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Old 12-09-2009, 12:56 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Saying goodbye...

In just a few weeks time (Chrismtas) my old girl Beau will be coming to stay with me for a week with the rest of my family for the holidays.

Lately she has been having some issues with her bowels, bladder and has been slowing down quite a bit.

She will be 13 years old March 8th.

My Dad and Grandfather (where she resides) says they don't think we will see another Christmas with her and that they think the time is near.

Other than the potty issues, she does have a low grade heart murmur but overall has been a VERY healthy girl.

I feel like this will be the last time I will get to see her and spend time with her. It is making me sad, I don't want to spend the whole week with her being upset. I want to spoil her, have fun with her and just be with her in the 'now'.

She lives 3 hours from me (I am away at school) so it's not like I can just head over to my parents to see her when she worsens.

How do you 'know' this could be the last moments with a part of your own heart and still manage to be sane? I know this sounds ridiculous (maybe not to those on this forum) but my girl is my whole heart, she is definitely the reason why I feel in love with the breed.
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Old 12-09-2009, 01:23 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Saying goodbye...

I am sorry that is tough
when you see her just make it the best time ever
Don't be sad enjoy every moment
she will always be with you!!

It is still a tough pill to swallow
heart goes out to you
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Old 12-09-2009, 01:35 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Saying goodbye...

That's really tough. Have fun with her, spoil her, give her lots of hugs and kisses.
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Old 12-09-2009, 03:14 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Saying goodbye...

No doubt this is going to be an emontionally difficult time for you. You've got a great question though...how do you know this is likely your last times together (feel that sadness) and yet enjoy yourself and the time you do have.

I'd say try to do things that might make you laugh...maybe take pics with her with a scarf or hat and get her all prettied up. Try to smile as much as possible. If you can take her to the drive thru's in town for ice cream or a hamburger you might both enjoy that. If your having fun drive thru a second time.

Interact with her as much as you can, hold her, dance with her, tell her stories of when she was a puppy, cry and laugh. Make salt dough ornaments of her paw prints (1 cup flour, 1 cup salt, 1/2 cup water). Do you have a photo album/scrapbook you can sit and share with her? Make an award for being the worlds greatest dog and give it to her. Cherish every moment and take lots of pictures.

Groom her and save the hair. There are places you can send it that will make special items of it. Watch Holiday movies with treats you can both share together.

Have as much fun as you can and cry all you want, its a special time and she's there to share it with you.

Hugs
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Old 12-09-2009, 05:30 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Saying goodbye...

Elizabeth, you don't know.

But those of us with young dogs don't know either. So we should cherish every sweet moment we can. Your girl may surprise you. My senior surprised me again and again.

Take lots of photos. Ask your family to take lots of photos of the two of you together. I would build on Rosa's suggestion and actually clip some fur (where it's not too noticeable) so that you have a beautiful section of her fur to save. Years from now, you're going to cherish being able to see her coat the way you remember it. (Although I'm sure you will also remember loose clumps of fur like you would get from a brush).

Grooming her is a lovely idea. She'll likely enjoy it, and it's a great way to spend quiet time together. If she can go for a short walk (even if it's just on to the porch), do so, and take more photos. If she can't, just take her to a sunny window.

I used to talk to Zamboni and tell her all the stories about all of the wonderful and crazy things we did together. We had so many stories and I wanted to share them with her. I'm certain that on some level, she remembered. If she didn't remember the exact events, she knew by listening to the tone of my voice and my facial expressions, that what we shared was deeper and more meaningful than most dogs and humans ever have the opportunity to experience.

She'd look in my eyes and grin at me, then she'd look away peacefully. Then she'd look at me again and lean up against me to be petted in her favorite spots. After I was done story telling for an afternoon, she fell peacefully asleep and then I could watch her dream -- eyes fluttering, feet wiggling. I didn't know, but I hoped that she was dreaming of our wild adventures together.

I let my girl set the pace. If she wanted to do something, we did. If not, we just snuggled in a blanket and talked. I never knew when her end would come, but having the opportunity to say goodbye is a gift. We don't really realize it until after the fact. But once you've been able to tell someone you love how much you love them before they go, no one can ever take away from you.

You will stay sane. It will be hard. You may have more than one opportunity to say goodbye. Or, this may be it. But this is a gift. Embrace it fully. Cherish every minute. Tell her you love her. She knows it already, but tell her anyhow. Take photos. If you want to get a casting of her pawprint (craft stores have kits), do that too. If you have any ideas to commemorate your girl, her life, and the memories you've made together, do it while you're there. It's not ridiculous to grieve someone you've loved deeply for years. And anything reasonable that you can do to commemorate that love is worthwhile
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Old 12-09-2009, 07:01 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Saying goodbye...

I had one dog die suddenly and one dog not suddenly. The one who I had time with didn't take the physical tole on me that the shock of the sudden death did.You spoil them and tell them a million times that you love them The old dogs really understand every word.Your old dog will appreciate the admiration and will probably shock you and be around next year!
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Old 12-10-2009, 08:37 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Saying goodbye...

Thanks everyone for the wonderful posts. It means more than you know.

I haven't seen her since the summer time so being able to 'assess' her health and vitality myself will make it easier in knowing what to expect I think.

I have went out and purchased the cast making stuff and plan on doing a cast of her paw print (and one of the buttheads' as well.. lol), I really like this idea.

I will forsure take a million photo's of her and will post some of them here.

Thank you again for your words.. it means so much.
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Wild Winds Zephyr "Zefra" (2011-04-15)

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