PLEASE PLEASE help!

[XinnKoda]

I have a 10 week old german shepherd and anytime I'm around him he's a pretty good dog. But, I'm pretty positive he has separation anxiety. I work graveyard shifts at my work so my wife has him during 4 nights of the week. When I leave the house, he IMMEDIATELY starts howling and barking and whining to the point my wife can't get any sleep because he is SO loud! She has to wait for him to eventually cry himself to sleep. I have read and read as much as I possibly can about separation anxiety and NOTHING is working! Many people suggested me leaving him in a room and coming back right after to reward him for not whining but the problem is the SECOND I close the door he freaks out! I don't even have 5 seconds of silence from him. And I can't "wait" it out. I put him in a room and close the door and he starts whining and literally will go for hours. He just doesn't stop! Even with my wife around him trying to comfort him he completely ignores her and just howls and whines. My wife is ready to get rid of him but I love the little guy. PLEASE help me!!! What do I do?

Thanks in advance,
George

[4TheDawgies]

Originally Posted by XinnKoda

I have a 10 week old german shepherd and anytime I'm around him he's a pretty good dog. But, I'm pretty positive he has separation anxiety. I work graveyard shifts at my work so my wife has him during 4 nights of the week. When I leave the house, he IMMEDIATELY starts howling and barking and whining to the point my wife can't get any sleep because he is SO loud! She has to wait for him to eventually cry himself to sleep. I have read and read as much as I possibly can about separation anxiety and NOTHING is working! Many people suggested me leaving him in a room and coming back right after to reward him for not whining but the problem is the SECOND I close the door he freaks out! I don't even have 5 seconds of silence from him. And I can't "wait" it out. I put him in a room and close the door and he starts whining and literally will go for hours. He just doesn't stop! Even with my wife around him trying to comfort him he completely ignores her and just howls and whines. My wife is ready to get rid of him but I love the little guy. PLEASE help me!!! What do I do?

Thanks in advance,
George

When you walk back into the room to be with the dog does he begin howling and carrying on when he sees you?
If so, then wait until he stops doing so before you begin forward to him. If he starts again stop immediately and look away. once he quiets down begin again towards him. This continues until you can open the door while he is silent. This entire process on the first time you attempt it MAY take a long time.
But heres why. You rewarded this behavior. Your dog is convinced howling, barking, and carrying on brings you back.

imagine this.
you push a button and $20 comes out.
well you are obviously going to keep pushing the button to continue getting your $20.
But after a while the button stops.

What would you do?

You would push the button harder, maybe faster, maybe lightly, maybe push the right side, then the left side to see if its just malfunctioning.

But your essentially increasing the previous behavior because thats what worked.

So apply this to your dog. One day he barks as you are walking out the door, you look to him and smile saying "I'll be back buddy" then continue out.
The next day he does the same and you don't respond, so he gets out of control, you turn around to hush him so he doesn't wake your wife, and he gets rewarded for the more intense behavior.
Then you walk out and it gets more intense but you leave.

then the following day he is more intense and your wife comes in and tries to help.

See how it escalates?
Thats called an Extinction burst. And what you are doing is rewarding every extinction burst, causing your dogs intensity to get higher and higher as time goes on.

So first things first, stop rewarding this behavior. No longer look, talk at, smile, twitch, walk towards, or ANYTHING that makes your dog think he is getting somewhere, when he displays this behavior.

on the side, you should have your wife spend more time with the dog. Walk him, feed him, play with him, train him etc. Let him build a bond with her so that being left by you isn't so traumatic.

[XinnKoda]

Thanks for the quick reply! My wife has been training with him in an attempt to build a better bond. Now here's my question. The second I open the door he calms right down. Now that he's calm, should I praise him? Or would that re-enforce him thinking that since I came inside it was because he was barking? Because then that would be re-enforcing bad behavior.

[4TheDawgies]

Originally Posted by XinnKoda

Thanks for the quick reply! My wife has been training with him in an attempt to build a better bond. Now here's my question. The second I open the door he calms right down. Now that he's calm, should I praise him? Or would that re-enforce him thinking that since I came inside it was because he was barking? Because then that would be re-enforcing bad behavior.

Well you definitely want to avoid him thinking the barking is what got you to enter the room. So if you could do something like make a loud noise to interrupt the barking for a second, and it stops. Then I would enter the room and lavishly reward and throw a treat in the kennel.

since you said he will bark for hours on end this makes things hard. But what you can do is set up the situation when you don't have to leave for a while. put him in kennel and close door like you are going to work. Then stand outside the door.
Dogs have to breathe, so at some point he will quiet down for a second. Even if he fully intended to begin again, make a point to still reward that silence. The more you reward the silence and close the door and ignore the barking the quicker he will understand how it works and become silent.

[MaggieRoseLee]

First of all, is the crate in the bedroom beside your wife's bed at night? That may stop the barking almost immediately and allow her to get a good nights sleep.

Other thing I'd be doing is upping the OFF leash exercise during the week. A tired puppy really is so much better behaved. Your wife able to do 'engagement' training with the pup? Be a huge help for them to bond:

Why Engagement is Important in Dog Training - YouTube

Why Engagement is Important in Dog Training - YouTube

Lindsey Sommer Working Engagement Training with Her Puppy - YouTube

Lindsey Sommer Working Engagement Training with Her Puppy - YouTube

Glory B (11 wks) and Bretta Lee (5 yrs) Wildhaus Hiking at Toms Ck (PA) - YouTube

Glory B (11 wks) and Bretta Lee (5 yrs) Wildhaus Hiking at Toms Ck (PA) - YouTube

[BowWowMeow]

Believe it or not, if he truly has SA then you are pushing things too fast in terms of counter conditioning. The first steps involve going through the ritual of leaving but not leaving. My Rafi had SA when I adopted him. I used the protocol layed out by Patricia McConnell in this little booklet:

http://www.amazon.com/Ill-Home-Soon-Separation-Anxiety/dp/1891767054

http://www.amazon.com/Ill-Home-Soon-Separation-Anxiety/dp/1891767054

I would recommend buying the book and following the protocol. Rafi is fine now when I leave.

[Samba]

Puppies at this age are very sad to be left alone. They are trying to adapt to life away from the pack and constant company they had with mum and littermates. Some cry more than others. If your wife is home, the pup will fare better with crate in the same room with her. The pup should have a good play romp beore being crated. Toys and chewies provided also. He won't be able to go very long without needing to be taken out to potty also.

[msvette2u]

To me it did not sound as if the puppy is even crated.

I'd get that puppy on a routine as far as potty time and crate time. If you don't have a crate get one now. Get some DAP (dog appeasing pheromone) and use that, and a blanket in the crate that is just the puppy's.

And...at 10 weeks, you've had him, what, 2 weeks? It seems odd your wife would want to get rid of him already, and sad, too.

Read up on crate training a puppy, and some puppy basics.

Puppies want to be with their pack, and if they aren't, it can be distressing for them, it's not a bad thing to crate, but realize they will be sad about it for a while until they realize it's not the worst thing in the world, and come to accept it.

[XinnKoda]

We got him when he was 6 weeks old. What are your thoughts about medication? We called our vet and they suggested Reconcile. So you think crate training is a good way to get him out of the separation anxiety mood?

[katieliz]

george, both you and your wife have to have patience. your little guy missed out on some crucial time with his mom and littermates if you got him at 6 weeks, which is too young. please get the mcconnell book. for your convenience and their safety and security, my feeling is that all puppies should be crate trained. i don't know what reconcile is but if it's a drug i'd sure try everything else before i tried that. without actually knowing what daily life is like where you are, it's pretty hard to offer accurate advice, but i do think it's kind of concerning that your wife (or you) would even be seriously thinking about "getting rid" of what is essentially just a baby. and a baby that was taken away from his mother too soon. i initially misread your post and thought he was a 10 MONTH old, but knowing that he's only ten weeks and you got him when he was six weeks...george, you just have to give him more time. do you mind if i ask you why he came to you so young, and if your wife was on board with you getting him? i'm not even sure if this is even technically separation anxiety in a baby like this. what is your little peanut's name? can you post a picture? again, please be patient...if you work through the issues with this puppy, i think you'll have an awesome dog. take care.