Last week I lost my beautiful girl, Solstice, to mesenteric torsion. A horrible, sudden medical condition that I had never heard of until it took her for no reason that I can fathom. She was eight days away from turning five years old and I thought we would have many more years together.
I have lost pets before, to old age or chronic illness, and it hurts. But to lose Solstice so young and so suddenly is excruciating. She was The One, that special dog, that deep connection. My heart and soul, my sun and moon. I feel cheated, destroyed that she was taken so soon and that she died so painfully. She didn't deserve it.
"Someday the road ahead of you will be shorter than the road behind you." For some reason that phrase had been sticking in my mind the past 2-3 months. I knew that someday would come for Solstice, I just did not think it had already passed.
Nobody expected her to make it as far in agility as she did. She was fearful, skittish, sound sensitive. Not what I expected when I was picking her as my new agility puppy, and those issues didn't become apparent until she was a bit older. But she was what I needed. Together we learned, grew braver, and she blossomed. Lots of titles and great runs. The weaves were her favorite. I could talk a lot more about her agility career, but even though it was one of the biggest parts of our lives, it wasn't the most important and I'm glad I knew that when she was alive.
She loved agility because we did it together, but she loved hiking even more. As hard as it is to focus on the happy memories while the grief is still so fresh, there is one that I can latch on to. The day before she died, we went on a beautiful hike in the Snowy Range of Wyoming. It was a trail we had never been on and we found a beautiful meadow, where Solstice ran and leaped with such joy. I am so glad I have that memory of her. I have her ashes now, and someday when I feel ready, I will return some of her to that meadow.
8/27/2011 - 8/19/2016