|08-22-2013 01:17 PM|
And like the sand in an hour glass.....
Howdy from Idaho!
|08-22-2013 12:45 PM|
|Kayos and Havoc||
OP, thanks for giving more detail. Since you have spoken with and somewhat friended the lady that owns the dog that your dog is sniffing, I would say you ar not doing anything wrong.
In the dogs mind (the reactive barker from the other yard) anything he or she can see is in his or her domain. That is a dog. I would imagine many dogs pass by that yard and cause the dog to bark, but you stopped, the owner saw you and challenged you. She may not realize that you only pass by every now and then.
I imagine her dog's barking may upset her and you were her available target.
I still don't let my dogs sniff others through fences and don't advise it but you seem to have tacit permission and your dog and the friendly dog are okay with it. I think if you want to continue doing that you might consider breaking it off as soon as you see the unfriendly neighbor dog get agitated.
There really is nothing you can say that won't upset the person more. I would just move on when you see him start to react.
|08-22-2013 11:33 AM|
I think GSDLearner said she has chatted with the dog's owner in the past but you're right, when the other neighbor got upset my understanding was no one was present, initially.
|08-22-2013 11:27 AM|
|08-22-2013 11:09 AM|
I don't know how well they know each other. I *gathered* they chit chat occasionally at the fence but if they are better friends then why not meet and walk their dogs together in designated areas in the park?
On a more technical note - peaceful enjoyment of property isn't limited by physical boundaries, hence you can call the police if a neighbor is playing loud music or has dog which is barking all the time even though you aren't physically on their property. It could also be considered harassment if GSDlearner gets close enough to get in a verbal argument with the lady. If the lady is standing on her property she gets more consideration....
Another point is I'm giving the other lady the benefit of the doubt because we don't know her side of the story. Her dog may be a rescue with some behavioural issues, she may have had people teasing her dog, she may just be nervous of strangers approaching closely to the private backyards because of privacy/safety.
We don't know these details and to be honest, my reaction would be to keep away from this lady's back yard because technically I, as a stranger, encroaching or possibly crossing onto a private easement to access the backyards, there is more *potential* for me being in the wrong. It's just not worth the hassle.
If GSDlearner wants to be friends with the other lady she can 1) try to talk to the lady who is upset as I suggested earlier 2) exchange phone numbers and arrange meet ups with the lady she chats with and they can enjoy walks in the park together.
I've had people cross boundaries with me/my property and feel strongly about respecting people's privacy and property. Call me conservative on that point. It's just not a battle I would pick.
Good mornin' btw.
|08-22-2013 10:57 AM|
On one hand I can see that, but if I am talking to a friend, someone what wants me talking to them at their fence and I'm not at the neighbors fence, I'm not going to stop talking to my friend just because someone is upset. I'm not one for changing my life because it upsets someone. Maybe if she is right there by that fence to, I could see, otherwise it's no hassle for me, I'd just ignore them. She needs to take responsibility for her own dog barking. Personal responsibility isn't a punishment. In this case IMO its on the woman with the dog barking. The OP is doing nothing wrong and shouldn't be punished for it. I see it the same way when I dealt with my sister. I didn't give into her demands just because she said she would cut herself. If we gave it to everyones demands because something upset them, no one would be able to do anything.
The OP enjoys talking to this woman, she shouldn't be punished for that because someone is upset.
It does make me wonder how much that neighbor complains about to the woman who does live next to her. I'd be putting up a big 'ol fence in between her house and mine, lol.
|08-22-2013 10:09 AM|
No way of knowing without looking at plats (which are public record)...but really IMO it's just better to enjoy the park and leave people be, it's not worth the hassle.
|08-22-2013 09:52 AM|
What Sue said....
Leave her alone. Most of the people on this board have given you that advice, ignore her, stay away from the private backyard(s), don't escalate and various versions of that. The reason is there is likely nothing to be gained and far more potential negatives to bothering/arguing with someone who is standing on their private property.
IF you go down near enough to her fence to engage in some sort of verbal altercation, which is what 'snappy comebacks' often lead to (human nature 101) then you are indeed the one instigating a confrontation.
We've only gotten one small slice of this story, yours.
As to your question, I'm sorry but I'm going to be blunt, it's a silly question as you seek to justify your actions/reaction to this lady. I simply find it hard to believe that her dog is that obnoxious as to limit access to the park that severely and I'm sure of that (because I go to a park with similar situations/private property/barking dogs) I and the others walking by just keep on walking and ignore the barking dog in the backyard. As long as you are on designated walk ways/green spaces you are free to enjoy the park, her dog is not actually controlling the space he's ...just....barking, like your dog was doing.
We don't know anything about this lady or her dog. She is on her property and not breaking any laws.
Leave her alone.
Else....go there with the snappy comebacks a couple of people have supplied and let us know how that works out. Usually it'll just piss people off more, start a real shouting match, result in a call to the police or even damage the relationship she has with her neighbor whom you visit with. Many different negative outcomes given, again, basic human nature 101.
Maybe, if you insist on getting near her fence and want to be friends with her neighbor you could try calming her down by validating her concerns
"I'm sorry, I don't mean to bother you, I enjoy visiting this dog. Has something bad happened that makes you feel worried?" MAYBE she'll calm down and be able to share what's really bothering her and then she'll feel more trusting of your presence. Which is sort of what Saphire was suggesting but putting the responsibility of reaching out on you, which is fair since YOU are the one approaching (and possibly crossing onto) private property. If she still reacts badly then at least you tried to be kind AND then.....
Leave her alone, she is on her property and she is not breaking any laws where as you *may* be, the potential is greater that you would be in the wrong. There is no justification for aggravating this person.
|08-22-2013 01:17 AM|
Don't have any comebacks for you, I'd probably just ignore the lady and ignore her dog. Its not my issue if she can't control her dog. As someone said, her property ends at her fence. If the lady you are talking to has no issues with you being there, and you are at HER fence and not this other ladies fence then I would just leave her be.
My guess is she is just looking for something to complain about and if its not you, then it'll be someone else, or something else. It sounds more like she wants to blame other people for her lack of training.
|08-22-2013 12:39 AM|
|Beckch||we had a chain link fence that backed up to an alley and there was an older gentleman who walked his adult GSD by every day and would stop and say hi to my dogs (9 yr old Golden and GSD puppy) all spring and summer long. I know he had the best intentions, but he would get my puppy all excited (and his dog would bark too) and then give him treats when he was hyper, barking and jumping at the fence. I tried to explain to him that giving the puppy a treat when he is in this state of mind is only rewarding unwanted behavior but his response was to "let him be a dog." I know he means well, but I'm really trying hard to train my dog not to jump on people as a greeting so it's frustrating. We ended up getting a 6 ft privacy fence installed though Not because of him - we had planned on this for over a year, but whew! hee hee.|
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