Counter,
I emphasize with you totally. When I had my wolfdogs, I never neutered the males, they were easier to keep than the male GSDs I have had that I kept intact. I never had a neutered male canine until I got rescues. My males never sired a litter of oops puppies, either. And if I ever buy another male puppy from a breeder, he will not be neutered. And I will never get a puppy from a rescue--they neuter and spay WAY, WAY too young.
That being said, the rescues rarely if ever break their own rules. I'll give you an example why:
My sister has been in and out of mental institutions for nearly 5 years. Each time she has to go inpatient, there is another rule about what the patients can take in with them and what they can't. Example--no shoelaces, no scarves, no sweatpants or hoodies with any strings (we cut them out). The list goes on, even with things as simple as shampoo. Several of the workers explained to us that whenever we see a new rule, that means that something terrible has happened, a patient found some ingenious way to hurt him/herself or someone else, with something they were allowed to bring in. Thus, that item is then forever banned for everyone.
Rescues deal with thousands of dogs going to thousands of homes, and I am positive that they have seen many, many bad results from situations that had maybe one thing that wasn't perfect in the rescue's eyes. So please don't take the rejection personally... It's not you at fault, but all the idiots who did stupid things before you came along. I was once asked by one rescue to do a home check for them on someone within my area, and I thought the home was going to be perfect for a 3 month old puppy. I didn't get any negative vibes at all, neither did the rescue when they talked to the person on the phone, a mother with two children who said and did all the right things. That adoption turned out so bad I swore I would never be involved in home checks or anything else like it ever again, and I meant it.
So there is another side to the story, even though those of us on this forum do know your home is probably better than most of ours. Cool down, cut your losses, and look elsewhere. Believe me, I know what it is to be the type that gets your heart set on a particular animal, and you get as excited as though you were a child again. That's me all over. But I've also learned in over 6 decades on this earth, things don't always work out your way.
Regards and sympathy,
Susan