I can understand that a puppy is a joyful thing, but the work involved--and sometimes the frustration--is tremendous. My Jupey is 7.5 months, but he has required so much work, time, energy, training, and control, that it has really taken a toll on us. And me being relatively young and being able to work out of the home. It seems to me that in your situation, there might just not be enough "you" to go around, if you understand.
My parents bought an Australian Silky Terrier for my grandma, but she unfortunately got stomach cancer and they had to take the dog off her hands in short order. The dog ended up living to 18, which was about 17 years after my grandma passed away.
It seems to me by saving a doggie from a shelter, you can get a dog who's calmed down, whose temperament is better known, and perhaps saving that life might give your family an infusion of happiness.
Best wishes to you and yours.