My GSD is dying...what to do?

[WendiGSD]

Wow, talk about timing! I have been putting off posting this, but came across this new topic, and have finally gotten the guts to do it.

On the 25th of June my beloved GSD Maggie went in to the vet have a tooth removed. I was in the shower when my 7 year old son came in and said "Maggie is really sick". My husband was on the phone with the vet. My dog has cancer. She has a tumor on her lower left jaw. The jaw bone is worn away so bad the vet was able to pull teeth out with her fingers. At this point she was given a couple of weeks, maybe a month.

On the 28th the results of the biopsy came back. The vet told me they believe it is either malignant oral melanoma, or fibrosarcoma (sp?). The area that is affected is so large surgery is out of the question. Chemo/radiation is a possiblity, but realistically it won't do much. The only thing we can do at this point is to keep her comfortable. The infection she has makes her smell like death. "Like a decaying body", as my husband put it (he's a cop, so truly does know what it smells like). She's been on antibiotics. Hopefully they can keep the infection under control for awhlie.

So, now I sit and wait. I apologize to Maggie everytime I see her. I sit here witih a black cloud hanging over me because I know my dog is dying a horrible death, and all I can do is wait. Wait for some sort of sign that it is time for her to go to the bridge. She sleeps alot. She is still eating. She still wags her tail while I am preparing her food, God bless her sweet soul. She still "cleans up" under my toddlers high chair. Food is her favorite thing, and she still enjoys it.

The vet mentioned that it will not be a case of us waking up in the morning to find that she has passed. Most likely it will be a matter of us bringing her in the be euthanized. I have decided that no matter what, I will be the one in the room with her. She has given me 11 years of her life, I owe it to her. I need to be there when she passes. It makes me sick to think about it. It wasn't supposed to happen this way.

When do I know it's time? What can I expect when I bring her to the vet for that last time? I want her cremated. How exactly does that work?

Any insight/advice would be GREATLY appreciated!!! I am having a very hard time dealing with this. I am also very sorry if I sound overly dramatic. I haven't posted here much, but needed to vent somehow.

Thanks so much!!!
~Wendy

[shilohsmom]

Oh Wendy, I'm so very sorry to know of what you must be going thru. Others will be able to help you more than I, but I just wanted to say your not alone and my heart goes out to you and your lovely dog.

[onyx'girl]

Wendy, I am sorry to hear about your girl. You can make a photo tribute of Maggie and post it. It is bittersweet to see the seniors and the life they have led. But you can remember all the great things she went thru with you in the 11 years you had her. It may make it easier to say goodbye. I feel that if the dog has lost their dignity, and is in pain then it is time. I am going to go thru this soon as well, with a 14 yr border/golden mix Clover and it will be so hard, but she has been happy and given us much happiness in return. Do you have anyone that can go with you for support when the time comes? I am lucky, that my DH will be there for us. Just let her know in the time you have left, how much she is loved, and you will know when it is time. Your vet will be able to help you with the cremation And some vets that have been w/ your dog their whole life will accomodate you as much as possible.

[flyinghayden]

I know exactly what you are going through. I have a 9 year lab/hound named Jazzabell, who is also dying of spleen and liver cancer. It is hard because I have her on meds that keep her eating, and sleeping in a normal way, yet in the back of my mind, I know that she has a timebomb ticking away in her. When she turns over for a belly rub, I feel this mass where her liver is, and her stomach feels big and weird. While there is a chance she will pass on in the night, I feel that I too will be making that final trip to the vet. So sorry, I wish I knew what to say.

[Skye'sMom]

So that you will know what will happen, talk to your vet now about how the euthanasia will be done. Make sure you are comfortable with all steps.

Some vets will come to your home for this. If you go the the clinic, ask if you can be scheduled at a time it is usually quiet. If you are like me, you may want time alone with her afterward - it is hard to leave them, even though you know they have moved into your heart.

It sounds like Maggie is still having some joys in her life. When the time comes she is not you will know it is time.

Take some pictures now. You will cherish them.

I am so sorry Maggie and her family are going through this. You are in a good place here. We care. Tell us all you want about Maggie and her place in your life.

I will be thinking of you - take care.

[kshort]

Wendy,
You are not being overly dramatic at all. It's a gut wrenching, heartbreaking thing to go through. Thinking about making that decision will rip you apart. I know because I was there just 10 weeks ago with my boy. But I can promise you that one of these days you will look into Maggie's eyes and she will tell you that it's time. Try to enjoy every single day you have with her. She just might surprise you. My sister's dog was diagnosed with cancer of the spleen nearly two years ago (he was 11). He passed in his sleep last Sunday at 13+.

Our vet came to the house and has for all of our animals. I know it's not always possible, but if there's a way, I believe it's easiest on the dog as they are in a safe and comfortable environment. Insist that the vet sedate first. Do not take "no" for an answer. The sedation puts them into a very deep sleep and they are not cognizant of what is going on. When you're ready, they can give the final shot which stops the heart. It is painless to them and they go to sleep within seconds.

My vet made a plaster pawprint for me. I can't tell you how much that meant. I know not all vets do it, so it's something you might want to do now while Maggie is doing fairly well -- kind of like doing a kid's handprint! Some people like to clip fur and keep it.

It's very hard for some people to stay with their companion, but as painful as it is, I could never let them pass without holding them and talking with them as they go to sleep.

Your vet can arrange for the cremation. They give you the option of purchasing a container or you can buy or make your own. All of my animals are cremated and here with me. It gives me great comfort to know that they're close.

I am so sorry you are faced with this and I, and many others here, know exactly what you're going through. You'll find many compassionate people on this forum and all you have to do is post and you'll find a lot of support. Let us know how things are going and give Maggie girl a big hug from me.

For all the joy you've given me,
for the glory days gone by
My best and final gift, My Love,
I grant you wings to fly
-- Author Unknown

[Shugmort]

Wendy, so sorry for you and Maggie. I too went through this only about 10 weeks ago, and yes you'll know when the time comes. The pain and frustration will become clear and you'll see it in Maggie's eyes. My vet brings you to a special room and allows you some final time together. As difficult as it is, I could not let my boy go alone, I stayed with him and held and talked to him until it was over. If you can, stay with her as she crosses the bridge, you will get some comfort knowing she's at peace.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[pupresq]

The vet clinic will take care of the cremation and the euthanasia should be a quick and peaceful process. I used to work for a mobile vet and we often went to people's homes to euthanize dying animals, after everything I see at the shelter, seeing these much loved and much mourned pets was terribly sad but also terribly beautiful. In the case of the two dogs I've had euthanized we actually went to the clinic but both were dogs who enjoyed an outing and I think they liked the attention. If either of them had been fearful or shy dogs, I definitely would have found some way for someone to come to our home.

In my Golden's case (end stage osteosarcoma) I took her through McDonald's first, she got a burger and chocolate chip cookies and I sat with her in her wagon (she couldn't walk at that point) and fed her pieces while we waited. I gave her a big bite of cookie when they put in the IV catheter and I don't think she ever noticed it, she was too busy licking her chops, which made me happy.

This might sound morbid, but I have a blanket that my Husky was lying on when she died and since then, I've used it to cushion the two other dogs we've had euthanized. It still gets laundered and everything so it's not like it smells like them but it's old and soft gives me something tangible that was close to them that I can hold.

Like other posters, we've kept all their ashes. I have their collars with each box. My BIL made a beautiful shadow box with his deceased dog's picture and collar which hangs over his desk. I thought that was a nice idea.

As far as knowing when is the right time, I found this the most difficult part of the entire process. People said I would "just know" but I found that I didn't. A good day would be followed by a bad one but then another good one. It wasn't clear to me. Even when Charlotte couldn't walk well on her own, we held her in a sling to go potty and took her for long rambles in her wagon which she seemed to enjoy. Her leg had been removed so she didn't seem to be in pain. For us the "moment" came the day I had to leave the house for 2 hours and came back to find that she'd gone poop on the floor but clearly tried to drag herself to the door to go out. I didn't care a thing about soiling the house but I realized how hard that was on her, when she "knew" she wasn't supposed to. I realized that the bad moments were starting to outnumber the good ones and she was slipping fast. I'm glad we didn't wait until she couldn't enjoy her cookies and burger. It felt like the right time.

In our Rottie's case it came when he seemed to be in pain and wasn't able to enjoy the things he used to. I felt like it was the right time but I worried a lot that I'd waited to long.

I think making that decision and deciding on the moment is probably the hardest decision we can make as dog owners.

But before that sad day, it's wonderful to spend time with them, to think of things they'll enjoy and let them break the rules they never got too before

Lots of pictures of her and of you with her. Paw prints and paw casts are also nice mementoes as others have mentioned. It seems sad and morbid sometimes when you're doing it but they're priceless later, and if you have other pets, you can do everybody and create display. It doesn't have to be about losing her it can be about celebrating the time you have now.

[shadow mum]

Wendy, I am so sorry that you are going through this. My boy Smoke died in February rather suddenly at home, so I didn't have to make the decision about the final vet trip. We had known he wasn't feeling well, and had a vet appointment on the Saturday. I got a telephone call at work of the Friday night to say that he'd gone to the bridge.

My vet was great though. We took Smoke to the office, and they arranged the cremation, took a cast of his pawprint etc. It is now in my bedroom with a photo and his collar.

Don't worry, Maggie will tell you when it's time...and will thank you for not letting her suffer. You've given her 11 years, and I'm sure they've been happy ones.

My thoughts are with you.

[WendiGSD]

First of all, thanks so much for the replies. It truly means so much to me!! I am so sorry to everyone that has lost a pet. Obviously dogs don't live forever. As Maggie has gotten older I knew the day would come. I guess I had hoped that when her time came it would be quick and painless.

I was completely blind-sided by this. I had taken her into the vet the week before because I knew something was wrong. Like I said, she smelled really bad. She also had a lump under her eye. I was told it most likely was and infected/impacted tooth that had to be removed. So, when I dropped her off on the 25th I figured the tooth would be removed, and all would be well.

My husband has been great through all of this. I trust that he will help me decide when it's time. He isn't quite as emotionally attached to Maggie, and will be able to think with his head, and not is heart if you know what I mean.

Maggie is my sweetheart. She sleeps next to my side of the bed every night. When I went to Florida two years ago with the kids she laid by the front door for the majority of the week. She has been so loyal to me. She was a royal PITA as a puppy, but turned out to be a wonderful dog. She has a few "quirks". She hates having her picture taken. She will literally run and hide if I bring the camera out. It's funny because years ago I took so many pictures of her my husband called her "The Princess Diana" of the dog world. Always being photographed I guess Maggie just got sick of it.

She looks so sad. I look into her eyes and I can tell something is different. It may be my imagination considering a month or so ago I had no clue. I don't know. Every once in awhile I think the vet may be wrong on the time frame. I am clueless at this point. Heck, I don't even know exactly what type of cancer she has for sure. The hardest part is being able to tell if she is in pain or not.

I'll just take it a day at a time. I have been mixing some yummy people food into her dog food. My husband told me to spoil her like crazy, so that's exactly what I plan on doing.

Sorry i'm rambling. Being able to write my feelings out has helped, as well as reading all of your reponses.

Time to get my human kids in bed...

Thanks so much!!!