minute at a time. The first few nights of crate training went pretty well but the last time was just ridiculous. It's almost as if something was terrorizing him the last night we tried. Now the only time he goes to crate is when we both have to leave and can't take him with us and it's never more than 2 hrs at a time. This has stumped his trainer as well.
He's a great pup otherwise and learns really quickly just not on these 2 subjects and only with my wife. Oh! I forgot to mention that whenever my wife and I show any affection to one another (hugs, Kisses, arm around each other) he seems jealous and physically separates us. It was funny at first, but it's getting annoying as well.

During the day he naps a lot until I am off work around 2pm especially after breakfast and during the heat of the day. After work is when he is able to get most of his exercise and training. He has many toy options and a giant KONG that he plays with and he keeps busy. But when she gets home all bets are off.

We absolutely LOVE this dog and will never give him up it's just these little things that somehow got out of hand.
Several times isn't enough. I think mine took several weeks. You don't want this behavior to go into adulthood. Teach him to get over it while he is little. Plenty of them get hysterical. He will get over it if you stick to your guns
 

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Crate training is kind of essential. If he has to be kenneled at the vet's or for boarding, he will be beyond stressed with the crating on top of the stress of being displaced.

If he chews up his crate mats, don't give him one until he can be content in the crate. Kongs and marrow bones, stuffed and frozen will occupy him for a good bit. If feasible, have a crate in your bedroom and have him sleep in it at night after a good workout.

You don't want the dog training you, but he's learning pretty well what to do to get his way. You'll have a monster on your hands by adolescence.

Maybe your wife can give 15 mins when she gets home from work to throw a ball for him, get him a bit tired and he'll be a little less needy of her. I actually really like a flirt pole, but read that younger dogs should not be jumping and twisting the way this pole makes them do. Hope a pro here can clarify. If you can use one, by all means do, my boy loves it and in no time is worn out.

Just spitballin' here.
 

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From reading your posts and other's, I would have to agree: you need to step up your game when it comes to crate training. It's an essential basic training that would be beneficial for all humans and the dogs. It took me 1-2 months until mine finally LOVES his crate (brought him home when he was 7 1/2 weeks). In those 2 months, he'd cry, whine, pace back and forth. At that time I was living in a studio apartment with a balcony attached to the neighbour's balcony and his crate is in the balcony. One time I was listening to music with a headphone in the kitchen after a gym session, it took me a while till I realised he was crying and barking like crazy, that when I came out to the balcony, my 2 neighbours were at the balcony checking what was going on. I had to explain to them that he was a 3 months old puppy in the process of crate training.

The rewards of crate training is tremendous. Whenever I have company and the room is full of energy, I now have the 'crate!' command and he'll go there on command. When I have guests over for dinner, I just put him in the crate. You don't want him to grow to have separation anxiety, that's why crate training is very important. Essentially what I did was ignore, ignore, ignore, ignore. When he's quiet and relaxed, I let him out. Repeat. I also throw in my worn tshirt during the night, which calmed him down a lot. Whenever he wants his alone time, he goes to his crate (I keep it open) and just chills/sleeps there. Yours have to learn that the crate is a safe place for HIM to unwind.
 

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You mis-understand cloudpump . Our dog loves us both and has bonded with me and her very well. It's as if he respects me but not my wife. He comes and greets me tail a wagging whenever I leave and come home so might I suggest that you re-think what you imply in your responses rather than be condescending. Maybe I should be more interesting...Really? That's your advice?
Well, if you felt it was condescending, that's on you.
I can tell you that my dogs will stay with me if my gf gets up and leaves the room. They know fun things come from me. They will greet her, they respect her (and my daughter). Its all about building.
It honestly sounds like hes bored. Get rid of the toys, focus on engagement. Look up the collared scholar. Read some of her articles. I'd also look at the trainer you are utilizing. You both can give commands, but it sounds as if one of you need to take the reins and run the show.
Hope you dont take offense to that :wink2:
 

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So here is another serious question: Crates as they are now have only been around for maybe the last 20 or so years. What did everyone here do when crates were not so readily available? He has free roam of your house as it should be. Putting him in a crate just because it's convenient is not something I am willing to do. While I'm working he can do whatever he pleases as long as it's not destructive. It hasn't been and when it was early on, he was corrected. Now that its not an issue, he has earned the right to be a free-roaming pet. While I'm working, he comes to me whenever he wants and lets me know he needs some sort of attention whether it be to go outside to potty or just because he want's some affection. Every time we go outside, he gets his potty done and gets a little playtime each and every time. While I'm working, he either keeps himself busy with his toys or naps, or eats/drinks. After my work is done, he gets much more attention from me until my wife gets home and then he gets plenty of attention from both of us. Crate training is NOT the be all to end all solutions. We tried it for a couple of weeks and it didn't work out and we started thinking, why are we even doing this? It doesn't bother me that he likes to sleep in our room. Heck, there are times when I come out of my office to go to the bathroom or make my lunch, get coffee etc. and he's sleeping in the crate. He does not have an aversion to the crate unless we are out of his sight. I wake up at 4am to work. When I go to bed each night @ 10pm, him yowling for 3 hours is not an option. Each night we tried it only got worse not better and we were consistent. So let me emphasize that there is absolutely no reason for him to be crated unless we need to both leave the house. He does not need time-outs during the day. There are plenty of times where he is in another room where he can't see me and does just fine. What does crate training have to do with the problem at hand of him smothering my wife? I've been alive now for 49 years and have NEVER felt the need to crate train a dog. You all seem to suggest it for everything and it's complete BS. This dog is part of our family not a sometime plaything for us to be kept in a crate when it's not convenient. This is not my first dog and not my first GS... It is however the first dog we've had that seems to have this issue with my wife. Can we please stay on topic? Or someone please explain in great detail how crate training is going to help this situation.
 

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Every time you argue against a suggestion offering, you show us you aren’t interested in doing whatever it takes to change your dogs behavior before it becomes ingrained. He is 4 months old, still a baby. You are in charge. So what if he whines a little? He knows he will get his way if he keeps it up. He must be crate trained and he must learn to be alone. There are no quick fixes and snippy responses aren’t going to get you where you want to be.

Crate training needs to be fun. The crate should be a place he loves and wants to go in. I use a huge one during the day for puppies with toys and chews. I put the puppy in and then walk in and out of the room a hundred times, a few seconds at a time. He will quickly realize you always come back if he’s quiet. Ignore him, don’t talk. Don’t react, don’t look at him. Even a look reinforces whining. If he is quiet, after about 100 times, let him out. If he is whining keep walking in and out until he is quiet. Once he is quiet when you leave him for a few seconds, up the time he is alone to 10 seconds, then 20, then 30, then a minute, then 5 minutes. This can take hours, several times a day. It sounds like a huge imposition, but it works. I have crate trained every puppy this way and mine never whine unless they have to pee. As they get older, they earn time uncrated during the day.
 

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It is not uncommon for a GSD to have a favorite person - even from a young age. Some here deny it, but in my experience, my female shepherds have idolized my husband. I do everything for the dogs. In spite of that, the girls worship the ground my husband walks on. I actually find it amusing and am not bothered by it. My husband eats it up. lol!
I'm in the same boat your husbands in lol. My wife gets jealous sometimes. I tell her to dont hate lol. In fact, Mei followed me upstairs just now and is chillin on the bed while I take care of business in the bathroom. When I'm done, she'll follow me right back downstairs lol!
 
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