She's getting old--Its breaking my heart--
Im Mary--Misty's Mom. Im new here to the forum. Misty is my 15 year old GS--Will be 16 this November. She was diagnosed definitively with HD around 3, although she showed signs even before a year. She was OFA certified-but Im sure some of you know how that goes...15 years later--she has lived one **** of a life. I have NEVER EVER had a better friend or companion. I've got AMAZING stories about her I could share! I can't remember a time without her. And I can't imagine a day without her. She has become a permanent fixture in my life. Through break-ups, losses of people, health problems, raising kids, losing jobs, she has always been here with me--steadfast--never changing. She is one of the true constants in my life. We have done it all together from hunting trips on snowy hillsides tracking deer to lazy days on sandy beaches. All it takes to please her is me!
So her health story-- She has been on the best of diets, GC, steroid injections, supplements--you name it. However, about two years ago--she started having serious stomach problems. She lost her appetite, vomited, had diarrhea, dark urine-accidents in the house--Everything checked out ok, other than elevated liver enzymes--which I knew was coming from symptoms. So I decided to stop meds. I thought at that point I was coming to the Quality of life decision.
Her appetite came back though and stomach problems disappeared.
Two years off any supplements or meds, and mainly raw diet-I'll admit at her age--She gets what she wants-This winter hit her hard. She was outside walking by the pool and lost her legs out from under her and fell in---This was her favorite place--I immediately jumped in and got her out. I got pneumonia--She was laid up for about 3 weeks- but no acute injuries--Her HD/arthritis is really taken its toll.
Over the last couple of months--Im starting to also maybe suspect some DM. She has cataracts, and loss of hearing--But still had the joy in her eyes--that spirit and fire they have!
This last month, and particularly this last week, she has fallen and struggles more and more. I guess Im just venting and rambling. Im not READY for what seems to have snuck up on me.
My biggest problem is letting her go just because she can't walk, when otherwise her health is ok, and I see she isn't ready in her eyes. Yet, it rips my heart out to see her struggle to get up and drag her legs and fall. We lift her back end up to help her maneuver around. But I don't know who we are helping--her or me. Im sure she has pain--but at her age I think it has been so chronic, she doesn't act like it..
More than anything, I would say a lack of pain or high tolerance of it-has been her worst enemy. She has ALWAYS been an active lady. She is settled to about 3 different places. Beside my bed, beside my computer chair, or under our palm tree in the sand by the pool. She can still get herself up and go out to potty--we help some and she moves from these 3 places as I do.
Im not really asking questions I guess. Like I said just rambling. I had always hoped the end would take me by surprise, or in her sleep. I wasn't prepared to perhaps have to decide when its the end. Im PISSED her legs are quitting on her when her mind is still sharp and her heart still has joy-I can't make the decision to let go when I still see Misty when I look in her eyes. At her age--I refuse any surgery or meds. Her days are mostly sleeping in comfort and sometimes barking at a passerby--She enjoys a ball thrown her way--and cataracts and all she can still catch it even lying down. Her favorite thing to carry around is a piece of 1 1/2 pvc. I've spent the last two days looking at dog wheelchairs and braces online--and ended up here...Im a lost soul right now.....just sharing my story.
GS Misty 15.5 yrs
"Blessed is the person who has earned the love of an old dog."
Last edited by JeanKBBMMMAAN; 04-11-2012 at 12:42 PM.
Reason: I edited in some paragraphs because it's really good info