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We don't have long

19K views 199 replies 82 participants last post by  Tristan and Loki 
#1 ·
I have been putting off writing this. Every time I go to start my hands start shaking and I start to cry.

It seems every time we start to make progress with Kaos' pain management, we just as quickly start to go backwards. Last night the vet switched his routine and we are giving it 2 weeks to test it out.
I am not hopeful as in my heart I truly believe we can not make him comfortable enough for me to feel good about.

He has been showing increased discomfort in all of his daily activities, even with his extensive med intake. He is also starting to get defensive when he thinks you are too close to his back end, this is showing me he is not even close to being comfortable. In the last 2 weeks my husband has had to help him stand up 4x. This is something I can not do on a daily basis since I did it two weeks ago and reaggravated my 2 herniated discs. Having reinjured myself I was given a pretty good wake up call to what it's like to have chronic pain, and this is also playing into our decision. I have always said the minute we can not control his pain, we have to let him go. We have decided to give the new scheduling 2 weeks and if it is not helping immensely we will be picking a date to let Kaos be at peace.

Logically I am 100% sure this is the right thing to do for him.....but it's killing me. He still wants to play, eat, drink, love.....but his body is not capable.
Also since he is getting more defensive, I do not want him to snap at someone "too close" and to have that be how he is remembered, does that make sense?

I have a couple questions for all of you who have been through this.
How did you prepare yourself mentally? Are there special things you did?, wish you had done after the fact?
Also with another dog in the house....Sherman is 11 months old and has never known a life here w/out Kaos. Did you start seperating them more beforehand, ie right now they have times of the day they go outside together, do you limit those, so your other dog gets used to being alone? In the house we already do crate/rotate due to our vet recommendation a couple months ago....but is there more we should be doing?

My kids have also never known a house without Kaos, so we have been preparing for this for awhile. We have discussed sometimes it is the best thing you can do for them, how it is the most loving thing. Both of them have friends who've had to do the same in the last couple months so we used those opportunities to discuss that while it was hard, it was very kind.

Sorry if this is rambled, I have been a wreck the last couple of days, and I am sure that isn't going to change anytime soon.

Thank you in advance for any input you can offer.
 
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#30 ·
You all are amazing and have made it feel not so lonely here. It is hard when I don't have a lot of "dog people" for friends. I swear they think I'm crazy. Like I told my husband last night, I am a stay at home mom so honestly in the last 10 years I have spent more time with Kaos then with my own husband.

Stosh you are right my husband is a keeper, I am very fortunate. Kaos was actually a gift from him. A gift I picked out and knew about:wub: Here are some pics when he was a pup, I know how you all love pup pics and to those of you kind enough to keep up with me on this you deserve it



 
#31 ·
May God give you strength and courage during this heartbreaking time. It is never easy to let them go, the pain will never go away but it will lesson with time.
 
#35 ·
Thank you, I hope so. We were very blessed to have him for almost 10 years.

Thank you for the puppy pics of Kaos. His pictures showed the promise of what a great boy he would be.May you and he have beautiful moments together and a peaceful journey. He will always be watching and trying to teach Mr Sherman Tank how to be a great GSD just like him.
Thank you so much, you are always so kind. Wasn't he a cutie? I'm afraid Sherman has a little too much Mastiff in him to be as good as Kaos:wub:

i've never raised a dog from a puppy so i'm ALWAYS amazed at how much they change from their puppy looks to their adult looks. he was an amazing looking baby. he grew to be a beauty. you've been very blessed to have spent so much time w/him. i know how you feel about being a hausfrau.

i've been a stay at home myself and now am pretty much house bound these last 15yrs, so my whole world is pretty much my dogs. it's a heartbreaker to have let one go. but they will never live long enough, no matter what we do. hmm, we always want more time. we love 'em so much.

dw
Isn't it crazy, he was about 14 weeks in that picture, hard to imagine he would grow into the 30 inch 115 lb montrosity:D that he is. As for the hausfrau...my husband always calls Kaos "sancho", it is spanish slang for other man:blush:

Aw, I am so sorry you and your family are going through this. It certainly is the bitter side of having these wonderful creatures sharing our lives, having to let them go. You are in my thoughts, and I hope you find the strength to get through these difficult times.
Thank you very much....why doesn't anyone tell you about this when you get that cute little puppy?.....I'd of done it anyway, who am I kidding?
 
#32 ·
Thank you for the puppy pics of Kaos. His pictures showed the promise of what a great boy he would be.May you and he have beautiful moments together and a peaceful journey. He will always be watching and trying to teach Mr Sherman Tank how to be a great GSD just like him.
 
#33 ·
i've never raised a dog from a puppy so i'm ALWAYS amazed at how much they change from their puppy looks to their adult looks. he was an amazing looking baby. he grew to be a beauty. you've been very blessed to have spent so much time w/him. i know how you feel about being a hausfrau.

i've been a stay at home myself and now am pretty much house bound these last 15yrs, so my whole world is pretty much my dogs. it's a heartbreaker to have let one go. but they will never live long enough, no matter what we do. hmm, we always want more time. we love 'em so much.

dw
 
#34 ·
Aw, I am so sorry you and your family are going through this. It certainly is the bitter side of having these wonderful creatures sharing our lives, having to let them go. You are in my thoughts, and I hope you find the strength to get through these difficult times.
 
#36 ·
your post was so touching and it's very clear how much your family loves Kaos. I'm on my first GSD and have not yet had to go through this, but i absolutely dread the day i have to. just reading your posts and the posts of others brought tears to my eyes...my heart is breaking for you. and it's true...forever wouldn't be long enough for our furry family members. your family and your baby boy are in my thoughts and prayers. remember the good times, feel your emotions and follow your heart. your boy knows you love him very much so have faith in yourself that you are doing the best for him.
 
#40 ·
your post was so touching and it's very clear how much your family loves Kaos. I'm on my first GSD and have not yet had to go through this, but i absolutely dread the day i have to. just reading your posts and the posts of others brought tears to my eyes...my heart is breaking for you. and it's true...forever wouldn't be long enough for our furry family members. your family and your baby boy are in my thoughts and prayers. remember the good times, feel your emotions and follow your heart. your boy knows you love him very much so have faith in yourself that you are doing the best for him.
Thank you.

I know many have already commented and I haven't had time to read everything, so I am sorry if some of this has already been said. If it has... just ignore my post.

First off, I want to say I am so sorry to hear this news as I've prayed so many times for him to pull through and was THRILLED to hear how well he was doing just the other week. If this treatment doesn't work though, In my opinion you are making the best decision for him!

I put my golden retriever to sleep on Feb. 5th 2011. She was fighting an infection and just when things got a little better, we found out she had cancer. We didn't have the heart to put her through treatment and/or surgery as she was old and weak. We knew what was best and let her tell us when. Well, "when" came a little earlier then we had hoped. Two days later the light in her eyes left and she gave up. That morning I had her PTS.

I'm going to be 100% honest.... It is HARD to do and so so painful emotionally for those that love them. There is no way to prepare for that. Absolutely the hardest signature I ever had to write. A year later, I am still a wreck when talking about her (I'm in tears just typing this out!). However, just knowing you gave your best friend the more wonderful gift of all... setting them free from all their aches and pains and letting them be at peace again.... that right there is enough to get you through it. It's hard, but it's the right thing to do when that time comes. Probably the only horrible truth of owning a pet.

We didn't separate our animals during that time. We didn't have a lot of time, but we didn't want to make anything different for either of them.... less stress on the dogs, especially Peaches. IMO, I wouldn't really change too much so he doesn't stress, keep things fairly normal around the house. After she passed, The two other goldens were depressed for a little while and were looking for her, but we just gave them a LOT of attention and love.... they are now (a year later) doing very well. Sherman I am sure will adjust, especially being just a puppy. Give him lots of love, and attention.... he'll get through it and adjust to being the only dog. Some dogs take badly to it, but as he is still very young, I am sure he will be fine.

As of anything I wish I could have changed.... Well, since it was so last minute and she was sooooo sick and weak, I couldn't do anything for her but immediately get her to the vet. If I could have had more time with her, I would have let her do all the things she loved before she passed on. Some treats she loved, see all the family again, go down by the lake again like old times, maybe a short walk at the park she grew up going to with me.... I wish I could have enjoyed those with her one last time. Even though we didn't get to do all that, I still think she left this earth at peace. She was in my lap the whole time while I told her how much I loved her. She had most the family there and our close friends that she adored. She went with so much love around her. That was the best gift we could ever give her. All I have to say is to enjoy the time you have left with him... if you both use every bit of that time, you will have no regrets.

With all that said... I DO pray and wish for this treatment to work. I would love nothing more but for him to be comfortable and enjoy more time on this earth with you and your family. If that doesn't happen, I know he will leave this earth one happy and extremely loved dog. He is very lucky to have a family like yours!

I wish the best for Kaos and your family. My thoughts and prayers are being sent your way. I really hope to hear about how much he's improved in 2 weeks!!

*Lots of hugs*
Thank you doesn't seem like enough.....We will enjoy every day indeed. We have decided to set the appt as I am less than optimistic we can get him to a pain level I'm comfortable with having him endure. He fell off the bottom two stairs today and the look in his eyes was chilling...:cry: he's ready so I need to be too. So glad no one is home right now, I am sobbing and look like a train wreck, Thank you again

I had a 120 pound lab that I rescued when he was about 9 because his owner died..He literally had a half of a brain because of cancer:( After I had him for about a year, he started to get a tumor in the same area. My other dog got used to having him around, so I went and got a golden retriever puppy. The Lab became the golden's "dad" and protector...Whenever the golden was scared he hid behind the lab:) I moved out of a second floor apt into a ground level apt so I could get the big boy out without killing myself. He started getting worse, I even got an easy lift harness so I could move him and not hurt myself-this worked for a while. One day I took him out for a walk and we were almost home, when he made an awful noise and just collapsed:( I couldn't move him, I laid on him crying rubbing his heart to get some kind of circulation..I believe he had a stroke, the next day I made an appointment and brought him in. I only had him two years, but I was an uncontrollable mess that couldn't be consoled. I think of him fondly and have many happy memories of him. They touch our lives in so many ways and anytime a person has to make this decision, I feel so bad, because its the hardest decision a person has to make. :(:( Good luck at this tough time and give him lots of hugs and kisses every day!!
I've thought of this day often but I didn't even come close to imagining all of the feelings it brings with it. Thank you.

How precious baby Kaos!
Wasn't that a cute little puppy face?
 
#37 ·
I have a couple questions for all of you who have been through this.
How did you prepare yourself mentally? Are there special things you did?, wish you had done after the fact?
Also with another dog in the house....Sherman is 11 months old and has never known a life here w/out Kaos. Did you start seperating them more beforehand, ie right now they have times of the day they go outside together, do you limit those, so your other dog gets used to being alone? In the house we already do crate/rotate due to our vet recommendation a couple months ago....but is there more we should be doing?
I know many have already commented and I haven't had time to read everything, so I am sorry if some of this has already been said. If it has... just ignore my post.

First off, I want to say I am so sorry to hear this news as I've prayed so many times for him to pull through and was THRILLED to hear how well he was doing just the other week. If this treatment doesn't work though, In my opinion you are making the best decision for him!

I put my golden retriever to sleep on Feb. 5th 2011. She was fighting an infection and just when things got a little better, we found out she had cancer. We didn't have the heart to put her through treatment and/or surgery as she was old and weak. We knew what was best and let her tell us when. Well, "when" came a little earlier then we had hoped. Two days later the light in her eyes left and she gave up. That morning I had her PTS.

I'm going to be 100% honest.... It is HARD to do and so so painful emotionally for those that love them. There is no way to prepare for that. Absolutely the hardest signature I ever had to write. A year later, I am still a wreck when talking about her (I'm in tears just typing this out!). However, just knowing you gave your best friend the more wonderful gift of all... setting them free from all their aches and pains and letting them be at peace again.... that right there is enough to get you through it. It's hard, but it's the right thing to do when that time comes. Probably the only horrible truth of owning a pet.

We didn't separate our animals during that time. We didn't have a lot of time, but we didn't want to make anything different for either of them.... less stress on the dogs, especially Peaches. IMO, I wouldn't really change too much so he doesn't stress, keep things fairly normal around the house. After she passed, The two other goldens were depressed for a little while and were looking for her, but we just gave them a LOT of attention and love.... they are now (a year later) doing very well. Sherman I am sure will adjust, especially being just a puppy. Give him lots of love, and attention.... he'll get through it and adjust to being the only dog. Some dogs take badly to it, but as he is still very young, I am sure he will be fine.

As of anything I wish I could have changed.... Well, since it was so last minute and she was sooooo sick and weak, I couldn't do anything for her but immediately get her to the vet. If I could have had more time with her, I would have let her do all the things she loved before she passed on. Some treats she loved, see all the family again, go down by the lake again like old times, maybe a short walk at the park she grew up going to with me.... I wish I could have enjoyed those with her one last time. Even though we didn't get to do all that, I still think she left this earth at peace. She was in my lap the whole time while I told her how much I loved her. She had most the family there and our close friends that she adored. She went with so much love around her. That was the best gift we could ever give her. All I have to say is to enjoy the time you have left with him... if you both use every bit of that time, you will have no regrets.

With all that said... I DO pray and wish for this treatment to work. I would love nothing more but for him to be comfortable and enjoy more time on this earth with you and your family. If that doesn't happen, I know he will leave this earth one happy and extremely loved dog. He is very lucky to have a family like yours!

I wish the best for Kaos and your family. My thoughts and prayers are being sent your way. I really hope to hear about how much he's improved in 2 weeks!!

*Lots of hugs*
 
#38 ·
I had a 120 pound lab that I rescued when he was about 9 because his owner died..He literally had a half of a brain because of cancer:( After I had him for about a year, he started to get a tumor in the same area. My other dog got used to having him around, so I went and got a golden retriever puppy. The Lab became the golden's "dad" and protector...Whenever the golden was scared he hid behind the lab:) I moved out of a second floor apt into a ground level apt so I could get the big boy out without killing myself. He started getting worse, I even got an easy lift harness so I could move him and not hurt myself-this worked for a while. One day I took him out for a walk and we were almost home, when he made an awful noise and just collapsed:( I couldn't move him, I laid on him crying rubbing his heart to get some kind of circulation..I believe he had a stroke, the next day I made an appointment and brought him in. I only had him two years, but I was an uncontrollable mess that couldn't be consoled. I think of him fondly and have many happy memories of him. They touch our lives in so many ways and anytime a person has to make this decision, I feel so bad, because its the hardest decision a person has to make. :(:( Good luck at this tough time and give him lots of hugs and kisses every day!!
 
#43 ·
When I know it helps others, I don't mind at all.

We sedated Peaches once we got to the clinic. If I had known BEFORE the appointment that this was possible, I may have done it before hand (with a more mild sedation) so she wasn't so stressed going into the clinic (she never liked going to the vets). Thankfully our clinic is very very caring and brought her to a room immediately as we got there (most clinics do this as far as I know). So she didn't have to be in the waiting room for more than a minute as we carried her in. When you do it is up to you, but I would definitely make sure it is done when you get into the room. The one they use then is very strong and only takes a moment as it's an injection. Once they are calm and relaxed, and you are ready... they do the final injection, which stops the heart. To see them breathe so easily, and in no pain.... god it's amazing and they are so relieved. Peaches was happy when she left this earth, and that right there is what gets me through this time without her. She came into this world happy and pain free, and she left this world happy and pain free.
 
#44 ·
I am so sorry. We just went through this in November with our Shadow. I spent the day with him doing the things he loved doing and was still able to do. I took him through the McDonalds drive-thru and for the first time ever he got his very own entire burger. He loved his vet so the trip there was not a stressful thing for him. The only thing I wish I had done differently was to get more pictures. Again I'm so sorry. :hug:

Cindy
 
#46 ·
Just enjoy the last hours you have with him, as he will enjoy being with you. No matter how strong you think you are,there is really no easy way to say goodbye to a loved one, other then to show them your love. Im sorry that we all have to deal with this, sometimes it just doesnt seem fair. Never second guess your decision to relieve his pain. You are doing the nicest thing a human can do for their animal in pain. .....Sorry for your future loss :rip: Kaos you will be missed
 
#47 ·
Candice,

I am really sorry you are going through this. The one problem with dogs is that they are so **** special that losing them is like ripping apart our very souls. Try to think of this as the last gift you can give to your boy, though.

I let myself feel awful about it for a while, and then I gather up and create a group of pictures from their life. Pictures when they were a puppy, and the things I did with them, and when I gather them together, I celebrate their life, and know that overall, they had a good life, however long it was. That and increasing the work and things I do with the other dogs usually helps me put in into a place in my heart that is manageable. Pretty soon, I can tell stories about them, and talk about them with family, and the memories are good, not painful.

Again, I am sorry, it is the awful part of having critters.
 
#48 ·
I am so very sorry that you are going through this. If there was a way I could take some of the pain away, I gladly would. Huge hugs to you and your family in this difficult time.

This will probably be jumbled, but here are some of the things I've found that help me get through the whole ordeal:

If you're unable or don't want to bury your dog, look for a pet cremation service, and arrange in advance for it, as you'll be overcome at the moment and possibly not able to deal with those kinds of arrangements. Some will even pick up your dog at the vet's office so that you don't have to try to drive any more yourself.

Let the kids decide whether they want to be there at the moment or not. If they do, then make sure you explain what will happen so they know what to expect. If they don't want to, then make sure they know that it is perfectly okay not to go. If they don't want to be IN the room, but want to see the body, allow it. They will need to have their own form of closure, and they will probably know how they can deal with it best. Trust them.

If possible, make it the first or last appointment of the day at the vet's office. If it's the first, you won't have to wait in misery in the waiting room, seeing the other pets coming and going. If it's the last, then you won't have to deal with walking out in tears through the other pet owners. Do any paperwork and payments up front so that you don't have to deal with it afterwards. It may be helpful to have Sherman with you, but not IN the room when it happens, so he can see the body as well. Perhaps he can wait in the car.

Spoil him completely rotten while you can. On the last day, give him any and all things he normally cannot have - if he loves ice cream and chocolate, let him have it. Feed him hot dogs or other "horrible" foods that he will love, but that is bad for him otherwise. It might be worth it to sedate him (pill in food) more easily this way if you think he will be upset at going to the vet's office. However, if he normally enjoys the vet, then I wouldn't go with sedation, so that he can be "himself" when he goes in.

Tell him that he has your permission to go, and how much you love him. If you're going to be in the room with him, then make sure you are telling him how wonderful he is right up until the end and how happy he has made you. Don't be afraid of him seeing you cry, he will understand. Don't think it's bad if he sees you grieving, he knows more than you think.

That's all I can think of right now, especially since I've used up the rest of my Kleenix, and I need to go hug my critters and bawl on them. I hate that you're going through this, that you're having this pain, it is a pretty awful thing to deal with. There's just one more thing, and it's a beautiful writing about the three most memorable days of your pet's life.
A Living Love
If you ever love an animal, there are three days in your life you will always remember . . .
The first is a day, blessed with happiness, when you bring home your young new friend. You may have spent weeks deciding on a breed. You may have asked numerous opinions of many vets, or done long research in finding a breeder. Or, perhaps in a fleeting moment, you may have just chosen that silly looking mutt in a shelter -- simply because something in its eyes reached your heart. But when you bring that chosen pet home, and watch it explore, and claim its special place in your hall or front room -- and when you feel it brush against you for the first time -- it instills a feeling of pure love you will carry with you through the many years to come.

The second day will occur eight or nine or ten years later. It will be a day like any other. Routine and unexceptional. But, for a surprising instant, you will look at your longtime friend and see age where you once saw youth. You will see slow deliberate steps where you once saw energy. And you will see sleep when you once saw activity. So you will begin to adjust your friend's diet -- and you may add a pill or two to her food. And you may feel a growing fear deep within yourself, which bodes of a coming emptiness. And you will feel this uneasy feeling, on and off, until the third day finally arrives.

And on this day -- if your friend and whatever higher being you believe in have not decided for you, then you will be faced with making a decision of your own -- on behalf of your lifelong friend, and with the guidance of your own deepest Spirit. But whichever way your friend eventually leaves you -- you will feel as long as a single star in the dark night.
If you are wise, you will let the tears flow as freely and as often as they must. And if you are typical, you will find that not many in your circle of family or friends will be able to understand your grief, or comfort you.

But if you are true to the love of the pet you cherished through the many joy-filled years, you may find that a soul -- a bit smaller in size than your own -- seems to walk with you, at times, during the lonely days to come.
And at moments when you least expect anything out of the ordinary to happen, you may feel something brush against your leg -- very very lightly.

And looking down at the place where your dear, perhaps dearest, friend used to lie -- you will remember those three significant days. The memory will most likely to be painful, and leave an ache in your heart--
-
As time passes the ache will come and go as if it has a life of its own. You will both reject it and embrace it, and it may confuse you. If you reject it, it will depress you. If you embrace it, it will deepen you. Either way, it will still be an ache.

But there will be, I assure you, a fourth day when -- along with the memory of your pet -- and piercing through the heaviness in your heart -- there will come a realization that belongs only to you. It will be as unique and strong as our relationship with each animal we have loved, and lost. This realization takes the form of a Living Love -- like the heavenly scent of a rose that remains after the petals have wilted, this Love will remain and grow -- and be there for us to remember. It is a love we have earned. It is the legacy our pets leave us when they go. And it is a gift we may keep with us as long as we live. It is a Love which is ours alone. And until we ourselves leave, perhaps to join our Beloved Pets -- it is a Love we will always possess.

~~by Martin Scot Kosins
 
#50 ·
My husband just emailed this to me.....not sure where he found it, but it is lovely.
Thought all of you who have been through this or are going through it, might appreciate it


From a Grateful Dog
You're giving me a special gift,

So sorrowfully endowed,
And through these last few cherished days,
Your courage makes me proud.
But really, love is knowing
When your best friend is in pain,
And understanding earthly acts
Will only be in vain.
So looking deep into your eyes,
Beyond, into your soul,
I see in you the magic that will
Once more make me whole.
The strength that you possess,
Is why I look to you today,
To do this thing that must be done,
For it's the only way.
That strength is why I've followed you,
And chose you as my friend,
And why I've loved you all these years...
My partner till the end.
Please, understand just what this gift
You're giving, means to me,
It gives me back the strength I've lost,
And all my dignity.
You take a stand on my behalf,
For that is what friends do.
And know that what you do is right,
For I believe it, too.
So one last time, I breathe your scent,
And through your hand I feel,
The courage that's within you,
To grant me this appeal.
Cut the leash that holds me here,
Dear friend, and let me run,
Once more a strong and steady dog,
My pain and struggle done.
And don't despair my passing,
For I won't be far away,
Forever here, within your heart,
And memory I'll stay.
I'll be there watching over you,
Your ever-faithful friend,
... a young dog once again.
 
#51 ·
My husband just emailed this to me.....not sure where he found it, but it is lovely.
Thought all of you who have been through this or are going through it, might appreciate it


From a Grateful Dog
You're giving me a special gift,
So sorrowfully endowed,
And through these last few cherished days,
Your courage makes me proud.
But really, love is knowing
When your best friend is in pain,
And understanding earthly acts
Will only be in vain.
So looking deep into your eyes,
Beyond, into your soul,
I see in you the magic that will
Once more make me whole.
The strength that you possess,
Is why I look to you today,
To do this thing that must be done,
For it's the only way.
That strength is why I've followed you,
And chose you as my friend,
And why I've loved you all these years...
My partner till the end.
Please, understand just what this gift
You're giving, means to me,
It gives me back the strength I've lost,
And all my dignity.
You take a stand on my behalf,
For that is what friends do.
And know that what you do is right,
For I believe it, too.
So one last time, I breathe your scent,
And through your hand I feel,
The courage that's within you,
To grant me this appeal.
Cut the leash that holds me here,
Dear friend, and let me run,
Once more a strong and steady dog,
My pain and struggle done.
And don't despair my passing,
For I won't be far away,
Forever here, within your heart,
And memory I'll stay.
I'll be there watching over you,
Your ever-faithful friend,
... a young dog once again.
This is beautiful! :cry:
 
#52 ·
I am soooo sorry you are having to make this decision! It is definitely the most difficult one we ever make, after so many years of happiness and pure unadulterated love.

In October '08 I had to make the same decision for my Miss Lizzy. She could not take more than a few steps without falling over, and getting her back up was extremely difficult. Not only did she have severe HD and arthritis, but her eyes were also cloudy and her vision was not the best. She still had the desire to play- frisbee was her most favorite thing in the world. But she could not walk let alone run to catch her frisbee. She struggled to get up after laying down.

Her last day was supposed to be filled with her and I spending the day snuggling, letting her eat everything she loved so much, especially spaghetti, and cherishing our last few hours. A dear friend of mine was to come over to help me get her loaded up for the final trip to the vet. When he arrived, he was 4 hours early. He had known her from the day I brought her home, and she was 10 years old. He was far more emotional than I was and sat here for those 4 hours crying his eyes out. He was inconsolable.

At one point she was laying at his feet and he was uncontrollably rubbing his foot against her back & hips. All I could think was that is where the arthritis was and her hips were so bad, it had to be painful to have him doing that, not that she would ever grumble. I finally had to ask him to stop.

When it came time to load her up, we were supposed to take his car as it would be easier on her than my truck and at the last minute, he bailed on me. Said he couldn't drive her to her death. He did help me get her into my truck, but he was so distraught that he couldn't close the gate or even my front door. So once she was loaded up, I had to go back to close the door and gate. When I came back out to take her to the vet, he was still sitting in his car, parked behind my truck. I had to go ask him to move so I could go!

So in the long run, I did not get to do the spaghetti, or snuggle or any of our special things, because he was so distraught. I should have asked him to leave so we could have those last few precious hours together. Had I known he was going to bail at the last minute, I would have.

I guess the moral of my story is to savor every minute you have with Kaos.

Again, I am truly sorry you are faced with making this decision. {{{hugs}}}
 
#54 ·
Wow, that's all I can say about From A Grateful Dog. Wow.
I saved it in my documents. Just beautiful.

It's been almost five years and I finally found a basic picture of Loki and the story behind it made me laugh.
 
#55 ·
I am so so sorry. I don't have any answers about how to prepare the children. We lost Old Bitch after a long battle with cancer. We had the time to prepare the children and they still cry for her. Beast went so suddenly and they are a mess from it. My daughter insists that everything that made our home good died with him:( My heart goes out to you all. Hugs from us to you.
 
#58 ·
Thank you:wub: I woke up in a panic thinking, what was I thinking yesterday..it's not time. Then I went downstairs where he was sleeping, he wouldn't get up to go out, had to bribe him to get up for breakfast, he immediately laid back down and I had to bribe him again to get him out to potty....I knew I made the right decision yesterday...He's just lost his zest:cry: I had a long talk with the vet today about final preperations and decided on two dates which I have to get my husbands input on when he would be most available.
I am doing better overall, I am more comfortable with my decision, so there has been *less* crying. Although I feel like a walking train wreck. Our vet said they don't usually presedate, so I talked to about 5 of my friends who had been through this to get their experience and left all of them in tears including my grown, tattooed tough looking motorcycle riding neighbor man. That about sums it up:(
 
#59 ·
I am glad to hear you are feeling better. Its so hard of a decision. But when you see them unable to do anything without the pain know it is the only and kind thing to do. I sat with ROck outside in the grass while my husband stood next to us. I held his head in my lap telling him its ok. Crying my eyes out, I couldn't leave him. But knew he was free. Hang in there.
 
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