Don't assume your dog was abused by men. You are probably correct that he is guarding you, treating you as his prize, what he depends on. We can give you advice on line but your best bet will be to find a face to face training situation. Find a trainer who is NOT all positive/ force free. You have to find someone who has a good balance of teaching your dog what is expected fairly and kindly but also firm enough to show your dog what lines cannot be crossed. An extra set of eyes will see things you will miss being in the middle of the situation, and help you with the timing of corrections and rewards and communicate with the dog more clearly.
If your dog is snapping and looks like he might bite, muzzle train him. Better to not let him bite because if he gets labeled dangerous that is a whole extra level of work you'll have to deal with. And for basic training if you have to tell your dog NO, follow it up with something he can do, and then follow that with praise. Let's use a behavior like counter surfing. If you dog puts his paws on the counter while you are working in the kitchen, you nudge him down and have him sit in a special spot, maybe a small kitchen carpet. I call those the yummy spot. It is the spot the dog must sit to get a tasty tidbit, no where else. So it would work like this...No, You cannot put your paws on the counter. Yes, you can sit on the mat. Here is your treat for sitting on the mat. (just make sure you have time between the time between the NO and the Yes, or they can string it together. If I go on the counter then sit on the mat, I get a treat.).
You may have to work something out like that. Hubby comes into the room. Your dog gives him the stink-eye. You tell him NO, go lay down. After a little bit you praise your dog while in the down. After a few days of that you don't reward for a down after a stink-eye but you do reward if he downs without the stink-eye...in fact, throw a little party! Let him know that makes you all very happy and life is good!
Patton CGC BH
Chief fetch fanatic
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