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It's been about 6 months since I had to put Zeus down. Ironically, I adopted Belle 6 months before I adopted Zeus 12 years ago. Belle has been losing weight and recently hasn't wanted to eat at all. I thought she had an upper respiratory infection. Well yesterday I took her to the vet and she told me that Belle has a cancerous tumor in her throat. It's been there for a while. The middle is starting to rott and bleed out a bit. She gave Belle a steriod shot and some liquid antibotics for me to give her twice a day since she can't really swallow anything. For a while she's been having such a hard time eating - coughing her food up, etc... That's because the tumor has closed her trachea a lot and he can't get anything solid down.

The vet didn't think it would be too much longer that she'll be around. She actually said if I wanted to put her down yesterday it wouldn't have been too soon. :-( I will not make any of my dogs suffer but I have to give them a chance - even if it's only for a little while.

When we were at the vet, Belle was panting (from the excitement of being in the car and vets office) and you could hear she was having trouble breathing. It kinda sounded like something was stuck in her throat. The dr asked if she's hyper at home and if she's panting a lot. She's not - she is the calmest dog I have ever known. Even as a puppy...she would just sit there and look at the other puppies like they were crazy! She's my lazy couch potato dog.

So I brought her home yesterday and I went out and brought her chop meat and cooked some up. I pureed her Solid Gold dog food and put some chop meat on top of that and she ate yesterday and TWICE today. She's resting comfortably now. No panting and just laying down being lazy like she always does.

I did try and give her a tinnie tiny piece of bacon this morning and she coughed it up - with blood on it. She can only eat soft food. She did eat some of the eggs but can not eat anything solid. I tried to give her a Burger King chicken nuggest the other day and she wouldn't eat it. Not even a slice of turkey breast or bologna. It has to be pureed and soft like baby food.

I know my time is very short lived with her. I hope she is able to be with us through the Christmas season but I'll never make her suffer - if it's her time...I will make sure she doesn't suffer.

This is the hardest part about being owned by a dog. Letting go...it's so hard! I haven't even been able to take Zeus' name off my signature and put his name with my other Bridge babies and now my Belle will be going very shortly. I know when I wake up everyday I'll be wondering if today is her last day. It's so very sad to listen to the Christmas music, do the Christmas shopping and decorate (Christmas - my favorite time of the year) all when I know what will have to be done very soon. I'm finding it very difficult to do Christmas shopping and looking for a place that cremates animals all at the same time. :-( I have always been nervous that I would never get my actual dogs ashes back, even if I do pay for individual cremation. I thought about being present when they do it. I don't think I can handle that though. It makes me so sad to have all this going through my head while she's laying in her bed and I'm kissing and hugging her. :-(

The vet was suggesting that I should put her down within the week but...if she's eating and drinking and relaxing comfortably ... how can I put her down? She doesn't seem like she's having a hard time breathing. At least not at home. When we were in the vets office yesterday she sounded horrible because she was nervous and panting, etc... But at home she's nice and relaxed.

Sorry - I'm rambling...
 

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I am so sorry to hear about your Belle. It is never easy as you know, but take comfort in knowing that your furkids have had a wonderful life with you. When it was time for our 2nd GSD Aili to go (and she definitely let us know) we had a great last night, fed her treats from the table, loved and snuggled with her all night long. I would say as long as she's comfortable, let her be. I bet she will let you know. Hugs to you.
 

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Thats tough so sorry you are going through this so soon after Zeus's passing. Letting go is always the toughest part. I remember when my Zeus passed I just wished he could be there to chew up one more shoe, eat my couch, pee on the floor, or steal a sock and run off. All the love, companionship, and even destruction is hard to let go of. I hope Belle gets through the holidays with you guys there, but whats most important is that she goes knowing how much she was loved which she will:(
 

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Thinking about and praying for you and Belle!
 

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I am so sorry you're going through this. Prayers for some comfortable extra time with your girl.
 

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What a hard decision for you to make... it's never easy, I know.

I wish you strength and comfort during this time.
 

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Linda I am so sorry you are having to go through this so soon after Zeus. I am keeping you and Belle in my thoughts and prayers :hugs:
 

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I'm very sorry. You're right, it's never easy. Sending puppy-prayers your way.
 

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Linda, I am so very sorry your going and Belle are going thru this:(( Cherish each day, we'll be keeping you in our thoughts and prayers
 

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So sorry you are going through this at this time of year (though no time is ever good for this). You will know when it's time. Enjoy her last bit of time with you. Zeus will be waiting to greet her at the bridge when it's time.
 

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A lot of us know your heartache first hand ... it's a heart wrenching decision ! My last GSD had a tumor on his chest, the vet was able to remove it and thought that he had gotten it all. They wanted to do kemo, but with Max being 12yrs old I had a decision to make. I decided to let nature take it's course. A month or so later I woke up to find his body laying cold on the living room floor. Did I make the right decision ? Did I cause him more suffering by not having him put down ? I still question myself to this day .... :(
 

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I am so sorry to hear about your Belle being so sick. You are in my prayers.
 

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I am so sorry you are going through this. We have all been there too. Enjoy every moment you have with her. She will let you know when it is time. As long as she is comfortable and not hurting I don't see why she can't be home with you. We have in the past with cancer dogs let them spent their last days with us. We always knew when it was time. We let them have canned food, treats anything they wanted in that time. It was very hard but when the actual time came we were prepared for it so it was a little easier to deal with. You have given her a good life and lots of love so take comfort in that.
 

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well it's the hardest of the hard decisions to make. i wish you strength and peace of mind in making it. take care.
 

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I'm so sorry Linda, I know how hard Zeus's loss was for you, I can't even imagine losing both my dogs within a few months of each other. :hugs:

I think as long as she seems comfortable and is interested in food, that's a good sign that it's not her time yet. She'll let you know when she's ready to go.
 

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Linda: I totally agree with you. While Belle is able to handle the puree food and she rests comfortably, just enjoy your time with her. Take lots of pictures. It is just mind blowing to imagine that you are going through this after saying goodbye just 6 months ago to your other beloved dog, so you are in my thoughts and prayers also.
 
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