Training Problem: Anxiety/Panic/Frustration - German Shepherd Dog Forums
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post #1 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 10:03 PM Thread Starter
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Training Problem: Anxiety/Panic/Frustration

Hello All

I have PTSD & BPD, which in short I get anxious, frustrated, and panic quite easily.

I've noticed that while working/training with my dogs (which I spoiled for ages and gave them everything without working for it, now I've learned from my mistakes and I am in pursuit to correct them) I find myself getting all strung up and frustrated quite quickly, and I'm afraid my dogs are picking up on it.

How would you deal with issues like these? My goal is that if I could put my foot down to my dogs, I could stand up to people in everyday life. (Used to be a push over)

Are there any exercises or calming techniques for the trainer you would recommend? And if so is it possible that my dogs would purposely get me all worked up to avoid working and getting what they want?


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post #2 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 10:07 PM
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For starters, keep your training sessions short and walk away if you feel any negative emotions coming on. And manage your expectations; unrealistic expectations lead quite quickly to frustration. I'm sorry, I'm just an average dog owner, so I don't have anything more specific for you.

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post #3 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 11:00 PM
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"exercises or calming techniques for the trainer". You mean to calm you down?

Aside from that, a few people on the forum have recommended NILIF training.

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post #4 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 11:08 PM
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When do you tend to get frustrated? What are your triggers, what are the responses you have that you don't like in those situations, and what do you want to do when they arise? Pinpoint the trouble spots (for you, not for the dogs) and be mindful when you approach them. Have your alternatives planned and prepared.

Dogs aren't going to get you "all worked up" on purpose to avoid having to do stuff, and thinking in those terms may mislead you into blaming them when in fact they are blameless. IMO that is a pitfall to recognize and avoid.

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post #5 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 11:08 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by honeysdad View Post
"exercises or calming techniques for the trainer". You mean to calm you down?

Aside from that, a few people on the forum have recommended NILIF training.

Nothing in Life is Free
Yes, for me. I can't demand for my dogs to be cool, calm, and collected if I can't do it myself during training. So I was hoping that if someone else who's experienced this would have and idea.




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post #6 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 11:09 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by paulag1955 View Post
For starters, keep your training sessions short and walk away if you feel any negative emotions coming on. And manage your expectations; unrealistic expectations lead quite quickly to frustration. I'm sorry, I'm just an average dog owner, so I don't have anything more specific for you.
Don't be sorry, I take everyones advice to heart, even if it's something I don't want to hear but need to. Ok, shorter sessions it is.


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post #7 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 11:23 PM
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I think that "Nothin In Life Is Free" training might be suitable for you. The hardest part would be learning to ignore your dogs' demands, and wondering what affect this might have on your relationship. It's hard to see an otherwise care-free, happy, (but demanding,) dog moping away, seemingly depressed because it's been ignored. I haven't got passed that stage either.
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post #8 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-04-2013, 02:44 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Merciel View Post
When do you tend to get frustrated? What are your triggers, what are the responses you have that you don't like in those situations, and what do you want to do when they arise? Pinpoint the trouble spots (for you, not for the dogs) and be mindful when you approach them. Have your alternatives planned and prepared.

Dogs aren't going to get you "all worked up" on purpose to avoid having to do stuff, and thinking in those terms may mislead you into blaming them when in fact they are blameless. IMO that is a pitfall to recognize and avoid.
Those are some really great points, I didn't even think of it that way. I'm going to go write down the triggers/cycles to see if I can find a pattern.


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post #9 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-04-2013, 02:47 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by honeysdad View Post
I think that "Nothin In Life Is Free" training might be suitable for you. The hardest part would be learning to ignore your dogs' demands, and wondering what affect this might have on your relationship. It's hard to see an otherwise care-free, happy, (but demanding,) dog moping away, seemingly depressed because it's been ignored. I haven't got passed that stage either.
That's the trouble right there, as soon as they whine, bark, moan, STARE for eye contact my chest gets tight. And when they're in public it get's worse especially when they want to greet someone. I just downloaded NILIF last night but did not have the chance to read it yet, but it looks like I got to get right to it.

The biggest frustrating issue I have with them is when they create a scene and I feel guilty/compelled to silence it. When I ignore it gets louder and louder, but if I say 'knock it off' even if I give no eye contact it get's worse and longer the next time. NILIF it is!!!


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post #10 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-04-2013, 01:05 PM Thread Starter
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Oh. My. God.

It works. The NILIF method is totally working on both of my dogs!!! Not going to lie they're not making it easy for me, but I can tell that they're catching onto it!

I see now how they would get what they want in their own little ways, and I even taught Mr. Sage about our little plan and he's finally happy that the dogs are starting to respect him!!!

Yayyyyy!!!!


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