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Discussion Starter #1
Ok I have almost had Patty for 2 years now. I rescued her when she was four. Some of you may remember the time I was looking for a dog.

Well I got the perfect dog. Shes a velcroe dog that never leaves my side. I am 24 years old still living at the parents house. But only because I take care of there house while they live in Florida 9 months of year. Anyways...

Patty loves mostly everyone once she warms up to you. She loves my Dad and my neighbors. Patty is with my Mom a lot of the time, but has never trusted her.

She never takes her eye off Mom and you can just tell she is frighten by her. This shouldnt be happening for the amount of time my Mom is with Patty.

My mom loves patty to death and does everythign in her power to get her to like her. She spoils her with treats takes her for walks, pets her and everything. But still Patty will not budge she is always just like "not sure mode" with my Mom.

Any advice. It just doesnt make sense she loved me from day 1, loves my step dad who is very experienced with GSD hsi whole life, loves my friends, family members, but with Mom she would prefer just to stay away. I DONT GET IT

HELP! haha
 

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Sounds like someone didn't treat her kindly -before you got her and that someone has some similarity to your Mom.

Have you tried letting your Mom be the one to feed her? The only one to feed her for a while?
 

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Dogs can be just like people and just NOT like someone for no apparent reason. And nothing you do will change their mind. Wrangler doesn't like my sister. He never has and I would be willing to bet he never will. And she is the ONY person he has ever met that he doesn't like.

Your mom pushing herself on her probably doesn't help either.
 

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Smell may have something to do with it. People who smoke, wear a certain perfume, use a certain soap, antiperspirant, eats a certain spice or drinks the same juice every morning. Maybe Patty wasn't even abused, but just knew someone (or was in a situation, like she passed a restaurant once) that made her nervous, and Mom just kind of smells like that.

It's odd, but not insurmountable. I had a rescue like this. It took about two months to completely resolve the matter.

Feeding her meals is a good start. Make sure Patty is good and hungry. Have Mom sit on the floor and feed Patty by hand. Mom and Patty should have a nice conversation throughout the whole meal. Lighthearted, lots of laughter, "oh look! There's a piece of cheese in your kibble! Wow, You never get that with Martin, do you?" Eat kibble a while longer... "OMG! A piece of hotdog too?"

Pretty soon, Patty will be looking forward to meals with Mom.

Walks are nice. But let's ratchet it up a bunch. Where does Patty REALLY like to go? The park? The lake? The butcher shop? The ice cream shop and share a bit of vanilla ice cream? THAT is where Mom should be taking her. When Mom comes over, Patty gets to go to phenomenal places. Mom brings high value snacks (check out the thread on the BARF forum for discussion about these), and they have a wonderful time.

Mom should not be forcing affection (petting, training, etc). Just take her out, feed her snacks for good behavior, and they have a nice time. YOU meanwhile fade into the background for a while, take her on her normal walks, feed her normal snacks, do the normal boring stuff.

Mom is, in essence, the "Disneyland" parent. You're just the guy that she lives with. Pretty soon, she will adore Mom.


Yeah, she'll still like you all right.
 

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It may not even be related to a previous experience. My parent's dog could care less about my sister. She calls him and he ignores her. She can have treats or anything with her but he doesn't care. He loves everyone else. He even stayed with my sister for a few months. Luckily, he loves her kids so he listened to them. He just ignores my sister. I think dogs are like people. They may have their own reason for not liking someone. I wish they could vocalize it though!
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Wow all very interesting and I will take this to my heart. Mom says she does all right with her with I am not home and at work and my dad is gone. But once one of us comes home Patty has the look out.

Mom does force herself onto her. Trying to tell her what to do and stuff like that.

Patty is very very very smart. Probably the smartest dog I have ever been apart of, but she only will listen to me at ALL times, others only when there is something to be given to her.

Sometimes my mom teases her and says "I'm going to get you" Patty backs up and gives three deep barks lol and warns her. Its funny at the time but I don't think its funny to Patty and not that I think patty would ever harm a bug, I am afraid one time she will give MOm a frieght bite.
 

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Originally Posted By: MartinSometimes my mom teases her and says "I'm going to get you" Patty backs up and gives three deep barks lol and warns her. Its funny at the time but I don't think its funny to Patty and not that I think patty would ever harm a bug, I am afraid one time she will give MOm a frieght bite.


No wonder Patty doesn't like her! No offense, but your mom needs to GROW UP and stop teasing the dog! And when the dog bites your mom, it will be the dog that gets the blame, even thogh your mom brought it on herself!
 

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Originally Posted By: BlackGSD
Originally Posted By: MartinSometimes my mom teases her and says "I'm going to get you" Patty backs up and gives three deep barks lol and warns her. Its funny at the time but I don't think its funny to Patty and not that I think patty would ever harm a bug, I am afraid one time she will give MOm a frieght bite.


No wonder Patty doesn't like her! No offense, but your mom needs to GROW UP and stop teasing the dog! And when the dog bites your mom, it will be the dog that gets the blame, even thogh your mom brought it on herself!
What Tracy said.

We can't counter-condition (training OUT a fear response and training IN a positive response) when conditioning (creating the fear response) is still going on. Tell Mom to leave Patty alone, completely alone. Like, the dog doesn't exist. Give it several months -- like 6 months. THEN try. Gently. And if Patty resists at all, then give up. Mom blew it. Some dogs are forgiving. Some aren't. That's how it goes.

Forget everything I said above for now. Print it up and file it. Don't even waste your time in the interim. Patty needs time to just "be." Six months minimum.

Or things may get worse.
 

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Quote:Sometimes my mom teases her and says "I'm going to get you" Patty backs up and gives three deep barks lol and warns her. Its funny at the time but I don't think its funny to Patty and not that I think patty would ever harm a bug, I am afraid one time she will give MOm a frieght bite.
The first thing I teach children - about dogs - is never, ever, tease a dog!

<u>It's cruel!</u>

If Patty did bite your Mom, it would be your Mom's fault, but a liability to you and your family. You're Mom is setting Patty up to fail.

Somehow, someway, you need to get through to your Mom on this.

All dogs can and will bite if taken to the edge (and it sounds like your Mom is pushing it).
 

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Gosh Martin I had no idea you guys were having a problem!!! If I remember Patty was adopted by you from a lady who was terminally ill (bless you!!) I do not think Patty was abused.

Your mom teasing Patty even in fun may not be fun to Patty. Maybe mom can do some small things with Patty like sit to greet, sit for petting etc. Could it be Patty has your number too and is working you?

If she and mom do fine when you are gone I might look at that as a possibility. Maybe Patty is trying to get more of your attention.

And as another poster said, maybe she just does not like your mom. Like people, I am sure dogs run into folk they just do not like.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
ok once again...like always on this board people take things out of context.....its not teasing as i do this with patty and its our way of saying hey lets play.... mom does the same thing as i. and its not like it happens all the time. anyways no need to defend and no need to have a response from anyone


if anyone knows my dog its me....i personally think patty just doesnt like her because she yells and screams at a 24 year olds room being messy...so maybe i need to grow up...as for my mom she is 70 years old and as wise and grown up as they come...so when you said no offense...i took offense....patty tolerates my mom just doesnt consider her "family"

when it comes to my own dog i give up with advice from this board

kathy you have always been great to me and my response has nothing at all to do with you...for that being said and being around the board for # of years now...i know whos post to trust...enough said
 

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This is one of MY RESCUES....She is not a fear biter nor has aggressive issues. Like KathyW said some dogs just do not like, nor prefer to be around some people..I know this dog's backgroound and she was NEVER abused but rather adored. Her owner was dying of cancer and asked me to find her a perfect home ( which I might add I have done ) Marty is like a son to me. His family is wonderful and would never taunt her in a way to make her bite. Patty was very particular who she made up with while here at the GSD Rescue. She was so confused when she was forced to leave her home. I was the only one in my house she would allow to actually touch her. My daughter and husband had to competely ignore her for her to even pop her head out of cover. Dogs with baggage sometimes NEVER can trust 100%. Well known fact for some of you on the board who have not dealt with a rescue dog. You just have to pray like heck that the family can deal with it and Marty's family has. I would not hesitate to re-adopt to Marty again.
Patty happens to be one of those " one person GSD's " The kind who think no other person exsists or matters but her owner. Very bondy.
So just to lay any doubts about Marty and his family to rest.....
 

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Originally Posted By: Martinok once again...like always on this board people take things out of context.....its not teasing as i do this with patty and its our way of saying hey lets play.... mom does the same thing as i. and its not like it happens all the time. anyways no need to defend and no need to have a response from anyone

<span style="color: #FF0000"> Lets not forget, YOU are the one that said your mom "teases" the dog. You did NOT say this is a "game" and something that YOU also do.</span>


if anyone knows my dog its me....i personally think patty just doesnt like her because she yells and screams at a 24 year olds room being messy...so maybe i need to grow up...as for my mom she is 70 years old and as wise and grown up as they come...so when you said no offense...i took offense....patty tolerates my mom just doesnt consider her "family"

<span style="color: #FF0000">And as such. YOU playing this "game" with Patty is one thing, but your mom doing it is another. YOU are the one that said Patty barks at your mom and you are afraid she will give her a "frieght bite". As I said in the first place, Patty may just NOT like your mom, and "mom" playing the same "game" you do, probably isn't helping. </span>

when it comes to my own dog i give up with advice from this board

<span style="color: #FF0000">Another case of someone getting bent out of shape because they didn't get the answers they wanted to hear.</span>
 

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Melody I remember Martin talking about Patty and being so excited to be able to give her a home. I did not recall him ever saying there was an issue so his post surprised me about his mom.

I have an older rescue too that sometimes runs across someone he does not like. Have no clue why - it just is. I think that is why I said perhaps Patty just did not like his mom.

I also recall Martin describing his family as experienced dog people and they had had GSD's in the past too.

And sometimes we all mis-use words. Teasing a dog sparks a lot of response even if teasing is done as part of a game. I really do not consider teasing as part of game as "teasing" a dog, I consider it a game we both engage in. I would imagine that is the kind of teasing he was referring to as he was offended by some of the replies.
 

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Quote:
Sometimes my <span style="color: #FF0000">mom teases her </span>and says "I'm going to get you" <span style="color: #FF0000">Patty backs up and gives three deep barks lol and warns her.</span> Its funny at the time but <span style="color: #FF0000">I don't think its funny to Patty</span> and not that I think patty would ever harm a bug, <span style="color: #FF0000">I am afraid one time she will give MOm a frieght bite.</span>
Martin - this is what you said and what elicited my response.

If you meant what you said, I stand by my words - "never tease a dog."

We can only respond to your words - no one can read between the lines.
 
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Martin, I'm afraid I have to agree with the others. People can only go by what they see in text. If you describe something in a way that's left open to interpretation (and I can easily see why this was interpreted the way it was) then you have to allow for what you will get as a response.

I'm glad Melody was able to add more detail to this, but do not blame people for replying as they did without that added dimension being known.
 

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My Heidi is very afraid of my dad, which is so sad because he LOVES all dogs. She also doesn't like (or, more likely, is scared of) my brother and my sister's boyfriend. I notice that she seems to be more afraid of men with white hair and/or men with beards. And she's just kind of leery of men in general. It took my husband a long time to win her over, and he's still #2, after me!! I think it has to do with her past. She used to be afraid of my brother-in-law (who has white hair AND a beard!) but with time, patience, and treats, she is much more at ease with him. So you just never know, she may come around to at least being more comfortable with your mom in the future.
 
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