Hi All,
I just wanted to share a very unfortunate turn of things that happened last Friday on 11th October. Our beloved and family's love of life, dear Rex left us.
He was just 18 months and was very active and full of life. Just about a month and half we moved to our new house in Barrie from Whitby and one of the main reason was to get a bigger house with a big backyard for him to run and play which he seems to like a lot.
I am writing this post to share and just wanted to be amongst you all to feel ok and to know if what i think happened is usual.
Since the time we got him from the breeder at 8 weeks, he was never away from the family for more than 10 hours ( when we left him in the kennel) or at home for more than 5 to 6 hours. I work from home most of the time but back in Whitby the house was small and there was a kind of feeling that we are near by even though i might be upstairs in the room working and Rex lying near the door waiting for my wife ( was working part-time in before and after school child care) or kids to come back from school. My wife used to leave very early and would be back home by the time the kids left for school and later when she left for work in the afternoon , it was almost time for the kids to come back so in a sense he was not alone or felt alone.
Moving to Barrie in the big house with the big backyard was a decision we made when we saw he is growing and being a big dog he needs space to run around. We found him so happy in the new house and he claimed the house as his own within days and would play in the backyard or pull us to sit in the swing on the deck and run around the house playing hide and seek with my younger son.
All these happened in the summer holiday and then when the school opened the kids were gone in the morning. My wife didn't look for a job here and as usual Rex would follow my wife for each step she would take either to the kitchen or basement or garage or backyard or even the bathroom. In the mid of September my wife and younger one left for India and it was about 2 weeks she had left.
There was nothing different in the routine. I would go for our walk in the morning and evening as usual. Sometimes we would meeting my elder son on the way when he is going to catch his school bus @ 7:30am or he would meet him at the door if we come back before he left. I would give him food and then i would go to the basement in my office to login and start working. I usually do not get out untill lunch or something till 5pm. My elder some comes back at 3pm from school and would usually go into his room and be there busy with his assignment or study.
On the 11th Oct, the guy who came to do our window caulking rang the bell and as usual Rex rant to the door barking as he would do. This door is plain glass from top half and the sidelights on both side which goes from top to bottom also has plain glass so he can very well clearly who is outside. I pulled back Rex and told him to sit and slightly opened the door. The guy asked me to move my car and van from the driveway so that he can put his ladder and start working. I closed the door and went inside to take the keys. Rex knew i am going out and as usual wanted to go out with me but i told him to sit and wait. I went outside and got into the car and moved it a little and then went into the van and did the same thing and came inside. And there he was lying on his side with mouth open with his tongue out. I tried to shake him. I pumped his heart. I held his mouth and tried to do CPR. Ran and got some water and sprinkled on him but he was just lying lifeless. I observed his chest and there was not movement. I immediately called the guy to help me lift him. He was almost 90 pounds. I drove like crazy to a vet clinic nearby which is about 5 mins drive. I called them and a vet came running and she checked and said he is gone already.
I am not writing what i went through the moment i saw him lying there when i entered inside after moving the car and van back and at the vet clinic and till now.
This is my assessment and some new things i am now relating that may have also happened.
He was very closed to everybody in the house and mostly with my wife and younger one. After the school opened the kids were away in the school and then suddenly he could not see my wife and the younger one when they left for India. My elder one would leave by 7:30am and i would go to basement at 8:30am almost till 5pm and maybe coming upstairs once. For this two weeks almost he must've been missing my wife and younger son as i would see him going to his room and coming out and initially he would go to the other side of our bed where my wife sleeps and would bark as if trying to wake her up thinking she is sleeping with the face covered with the blanket etc. He would sit on the stairs the whole day as i found him on few occasions i came upstairs. The only time i would hear a commotion upstairs is when my elder son came back from the school. He has a special greeting for him which involves jumping and pulling his shoes and hands and occasional peeing.
I think some kind of depression must have been building within himself and he was feeling alone or felt being abandoned by the person he loved most. The moment when i went outside to move the car, he must've thought i too am leaving him when he saw me enter the car through the glass door.
The vet in the clinic took an x-ray when i requested as i thought maybe when he was inside and he was jumping on the door he must've twisted his neck or something but she didn't see anything of that sort but rather she found his liver to be abnormal and big in size and guessed his heart was weak. She stated that Rex had died of instant heart failure.
I then started thinking about few things we had observed and started linking to it. Often when he would run in the backyard like a deer alone or even play with any of us and when later he would stop, we noticed he seems very tired and would pant a lot and would lie down for quite some time rest and then be ok. Also one of the beaches is very near to our house (approx 900 meters) in Barrie and the walking trail is like a slope while going to the beach. Rex is always kind of leading and with a force of his own out on a walk and while going to the beach we always had to pull back on the leash but while coming back and climbing we always noticed he is slow and is tired and he would actually walk behind by the time we have climbed and are out of the trail on the road. After reaching home he would just lie down for quite some time and we thought he would be fine after some more walks as he will build stamina.
I recently discussed this with one of my uncle who is a qualified doctor and he said he must have had a sub clinical congenital heart condition as his liver was abnormal. As he was already under a sort of depression, when he saw me getting into the car his anxiety level must have suddenly shot up and as a result he had sudden massive heart failure.
We are all so devastated thinking that he died alone missing us all and nobody was there near him. What pain he must have been going through thinking people he loved have abandoned him.
The only good thing is that he didn't suffer as he didn't peed or pooed or didn't vomit when he died. Even later in the evening when i was still there with him in the vet clinic, his eyes were normal and not bulging or popping out to indicate he had suffered during his last moments.
I know its a passing phase and only time will heal it but i just can't seem to think why it happened the way it happened. He must've thought he is alone and was being left alone and the last thing he saw was me getting into the car which he felt so painful that it killed him.
We do remember his naughtiness and the things he would do but it hurts more.
Its very soon and we still can't seem to accept he is no more. We as a family have decided we are not keeping any more dogs or pets. Not because we are afraid to take care of any dog but we cannot match or even come near to their selfless love and dedication. We can't bear the thought of having someone who gave all he has for nothing. He never cared what we fed him or where he put his bed or what we do to him. His only need in his life was to be with us and have our time. At times its difficult in our daily routine to be always with him but never imagined he will have such deep separation anxiety building up inside him. He never showed any other indication and would eat normally and play with us later in the evening after i would logout and went for our evening walk etc. There was no other health indication in the past or recently in his behavior or physically or anything.
Rex was my first dog in life and first in our family here. I'm still afraid to see and face my younger one when he returns next week on 18th. Although we have told him as we thought its better he knows and sort of accepts that Rex is not there anymore rather than expecting him to wait on the door when he returns and going crazy seeing them as he does everytime and then being told he is no more. I just can't explain to anybody how we all are going through and i've been crying with my elder son on occasions.
Here are some of his pictures. All i can say is please pray and if i could i would let him know we all loved him more than anything and no-one left him.
Thanks.
I just wanted to share a very unfortunate turn of things that happened last Friday on 11th October. Our beloved and family's love of life, dear Rex left us.
He was just 18 months and was very active and full of life. Just about a month and half we moved to our new house in Barrie from Whitby and one of the main reason was to get a bigger house with a big backyard for him to run and play which he seems to like a lot.
I am writing this post to share and just wanted to be amongst you all to feel ok and to know if what i think happened is usual.
Since the time we got him from the breeder at 8 weeks, he was never away from the family for more than 10 hours ( when we left him in the kennel) or at home for more than 5 to 6 hours. I work from home most of the time but back in Whitby the house was small and there was a kind of feeling that we are near by even though i might be upstairs in the room working and Rex lying near the door waiting for my wife ( was working part-time in before and after school child care) or kids to come back from school. My wife used to leave very early and would be back home by the time the kids left for school and later when she left for work in the afternoon , it was almost time for the kids to come back so in a sense he was not alone or felt alone.
Moving to Barrie in the big house with the big backyard was a decision we made when we saw he is growing and being a big dog he needs space to run around. We found him so happy in the new house and he claimed the house as his own within days and would play in the backyard or pull us to sit in the swing on the deck and run around the house playing hide and seek with my younger son.
All these happened in the summer holiday and then when the school opened the kids were gone in the morning. My wife didn't look for a job here and as usual Rex would follow my wife for each step she would take either to the kitchen or basement or garage or backyard or even the bathroom. In the mid of September my wife and younger one left for India and it was about 2 weeks she had left.
There was nothing different in the routine. I would go for our walk in the morning and evening as usual. Sometimes we would meeting my elder son on the way when he is going to catch his school bus @ 7:30am or he would meet him at the door if we come back before he left. I would give him food and then i would go to the basement in my office to login and start working. I usually do not get out untill lunch or something till 5pm. My elder some comes back at 3pm from school and would usually go into his room and be there busy with his assignment or study.
On the 11th Oct, the guy who came to do our window caulking rang the bell and as usual Rex rant to the door barking as he would do. This door is plain glass from top half and the sidelights on both side which goes from top to bottom also has plain glass so he can very well clearly who is outside. I pulled back Rex and told him to sit and slightly opened the door. The guy asked me to move my car and van from the driveway so that he can put his ladder and start working. I closed the door and went inside to take the keys. Rex knew i am going out and as usual wanted to go out with me but i told him to sit and wait. I went outside and got into the car and moved it a little and then went into the van and did the same thing and came inside. And there he was lying on his side with mouth open with his tongue out. I tried to shake him. I pumped his heart. I held his mouth and tried to do CPR. Ran and got some water and sprinkled on him but he was just lying lifeless. I observed his chest and there was not movement. I immediately called the guy to help me lift him. He was almost 90 pounds. I drove like crazy to a vet clinic nearby which is about 5 mins drive. I called them and a vet came running and she checked and said he is gone already.
I am not writing what i went through the moment i saw him lying there when i entered inside after moving the car and van back and at the vet clinic and till now.
This is my assessment and some new things i am now relating that may have also happened.
He was very closed to everybody in the house and mostly with my wife and younger one. After the school opened the kids were away in the school and then suddenly he could not see my wife and the younger one when they left for India. My elder one would leave by 7:30am and i would go to basement at 8:30am almost till 5pm and maybe coming upstairs once. For this two weeks almost he must've been missing my wife and younger son as i would see him going to his room and coming out and initially he would go to the other side of our bed where my wife sleeps and would bark as if trying to wake her up thinking she is sleeping with the face covered with the blanket etc. He would sit on the stairs the whole day as i found him on few occasions i came upstairs. The only time i would hear a commotion upstairs is when my elder son came back from the school. He has a special greeting for him which involves jumping and pulling his shoes and hands and occasional peeing.
I think some kind of depression must have been building within himself and he was feeling alone or felt being abandoned by the person he loved most. The moment when i went outside to move the car, he must've thought i too am leaving him when he saw me enter the car through the glass door.
The vet in the clinic took an x-ray when i requested as i thought maybe when he was inside and he was jumping on the door he must've twisted his neck or something but she didn't see anything of that sort but rather she found his liver to be abnormal and big in size and guessed his heart was weak. She stated that Rex had died of instant heart failure.
I then started thinking about few things we had observed and started linking to it. Often when he would run in the backyard like a deer alone or even play with any of us and when later he would stop, we noticed he seems very tired and would pant a lot and would lie down for quite some time rest and then be ok. Also one of the beaches is very near to our house (approx 900 meters) in Barrie and the walking trail is like a slope while going to the beach. Rex is always kind of leading and with a force of his own out on a walk and while going to the beach we always had to pull back on the leash but while coming back and climbing we always noticed he is slow and is tired and he would actually walk behind by the time we have climbed and are out of the trail on the road. After reaching home he would just lie down for quite some time and we thought he would be fine after some more walks as he will build stamina.
I recently discussed this with one of my uncle who is a qualified doctor and he said he must have had a sub clinical congenital heart condition as his liver was abnormal. As he was already under a sort of depression, when he saw me getting into the car his anxiety level must have suddenly shot up and as a result he had sudden massive heart failure.
We are all so devastated thinking that he died alone missing us all and nobody was there near him. What pain he must have been going through thinking people he loved have abandoned him.
The only good thing is that he didn't suffer as he didn't peed or pooed or didn't vomit when he died. Even later in the evening when i was still there with him in the vet clinic, his eyes were normal and not bulging or popping out to indicate he had suffered during his last moments.
I know its a passing phase and only time will heal it but i just can't seem to think why it happened the way it happened. He must've thought he is alone and was being left alone and the last thing he saw was me getting into the car which he felt so painful that it killed him.
We do remember his naughtiness and the things he would do but it hurts more.
Its very soon and we still can't seem to accept he is no more. We as a family have decided we are not keeping any more dogs or pets. Not because we are afraid to take care of any dog but we cannot match or even come near to their selfless love and dedication. We can't bear the thought of having someone who gave all he has for nothing. He never cared what we fed him or where he put his bed or what we do to him. His only need in his life was to be with us and have our time. At times its difficult in our daily routine to be always with him but never imagined he will have such deep separation anxiety building up inside him. He never showed any other indication and would eat normally and play with us later in the evening after i would logout and went for our evening walk etc. There was no other health indication in the past or recently in his behavior or physically or anything.
Rex was my first dog in life and first in our family here. I'm still afraid to see and face my younger one when he returns next week on 18th. Although we have told him as we thought its better he knows and sort of accepts that Rex is not there anymore rather than expecting him to wait on the door when he returns and going crazy seeing them as he does everytime and then being told he is no more. I just can't explain to anybody how we all are going through and i've been crying with my elder son on occasions.
Here are some of his pictures. All i can say is please pray and if i could i would let him know we all loved him more than anything and no-one left him.
Thanks.