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Thread: Help...inconsistent training methods between spouses. Reply to Thread
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  Topic Review (Newest First)
04-03-2014 06:25 PM

In that thread "who pets my puppy or dog" same deal you sit the rules. Puppies are crazy but you can still expect a stay or sit. Shoot for it at any rate.

You have to set limits, if he "expects" to be greeted with gusto by "everyone" he sees that's going to be a problem also!

After I got Rocky's people issue fixed I've relaxed somewhat but still careful with kids. But I got rolled by a 12 yr old? I told him "NO" he asked why not?? I was stunned and did not really have an answer! I really couldn't say "he"s in training" any more.
So I let him pet Rocky and Rocky was fine. When I was concerned about him biting the crap out of people I had to "grow a pair" as it were.

Apparently now that "the people issues" is over my "pair" have kinda shrunk!

But back to your topic if you truly want to send this dog on his way, then the "dual training" has to stop! If the dog is going to be your pet fine, other wise your husband is sitting him up for failure.
04-03-2014 01:26 PM
Gwenhwyfair Ugh yeah the leash walking thing, that would get to me.....

I have a command for loose leash walking but when hubs walks the dogs he just lets them pull, he doesn't try to correct. So they know with him they can pull, with me not.....
04-03-2014 01:21 PM
horsdancr2000 I have high expectations too. My hubby let's the dog get away with more than I ever would. Some of his training methods are questionable. For instance when he first took Boris for a walk ( more like Boris took him for a drag) his way of getting the dog to heel was to let him get all the way out to the end of the lead and then jerk on the lead like he was trying to get a kink out of a hose. It looked painful and ridiculas. My poor baby looked like a yoyo. Then I took him out with a bag of treats and went slow/fast lots of direction changes/sits and lots of rewards. He does pretty good now. SuperG did you alpha roll your wife? Lol. If I did that to my hubby I think he would think I was initiating something else.

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04-03-2014 01:15 PM
Gwenhwyfair LOL!! Getting the list of commands reminds me...When I started basic training with hubs little Aussie I asked him what commands would you like to use. He told me. I used the commands he wanted for his dog. What happens ...I catch him outside playing with her using different commands at different times throughout their playtime. Oh well. In this case it's his dog, she's great and he's not going to compete with her in OB or anything of that nature. She minds me very well so it all works out.

With my two GSDs he doesn't "train" them. He just helps take care of them using what ever commands he wants. They know the routine so usually commands aren't needed and I don't care because I train with German commands and I didn't even try to get hubs on board with it. So he can futz around with them in the backyard and say whatever he wants but he doesn't affect my training because he doesn't use my commands which I've worked on and reinforced.

So.....if you can't get consistently on the same page my suggestion is to just pare it down to the important safety things like recall, keep gates closed, no door dashing that you two will be consistent on. Then you take the reins on the training, use commands in another language (doesn't matter which) so your commands are clear and consistent. Then just kick back and and let him have his relationship with the dog. More often then not, training the other human is just an exercise in frustration.

It can actually be amusing at times.
04-03-2014 12:58 PM
SuperG I have somewhat the same situation at times but more focused on the expectations of command, control and execution. I have much higher expectations of my dog's performance than my wife's expectations...which has made me wonder if my efforts are being somewhat diluted by my wife's more forgiving expectations of the dog's performance. The thread is located here

Much of the advice given by others was beneficial especially regarding your question " Will my hubby confuse the dog by suddenly changing the meanings if commands?".

I have also found that my use of hand signals tempers the problem you might be experiencing regarding two different verbal commands for the same action i.e. "drop" and "out". I strive to train the dog primarily with hand signals versus verbal commands once the dog has associated the others can say whatever they choose and it does not dilute my hand signals even if it is for the same desired result. I would think it should be very easy for the two of you to sync up on the exact same hand signals regardless of whatever verbal command accompanies the hand signal if any at all.

Dogs are smart and obviously many breeds including a GSD are very smart. With that in mind, your dog will soon learn ( if not already ) who means what they say. My wife "hopes" the dog will comply to her request while our dog knows I mean what I say because I don't "hope"...I expect, plain and simple. Our dog's understanding of the differences between the two of us is simply that...we are two different humans with different expectations...and the dog absolutely knows this. Yes, I appreciate the frustrations which can be created by two individuals who are not on the exact same page when it comes to training the same dog but it is not something that is a deal breaker as far as the dog's education goes....but of course I would prefer, all those involved in a dog's training to be on the same wavelength.

"Should I be concerned about my hubby imitating play biting?"....I'm guilty of the same charge. When I choose to let the dog blow some steam off at times I have no compunctions whatsoever if we romp and she uses her jaws in a playful manner. However, when she used to get a bit more "playful" than my idea of fun...I would simply disengage the exchange. Let's face it, the set of tools a GSD has is much more formidable than some of us give them credit I think the exercise all on it's own has value as the play biting can be taught to only reach a certain level which in turn creates a bite inhibition which is acceptable for playtime. My pooch like our others in the past, has figured out it prolongs roughhousing if she gingerly grabs hold of a loose sleeve or pant leg than using a tad bit too much bite pressure on a forearm...needless to say, a few of my sweatshirts have really long arms on them from her fun time. Granted, this type of interaction of roughhousing is my choice and most likely not the choice for all. However, when I am on the ground letting her have the upper hand ( in a toned down fashion ) and she has my sweatshirt sleeve in her jaws tugging away.....I do wonder what the neighbors might be thinking...ahhh but who cares.

Oh, by the pooch is 18 months as well and it seems like a magical time as she is truly coming on line and now has such a focus on's truly amazing how quickly they learn at this age.

04-03-2014 12:47 PM
Blanketback Make life easier on yourself - get your DH to list the commands that he'll be consistent with and just go with that
04-03-2014 12:44 PM
horsdancr2000 I'll put it next to the honey do

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04-03-2014 12:39 PM
mego There isnt a book of ""proper commands"" in my opinion. i could teach my dog to sit every time I said the word potato. you guys just need to communicate with eachother and get on the same page. Maybe sit down and write out the commands that you guys want to use and tape it to the fridge.
04-03-2014 12:36 PM
horsdancr2000 Thanks again all. I really appreciate the input. It is very frustrating. My hubby gets all but hurt/angry because I point it out. I'm not sure how to bring it up without him getting mad at me. What's a good book that spells out the proper commands? Maybe if he reads it the light bulb will turn on.

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04-03-2014 12:33 PM
mego the words thing can be fixed. I think the dog gets the idea that out from a toy means a different thing when you point and say "get out". Even if you add get they can probably tell. Aus vs out if you want.
Also dogs can understand two different command words for one action so as long as you spend time with each word 'look at me' and 'watch me', you'll eventually get the same result. My dog knows "fuss" (I can't make that german letter on this comp) and "with me" for heel. One's casual, one I want her focusing.

""and"working" with him very sporadically 1 or 2 times a week""
I personally agree that training should be more sporadic and random vs on a set schedule. if you train every day at 1 o clock it's a boring routine. If your dog never knows when to expect training it becomes more fun.

as far as roughhousing and play biting, I play with my dog rough. She loves to lay on her back and kick and nip at me and she doesn't try that game with other people. If your dog overgeneralizes you just teach a gentle command. When mine gets too rough I just say "HEY" in a sharp voice and end the game for a minute or two and she calms down. Sometimes if I can tell she's playful I'll just walk up and shove her lightly and it's game on lol. As long as you teach rules and when it stops.
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