Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you? - German Shepherd Dog Forums
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post #1 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 02:00 AM Thread Starter
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Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

Purely hypothetical I assure you.

Interesting question, Do you as a person, stoop to certain levels to get even or do you maintain your dignity and just walk away knowing that you did decide to keep dignity in tact? Can you live with a decision that could hurt someone to the core just in an attempt to strike out and get even?

For instance, say you knew a detail about someone that would not make any difference to you, you don't care and it does not directly affect you, such as oh..... not keeping insurance on their car even though it is mandated by the state, or keeping a item that was ordered and delivered twice, allowing them to keep two and only pay for one, or even, not following licensing laws with animals. Now with this knowledge, after taking all of their outbursts and bothering you at home and work way too much. After attempting to stay away and even trying to avoid this person to the point it is interrupting your own schedule and or loves of life, without much success. Do you stoop to the level to notify proper authorities just to make their life more difficult in an attempt to "get even" regardless of the fact that this item has NO effect on your life? Just complicates theirs, or do you maintain your dignity and walk away with your head held high knowing that you could have done something like that but chose to follow your heart and not cause harm in others no matter what their actions might make you consider?

For instance:

Say an acquaintance of yours, not necessarily a friend, has decided to try to slander you and your name for something purely not your fault and you happened to know that they lived in an apartment that did not allow pets and they just went and got one. In an attempt to get them busy with their own life and just leave you alone, do you report them? Seriously it not going to matter to you, can you live with making a decision like this? Or do you just continue to turn the other cheek hoping that they will get bored without a response back and move on to their next victim?

Is getting even all that it is cracked up to be or is it better to keep your self esteem in tact and your morals no matter how much they make your life difficult?

Ricci: Sable GSD Born 7/26/2010
Cleo: Dilute Ragdoll Kitten-9-10
Apu: Lovie- 4-10
Charlie and Peewee Cockatiels 1-10
Hercules: Ocelot- Rainbow Bridge 9/10
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post #2 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 02:08 AM
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

You know, it's funny, I would like to believe that I would always keep my dignity and just walk away and let Karma get them on their own. I had a similar situation actually happen to me. A guy I worked with when I lived in WA state made my life a living he!!. He set me up time and time again. I dont even know what I ever did to this guy to make him hate me so much, I found out later he wanted my job so he set out to get me fired. Anyway, I left that job, got a better one in a new state even, but my first business trip a week into my new job sent me to Barbados for a week. In a bit of spite........I sent a postcard back to my old office from Barbados........ My friend said she kept trying to show him the postcard and he wouldnt even look at it. As it turns out, he did get my job, briefly, he failed miserably and it was soon discovered just how devious he had been. I actually felt kind of guilty for rubbing it in. But the way I see it, the best revenge, is to live well.

Betsy

Ava GSD 3.5yrs

Champ 1985, Heidi 2000

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post #3 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 02:17 AM
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

The venom required to not only lash out in "revenge" but also to sustain such considerations with all implications, would already be poisoning the person from within if he/she were contemplating "getting even." To avoid even the beginnings of inner rot, not only would I "drop it"-- I wouldn"t even "pick up" the feelings of toxic "getting even" to begin with. Life is too short for anything but as much lightness in my heart as I can have. Enough heavy stuff comes along. I can be angry at an injustice dealt me, that's fine-- but no toxic, roiling, sickening venom inside me.. no thanks. The harboring of such considerations as well as the act of revenge aren't the kind of poison I want inside of me.

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post #4 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 02:18 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

I too want to think that I could keep my morals about me and thus having a conscience would prevent me from doing the "unthinkable" up to this moment. It is tempting, to say the least. I chuckle a little bit about the thought of it, with the knowledge that they, themselves, were the one that actually gave me my tool with providing information that was really detrimental to their own good. Now, do I use it? How will I feel in the morning? If it was my ex, I could possibly do it, but an acquaintance? Does Karma really come around to those people that do stuff like this and are they possibly too ignorant to realize that it was Karma that just hit them....... wait, I think I just answered my own question. I remember something that is going on in their life that there is no way I would be willing to trade places with them. Such is live and let live goes, I guess.

Ricci: Sable GSD Born 7/26/2010
Cleo: Dilute Ragdoll Kitten-9-10
Apu: Lovie- 4-10
Charlie and Peewee Cockatiels 1-10
Hercules: Ocelot- Rainbow Bridge 9/10
Bob: Aussie- rainbow bridge Feb 07
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post #5 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 02:23 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

Quote:
Originally Posted By: BrightelfThe venom required to not only lash out in "revenge" but also to sustain such considerations with all implications, would already be poisoning the person from within if he/she were contemplating "getting even." To avoid even the beginnings of inner rot, not only would I "drop it"-- I wouldn"t even "pick up" the feelings of toxic "getting even" to begin with. Life is too short for anything but as much lightness in my heart as I can have. Enough heavy stuff comes along. I can be angry at an injustice dealt me, that's fine-- but no toxic, roiling, sickening venom inside me.. no thanks. The harboring of such considerations as well as the act of revenge aren't the kind of poison I want inside of me.
Thank you Patti, what perfect way to answer this question. I think I will go send a "thinking of you card" to my daughters best friend (16 years old) that just found out she has a very rapid moving bone cancer. Good night to everyone! I hope you have peace as you sleep.

Ricci: Sable GSD Born 7/26/2010
Cleo: Dilute Ragdoll Kitten-9-10
Apu: Lovie- 4-10
Charlie and Peewee Cockatiels 1-10
Hercules: Ocelot- Rainbow Bridge 9/10
Bob: Aussie- rainbow bridge Feb 07
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post #6 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 02:25 AM
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

to you, Dorian. Good thoughts and vibes to your daughter's young friend for her fight.

Patti
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Grimm van den Heuvel, aka "The Doofinator"
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post #7 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 02:31 AM
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

Thanks Patti, that was very well stated. One act of revenge I think actually festers into something terrible. While my postcard wasnt revenge in any way shape or form. It was thumbing my nose, and I even felt guilty for that. I dont have the kind of energy to keep up with evil doers or keep score or whatever it is that drives people. From my own experience, I ended up in a better place and bettered my own life. I even considered sending a thank you note to him for keeping me from becoming complacent and not living my life to the fullest.......but it certainly would not have been received well But the truth is, if he hadnt been such a miserable hateful person, I probably would not have decided to move and try something new. I would not have met my husband, and not have had the life I now enjoy. Sometime our miseries, are blessings in disquise.......I know it sounds funny, and if anyone had told me at the time it was a blessing I would have laughed at them. But years later, I am thankful.

Betsy

Ava GSD 3.5yrs

Champ 1985, Heidi 2000

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post #8 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 02:34 AM
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

I will be thinking you and your daughters friend. I hope all turns out the best it can.

Betsy

Ava GSD 3.5yrs

Champ 1985, Heidi 2000

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post #9 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 03:25 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

ty all, Bobbi just told me about this, I guess technically it was last night. This child has a serious heart problem as well and now this. I can not imagine! My daughter was a real challenge to get raised and not allowed to just grow up and get big. She was headstrong and independant and litteraly drove me crazy. I grounded her from the phone once, ended up having to take all phones from my house, she rebuilt the phones with pieces of this one and that one etc, I stopped that by cutting the phone lines in the home. Her answer, she went outside and was plugging a phone into the telephone utility box and was using it out there....... ugh! But I have always been thankfull that she was active and capable of being so much a challenge, instead of being confined in a wheel chair, I am thankfull she kept me on my toes and that she is and has grown up into the best person I could have hoped for. I admire her and respect her and am so proud of her. She is turning 18 in April. This has leveled her though and is now causing her to look back at all the things she has done to others with regret and remorse, including going out of her way to push her little brother around that suffers from autism. She has not slept for 30 hours due to fear and trying to come to terms with this childs illness. Makes little things seem less prevelant!

Ricci: Sable GSD Born 7/26/2010
Cleo: Dilute Ragdoll Kitten-9-10
Apu: Lovie- 4-10
Charlie and Peewee Cockatiels 1-10
Hercules: Ocelot- Rainbow Bridge 9/10
Bob: Aussie- rainbow bridge Feb 07
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post #10 of 38 (permalink) Old 12-15-2009, 03:48 AM
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Re: Quite the delima. To stoop to levels below you?

Don't mess with dirt, you get dirty at the end.!!!!!, This is a Turkish saying...

Musa

My Kenzo 07/2007-11/2008 RIP My Baby Boy

Laila Pester-ella (the evil minpin) DOB:11/2007



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