Annoyed about tomorrow... just a vent :)

chelle · 11-23-2011, 07:48 PM

I'm going to come across as super ungrateful.

But I'm still irritated.

We're going to the parent's house tomorrow for our Thanksgiving meal. Bailey isn't welcome.

He isn't welcome because my brother is coming in from out of town and is bringing his 3 yr old male Aussie.

My parents own a sweet little Boston Terrier girl, Bailey's favorite little playmate. They have a BLAST together.... BUT the Aussie gets very jealous and goes after Bailey. Actually I don't know if it's jealousy or what the heck it is, Bailey is so dog-friendly it's odd this Aussie hates him so much. I haven't tried to get the Aussie and Bailey together without the little Boston around... my brother isn't in town often to try it. Anyway....

So on a 63 degree day! (AWESOME for my area in late November!) Bailey will be stuck home in his crate and denied the opportunity to play with his best girlfriend.

I'm feeling anti-Aussie right now.

I need to figure something out here, without cutting family time short and not ripping Bailey off out of a beautiful day and playtime. Ideas?

ponyfarm · 11-23-2011, 07:56 PM

AWW..so hard to keep humans and animals happy at the same time. Could you bring Bailey and keep him in a crate in your car and then let the dogs have separate times to play? Could your brother hold/crate/confine his dog so yours could play? HOw long will you be gone? Could you play a ton before you leave, and then lots on Friday?

At times like this, I try to use the 10-10-10 method to solve the problem. What would be the impact for you/your family/dog on that day if he stayed home? What would be the impact in 10 days in he had stayed home? What would be the impact in 10 years if he stayed home? Helps you think thru stuff..got it from a good book.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Rerun · 11-23-2011, 07:57 PM

Yes...peanut butter kong and a kiss goodbye and have a great Thanksgiving.

Seriously though, I know this is a dog board so I'll be the odd person out, but I've never expected to take my dogs to family members houses for any occasion, much less a major holiday. I give them a treat, tell them to have a nice relaxing nap filled day, and we go about our day. It's no different than if you leave to go to work and it's nice outside. The dog doesn't know it's Thanksgiving nor would it matter to them if they did. I wouldn't cut my time with family short on a holiday to get the dog to the park (if that's what you're insinuating), unless *I* really just didn't want to spend time with family and needed an excuse to leave.

I have, only on one occasion, taken a dog to Thanksgiving, and I asked long ahead of time. She stayed in my SUV for the bulk of the day (she was loaded up with toys, an adult, calm, used to being in the car, and it was a beautiful cool day here). They had a huge, unfenced, yard. They weren't comfortable with even having another dog in a crate in the house. She got play breaks to run the yard with me, and most of the family joined us as well actually. She slept the whole way home.

Dooney's Mom · 11-23-2011, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rerun

Yes...peanut butter kong and a kiss goodbye and have a great Thanksgiving.

Seriously though, I know this is a dog board so I'll be the odd person out, but I've never expected to take my dogs to family members houses for any occasion, much less a major holiday. I give them a treat, tell them to have a nice relaxing nap filled day, and we go about our day. It's no different than if you leave to go to work and it's nice outside. The dog doesn't know it's Thanksgiving nor would it matter to them if they did. I wouldn't cut my time with family short on a holiday to get the dog to the park (if that's what you're insinuating), unless *I* really just didn't want to spend time with family and needed an excuse to leave.

I have, only on one occasion, taken a dog to Thanksgiving, and I asked long ahead of time. She stayed in my SUV for the bulk of the day (she was loaded up with toys, an adult, calm, used to being in the car, and it was a beautiful cool day here). They had a huge, unfenced, yard. They weren't comfortable with even having another dog in a crate in the house. She got play breaks to run the yard with me, and most of the family joined us as well actually. She slept the whole way home.

I have to agree. I know it sucks, but your brother is coming in from out of town with his dog. Hopefully you have a 4 day weekend and you can spend all day Friday with the dog unless you are of course one of those black friday shoppers-

in which case i think you are nuts- haha

Spend the same amount of time you would have anyway with the family enjoy your Turkey Day and don't hold anymosity towards your brother for his unruly aussie, not everyone can own and enjoy our awesome GSD's like us. your brother probably loves his dog as much as you love yours and since he is from out of town I am assuming he lives further away than you do, and if HE were to leave his dog at home, it would be locked up for longer than Bailey.

good luck with tomorrow!

chelle · 11-23-2011, 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rerun

.....but I've never expected to take my dogs to family members houses for any occasion, much less a major holiday.

Oh I totally agree with you. I think the same way, but it hasn't been reciprocal (sp?) in the past.

When I've held family gatherings at my house, the family members have brought their dogs without a word ahead of time. Not even to ask if it was okay. Then there I was, working hard at a big meal and trying to manage a houseful of dogs. Way stressful!

Quote:

Originally Posted by ponyfarm

AWW..so hard to keep humans and animals happy at the same time. Could you bring Bailey and keep him in a crate in your car and then let the dogs have separate times to play? Could your brother hold/crate/confine his dog so yours could play? HOw long will you be gone? Could you play a ton before you leave, and then lots on Friday?

Happy Thanksgiving!!

I might try this, but no need to crate in the car, we only live a few miles apart. My brother will not be willing to crate his dog. At all. Happy Thanksgiving to you, too!!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dooney's Mom

I have to agree. I know it sucks, but your brother is coming in from out of town with his dog. Hopefully you have a 4 day weekend and you can spend all day Friday with the dog unless you are of course one of those black friday shoppers-

in which case i think you are nuts- haha

Spend the same amount of time you would have anyway with the family enjoy your Turkey Day and don't hold anymosity towards your brother for his unruly aussie, not everyone can own and enjoy our awesome GSD's like us. your brother probably loves his dog as much as you love yours and since he is from out of town I am assuming he lives further away than you do, and if HE were to leave his dog at home, it would be locked up for longer than Bailey.

good luck with tomorrow!

I do have a four day weekend, yay for that! And oh, oh, oh NO I am not a Black Friday shopper. <<Shivers at the thought.>> I once spent an overnight in line outside of Best Buy in 25 degree temps to save $100 on a laptop. Next time I'll pony up the extra $100.

Ok.. thank you for talking me off the wall, everyone.

Since it will be so incredibly nice tomorrow, we'll just get out of the house early and run the trails before we go. Then if I can work something else for him to visit or something, it'll be a bonus. I did text my brother and said I'd love for him to meet Bailey. He never has.

Rerun · 11-23-2011, 08:36 PM

I can understand why that would be aggravating to have others have their dogs welcome at your house (invited or not, you didn't turn them away at the door) but have yours not be welcome at theirs. It took me a long time to accept that within my own family. The house that my dog wasn't welcome in (had to stay in the car) all those years ago had another dog that wasn't really a great dog. Very unsocial with both people and other animals. Now, that dog has passed on and they have a new dog that is very social. Now they bring that dog with them and it stays in a family members house, even has stayed at mine, when they visit. But to be fair, I was invited to TG there this year as well (though we chose to stay in town with the other side of the family) and that same dog of mine was welcome at their place this year, actually INSIDE! So sometimes over the years, progress is made. The only reason I have to take that dog when I go there (3 hrs away) is because she is highly aggressive with my other female, will kill her if left alone. And I do not trust 99% of people to ensure they do NOT get accidently let together. Even in passing. So if someone has to do a potty break or whathave you if we are away, only my mother is trusted..anyone else, and I take my aggressor with me.

Daisy&Lucky's Mom · 11-23-2011, 08:46 PM

Suggest the Aussie be crated part of the time and Bailey can be to/ Dont know if it would work justa thought. sorry missed that it has been suggested earlier.

vicky2200 · 11-23-2011, 09:40 PM

Our dogs can't go to family events with us either. I don't like leaving them all day. Generally we walk them before we go, weather permitting. Then if we are gone too long we come home to let them out to pee. But usually one of us wants to come home after about 3 hours anyway. Exercise your dog before you leave and he should be fine.

sparra · 11-23-2011, 09:55 PM

So when you celebrate thanksgiving is it the same as Christmas in that the family come together or is it one or the other?
We don't have it here....pity...as it sounds like you get to have Christmas twice!!

What is "thanksgiving" (apart from the obvious) do you always get a 4 day holiday?

selzer · 11-23-2011, 10:05 PM

So brother brings the Aussie at Thanksgiving and you bring your dog at Christmas? Compromise. No one wants to be constantly separating dogs at a family doing. It should not always be one person's dog that is left out. But what would you have, your parents say no dogs? I understand your pain, but the dog won't mind. And if the day is long, bring the dog and keep it in the car. Then you can go out and take the dog for a walk a few times.

Don't let it wreck your holiday.

11-23-2011, 07:48 PM	#1 (permalink)
chelle Knighted Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Des Moines, IA Posts: 2,863	Annoyed about tomorrow... just a vent :) I'm going to come across as super ungrateful. But I'm still irritated. We're going to the parent's house tomorrow for our Thanksgiving meal. Bailey isn't welcome. He isn't welcome because my brother is coming in from out of town and is bringing his 3 yr old male Aussie. My parents own a sweet little Boston Terrier girl, Bailey's favorite little playmate. They have a BLAST together.... BUT the Aussie gets very jealous and goes after Bailey. Actually I don't know if it's jealousy or what the heck it is, Bailey is so dog-friendly it's odd this Aussie hates him so much. I haven't tried to get the Aussie and Bailey together without the little Boston around... my brother isn't in town often to try it. Anyway.... So on a 63 degree day! (AWESOME for my area in late November!) Bailey will be stuck home in his crate and denied the opportunity to play with his best girlfriend. I'm feeling anti-Aussie right now. I need to figure something out here, without cutting family time short and not ripping Bailey off out of a beautiful day and playtime. Ideas? __________________ Dolly Eskie 6/03 Suri Shiba 10/07 Bailey WGSD/Husky x 5/11 CGC Bailey's brother Tucker (rescue/foster dude) Tiger kitty '96 Information is power

11-23-2011, 09:40 PM	#8 (permalink)
vicky2200 Master Member Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Michigan Posts: 590	Our dogs can't go to family events with us either. I don't like leaving them all day. Generally we walk them before we go, weather permitting. Then if we are gone too long we come home to let them out to pee. But usually one of us wants to come home after about 3 hours anyway. Exercise your dog before you leave and he should be fine. __________________ Dakota GSD mix- 8yrs old Ditto GSD- 3yrs old Daisy Alaskan Husky- 2 yr old Weegee Toy Poodle- Puppy

11-23-2011, 10:05 PM	#10 (permalink)
selzer Crowned Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Denmark, Ohio Posts: 17,499	So brother brings the Aussie at Thanksgiving and you bring your dog at Christmas? Compromise. No one wants to be constantly separating dogs at a family doing. It should not always be one person's dog that is left out. But what would you have, your parents say no dogs? I understand your pain, but the dog won't mind. And if the day is long, bring the dog and keep it in the car. Then you can go out and take the dog for a walk a few times. Don't let it wreck your holiday. __________________ RIP Arwen, CD RN CGC RIP Whitney, RN CGC Jenna, RN CGC Babs, CD RA CGC Herding Instinct Certificate Heidi, RA CGC Tori, RN CGC SG3 Odessa, SchH1, Kkl1, AD Ninja, RN CGC Milla, RN CGC Joy, Star Puppy, RN CGC Dolly & Bear

11-23-2011, 07:56 PM	#2 (permalink)
ponyfarm Master Member Join Date: Apr 2010 Posts: 548	AWW..so hard to keep humans and animals happy at the same time. Could you bring Bailey and keep him in a crate in your car and then let the dogs have separate times to play? Could your brother hold/crate/confine his dog so yours could play? HOw long will you be gone? Could you play a ton before you leave, and then lots on Friday? At times like this, I try to use the 10-10-10 method to solve the problem. What would be the impact for you/your family/dog on that day if he stayed home? What would be the impact in 10 days in he had stayed home? What would be the impact in 10 years if he stayed home? Helps you think thru stuff..got it from a good book. Happy Thanksgiving!!

11-23-2011, 07:57 PM	#3 (permalink)
Rerun Crowned Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Indiana Posts: 5,608	Yes...peanut butter kong and a kiss goodbye and have a great Thanksgiving. Seriously though, I know this is a dog board so I'll be the odd person out, but I've never expected to take my dogs to family members houses for any occasion, much less a major holiday. I give them a treat, tell them to have a nice relaxing nap filled day, and we go about our day. It's no different than if you leave to go to work and it's nice outside. The dog doesn't know it's Thanksgiving nor would it matter to them if they did. I wouldn't cut my time with family short on a holiday to get the dog to the park (if that's what you're insinuating), unless I really just didn't want to spend time with family and needed an excuse to leave. I have, only on one occasion, taken a dog to Thanksgiving, and I asked long ahead of time. She stayed in my SUV for the bulk of the day (she was loaded up with toys, an adult, calm, used to being in the car, and it was a beautiful cool day here). They had a huge, unfenced, yard. They weren't comfortable with even having another dog in a crate in the house. She got play breaks to run the yard with me, and most of the family joined us as well actually. She slept the whole way home.

11-23-2011, 08:36 PM	#6 (permalink)
Rerun Crowned Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Indiana Posts: 5,608	I can understand why that would be aggravating to have others have their dogs welcome at your house (invited or not, you didn't turn them away at the door) but have yours not be welcome at theirs. It took me a long time to accept that within my own family. The house that my dog wasn't welcome in (had to stay in the car) all those years ago had another dog that wasn't really a great dog. Very unsocial with both people and other animals. Now, that dog has passed on and they have a new dog that is very social. Now they bring that dog with them and it stays in a family members house, even has stayed at mine, when they visit. But to be fair, I was invited to TG there this year as well (though we chose to stay in town with the other side of the family) and that same dog of mine was welcome at their place this year, actually INSIDE! So sometimes over the years, progress is made. The only reason I have to take that dog when I go there (3 hrs away) is because she is highly aggressive with my other female, will kill her if left alone. And I do not trust 99% of people to ensure they do NOT get accidently let together. Even in passing. So if someone has to do a potty break or whathave you if we are away, only my mother is trusted..anyone else, and I take my aggressor with me.

11-23-2011, 08:46 PM	#7 (permalink)
Daisy&Lucky's Mom Knighted Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: Ohio Posts: 2,437	Suggest the Aussie be crated part of the time and Bailey can be to/ Dont know if it would work justa thought. sorry missed that it has been suggested earlier.

11-23-2011, 09:55 PM	#9 (permalink)
sparra Master Member Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Australia Posts: 525	So when you celebrate thanksgiving is it the same as Christmas in that the family come together or is it one or the other? We don't have it here....pity...as it sounds like you get to have Christmas twice!! What is "thanksgiving" (apart from the obvious) do you always get a 4 day holiday?

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