Question about my behavior around other dogs

[AthenaClimbs]

Hi all,
Every so often if Athena and I are at a doggy park there will be other dogs (small) looking for attention. Example, we were at the doggy park yesterday and there were about 50 other dogs. There were a lot of small fluffy dogs around (my other weakness) and a woman said I can hold her small pug. Which I did gladly and cradled and gushed over him. Much within Athena's earshot and line of sight. She came over a few times, saw us and sniffed us before running away.

I read that you shouldn't gush or hold other dogs in front of your pup, that it could lead to jealously or insecurity issues. Is there any truth to do this. I'll stop immediately if it might be true. Thoughts?

[mysweetkaos]

I think if you have a socialized, secure dog....it shouldn't be a problem. I don't know why it would be a problem...but I'm no expert. I'm not a "little" dog person, so I've never held a dog in front of mine....but I have loved on numerous big dogs with no problem in front of my boys.

[Castlemaid]

It's not up to your dog to decide what other dog you are allowed to hold or gush over. Sounds to me that Athena is very secure in her bond to you, and does not feel threatened at all, so congrats on a job well done with her.

Personally, as pack leader, I decide which dog gets my attention and affection, and my own dogs should accept and respect that. When I first had my rescue, she snapped at a puppy that I was petting - to me, that is not acceptable. But since she was new with me, I understood her insecurity, but that does not excuse it. I worked on letting her see that me giving attention to other dogs and puppies is no big deal, asked some brave and willing souls to use their pups as 'training goals', and worked on getting Keeta to be calm and accepting of me petting their pups. So she got lots of attention and treats when she was calm and not reacting, and it worked.

I read and hear about a lot of really odd stuff on the internet about what people should or shouldn't do with their dogs or around their dogs - I can see how confusing it can be for people. I say follow your gut on what you think is okay, and check in with the board for some feedback if you aren't sure, like you are doing now.

[Lilie]

I have a little dog at home. My GSD might get stirred up if I'm talking to her, saying things that hold key words to him, like "Do you wanna go outside?" or "Where's your toy?" He'll barge in the game as well.

But she is a lap dog, and he isn't. She weighs under 15 pounds. He is pushing 100. He'll stand next to the chair for loving, she'll bury herself under my leg.

Two different dogs, two different dynamics.

[AthenaClimbs]

Castlemaid, well said indeed.

Thank you all for your replies. She definitely gets plenty of loving from me and seems secure enough.

She definitely knows mommy goes home with her at the end of the day, that's how it should be, I guess.

[Freestep]

Originally Posted by Castlemaid

Personally, as pack leader, I decide which dog gets my attention and affection, and my own dogs should accept and respect that. When I first had my rescue, she snapped at a puppy that I was petting - to me, that is not acceptable. But since she was new with me, I understood her insecurity, but that does not excuse it.

Exactly. Some dogs do get "jealous" when you are giving attention to another dog--I used to have a dog like that. But I wouldn't allow it. I don't think loving on another dog will *make* a dog jealous, unless you have the jealous type to begin with.

By "jealous" I mean resource guarding. The dog guards his resource (you) against other dogs. The dog needs to understand that YOU make the decisions about who gets attention.