Stupid question but curious lol - German Shepherd Dog Forums
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post #1 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-01-2019, 03:44 PM Thread Starter
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Stupid question but curious lol

Hi everyone, I have a question about my 9 month old male German Shepherd, I've had him since he was about 9 weeks old... I am home with him 24 hours a day, I am the only one that trains him and plays with him and pretty much feeds him and gives him treats and takes him for walks... so basically I do everything with this dog and my fiance does absolutely nothing, and even yells at him and doesn't have the patience for him, but my question is why does the dog seem to like my fiance better, I just don't get this... he even seems to listen to him better?
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post #2 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-01-2019, 07:21 PM
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Very common. It is because your fiance is a valuable resource because your dog does not have access to him all the time or receive his attention all these time. My guess is your fiance gives your dog attention when he wants to, not when the dog wants it so that attention becomes very special and hard won. You attention is constant and unwavering, always on tap whenever your dog wants it and he likely doesn't have to work very hard to earn it. This we have to work hard to obtain are more valuable.



There was an online article about this, but seems to have been removed from the site it was on.
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post #3 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-01-2019, 07:55 PM
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Originally Posted by DieselsMommy View Post
Hi everyone, I have a question about my 9 month old male German Shepherd, I've had him since he was about 9 weeks old... I am home with him 24 hours a day, I am the only one that trains him and plays with him and pretty much feeds him and gives him treats and takes him for walks... so basically I do everything with this dog and my fiance does absolutely nothing, and even yells at him and doesn't have the patience for him, but my question is why does the dog seem to like my fiance better, I just don't get this... he even seems to listen to him better?
Yup super common, but don't feel bad. Watch who the dog goes to when he is unsure, scared, sick or hurt.

Shadow likes everyone better then me, but is a total momma's suck when crap is happening!
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post #4 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-02-2019, 10:40 AM
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Gosh story of my life 😂 I had the same issue Me and my mom that is (am a girl) I used to call it sexism lol Me and mom do everything from feeding to taking care of them but both my dogs ( previous and current pup) seems to worship our dad only 🙄 Guess they have a thing with males lolol
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post #5 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-02-2019, 12:25 PM
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My guy is eight yrs so I've only gathered 8 yrs and 2 cents worth about the subject by watching him. I'm his absolute primary providing all his needs so any break in the routine with other family members causes excitement and total attention. I use to inwardly become perturbed but learned to enjoy watching the interactions as long as the human was acting appropriately.

Dh sometimes thinks I'm mean when I make my boy stay and wait or insist that he do something when he wants to do something else but my guy actually loves the structure. Will attach to Dh hip for some things but his eyes light up and detaches whenever I say "come on let's go"

Over the years I've realized just how much he values what and who he views as his one special human. It takes time to realize Keep doing what your doing and make it fun. Stick to your rules and enjoy. :-)

"If you can't see his soul when you look in his eyes, then you need a seeing-eye dog"
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post #6 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-02-2019, 01:05 PM
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When Max was a pup he seemed to have bonded right away to my ex. I had to put the work in and and it sure paid off. The dogs enjoy everyone in the family but they know who puts the solid time in they really do. Patience and perseverance and goodtimes!


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post #7 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-02-2019, 01:24 PM
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Play, spontaneity, randomness, and fun. Put those into your day and you won't have a problem with the "shiny new toy" effect.
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post #8 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-02-2019, 02:20 PM
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Originally Posted by Bramble View Post


There was an online article about this, but seems to have been removed from the site it was on.



Not sure if this is the article......but I did notice it no longer is on K9Deb's web site.


" KING OF THE CASTLE SYNDROME
I often hear from people that are not experiencing any real behavior problems with their dog, but they want an explanation for a very common phenomenon that I call "King of the Castle Syndrome". The call almost always comes from the woman of the house. Jane wanted a dog and John didn't. They agreed that Jane would get the dog and it would be her dog. Jane gets the dog and she's very happy! She dotes on him, she feeds him, bathes him and brushes him every day. She provides him with everything a dog could ever want -- except leadership. John ignores the dog most of the time, but is not unfriendly to him. When the dog approaches John while he's reading the newspaper John looks at him, then goes back to reading. When the dog approaches Jane she stops what she's doing and plays with him. What has prompted the phone call is that Jane is feeling rejected by the dog. When John comes home from work the dog acts like he's greeting his long lost, beloved grandmother. John gives the dog a pat on the head and a "Hi there dog" and goes about his business. Jane is upset because the dog is never that happy to see her and she always lavishes attention on him when she gets home! During the evening the dog will lay quietly and happily at John's feet. When he wants attention he goes to Jane and bugs her until she gives him what he wants. What has happened, over time, is that John has begun to enjoy having a dog. When John is so inclined, he calls the dog over for petting or ball throwing or to take him for a walk. As much as the dog seems to love Jane, he is completely devoted to John. John has the attitude of an alpha. That's all it takes, attitude. It doesn't take aggression, it doesn't take rolling a dog onto it's back and growling, it doesn't take hitting or yelling -- just attitude."





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post #9 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-02-2019, 02:44 PM
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Originally Posted by SuperG View Post
Not sure if this is the article......but I did notice it no longer is on K9Deb's web site.


" KING OF THE CASTLE SYNDROME
I often hear from people that are not experiencing any real behavior problems with their dog, but they want an explanation for a very common phenomenon that I call "King of the Castle Syndrome". The call almost always comes from the woman of the house. Jane wanted a dog and John didn't. They agreed that Jane would get the dog and it would be her dog. Jane gets the dog and she's very happy! She dotes on him, she feeds him, bathes him and brushes him every day. She provides him with everything a dog could ever want -- except leadership. John ignores the dog most of the time, but is not unfriendly to him. When the dog approaches John while he's reading the newspaper John looks at him, then goes back to reading. When the dog approaches Jane she stops what she's doing and plays with him. What has prompted the phone call is that Jane is feeling rejected by the dog. When John comes home from work the dog acts like he's greeting his long lost, beloved grandmother. John gives the dog a pat on the head and a "Hi there dog" and goes about his business. Jane is upset because the dog is never that happy to see her and she always lavishes attention on him when she gets home! During the evening the dog will lay quietly and happily at John's feet. When he wants attention he goes to Jane and bugs her until she gives him what he wants. What has happened, over time, is that John has begun to enjoy having a dog. When John is so inclined, he calls the dog over for petting or ball throwing or to take him for a walk. As much as the dog seems to love Jane, he is completely devoted to John. John has the attitude of an alpha. That's all it takes, attitude. It doesn't take aggression, it doesn't take rolling a dog onto it's back and growling, it doesn't take hitting or yelling -- just attitude."



SuperG

Yup that was it. Not sure why it's gone, looks like it has been taken over as some sort of review site. it was a good article so it is too bad it's gone.

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post #10 of 12 (permalink) Old 06-03-2019, 02:19 AM
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I find that relationships build better when there's good training involved and boundaries established.

In lots of situations it seems to be what SuperG had posted, but I'm really happy that isn't the case for me because I won't lie... I'm a jealous pet owner, haha. But I attribute it to the training we've had together. She has been 100% my dog, with me the most, and around me almost every minute she's out of the crate since she was 9 weeks old. She's now 2. There's zero question who she listens better to... my partner will often come find and ask me to give my dog a command because she flips him the doggy middle finger. But that's because since day one I'm the one who established rules, created and reinforced boundaries, gave the rewards, worked her, and established a working/play relationship.

Needless to say, whenever someone else comes home she walks to the door, looks at them, then walks back to me. When I walk in the door, it's a giant party and she has to hug me, kiss me, and run circles around me, lol. When my partner comes home, she wags her tail excitedly and then comes to me for pets... haha. And I'm the big sucky momma who dotes on my dog, too.
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