|06-12-2014 09:48 PM|
I get this.
Living with Eva (rip) was....so difficult. She couldn't be trusted around children, other dogs, cats other than our cat, men, even some women. "Luckily," when she was anxious she didn't bark or howl (paced endlessly, always counter clockwise), but still, as you can imagine, as an apartment-dweller, her issues were very difficult to manage. (Think: walks at 1am, 4am, choosing a job and college based on ability to take her out at "off" times, etc.) Absolutely worth it, though, for every day we had together.
I can't add anything to the advice you've already been given. I just wanted to say that I have been there. I remember being reduced to tears a few times when my management tactics came gut-wrenchingly close to failing, and feeling completely hopeless about ever getting into the perfect home for her.
Thing is... for Zelda, wherever she is with you is her perfect home. I know, I know; it's not a perfect environment, and really, you are the one shouldering the burden here, not Zelda. That's hard to reconcile mentally and emotionally; it's psychological discord - on the one hand, she brings you so much joy; on the other, she brings you so much stress and so many challenges.
Keep being honest with yourself, keep venting, keep being open... keep enjoying your walks in the backcountry and your time together, and keep a training journal/log so that you can see the small improvements she makes - it will give you hope and keep you motivated. Keep pushing through at work. Over the years, I have noticed that "stick-to-it-iveness" is what propels people towards success - combined, of course, with making the most of contacts and credentials.
You can do this One day at a time!
|06-11-2014 11:25 PM|
|VTGirlT||Thanks for all the encouragement and suggestions guys! You really are all the best!|
|06-11-2014 01:29 PM|
For discouraging unwanted alerts (aka barking) -
Leave a TV or radio on - or both.
Get an "environmental" or sound canceling "radio." These mask all sorts of sounds (like toilets flushing in the next unit of a hotel/motel, car doors closing outside etc.)
|06-11-2014 01:24 PM|
Some of the pros said they do it all the time. I never had the need with my dogs but I did get a chance to try at a rescued day! I was impressed with the change in the demeanour of the dog fear issues!
And add this to that:
A Great Small And Lightweight Nylon Mesh Muzzle
You have friends with cats tell them what you want to work on muzzle the dog and basically sit on the dog! Two for one!
And I always add this one:
So there you go!
Those things alone may fix the bark problem? It will take time. And there is always a bark collar.
|06-11-2014 11:05 AM|
I think the OP's main problem seems to be that the dog barks when she's not home. There have been some really good suggestions but until she can leave the dog alone and not risk getting kicked out of her existing place, she is rather stuck.
I wish I had some suggestions to help with the initial problem but I don't. I don't have enough experience to even begin to guess on how to keep her pup quiet so she can go to school or spend a couple hours with friends.
|06-11-2014 10:46 AM|
|Cara Fusinato||Central CA has very reasonable real estate. I live 45 minutes from town in foothills on 5 acres in a HUGE home and similar places around here are 80K to 250K depending on mobile to mansion. There are even super reasonable rentals and rent to owns. There are lots of semi-country properties closer to the towns too. AND good groomers are in demand here. . . Just a thought -- look in the Fresno area. Mobile grooming or in-home is also really popular.|
|06-11-2014 10:43 AM|
|middleofnowhere||Ah, looking back, the poor houses I've lived in, the hard times I've had finding rentals with dogs, the times I've moved "for dogs"... It CAN be downright discouraging and expensive. Sometimes the light at the end of that tunnel is very very faint...|
|06-11-2014 08:24 AM|
If it's any comfort, I'm a pretty successful entrepreneur (I'm apparently a 1%'er though it sure doesn't feel like it!), have three dogs, will have more, and am struggling to find the property I can afford that works for me. Everything is very expensive around here. In my experience "mo money, mo problems". And I grew up poor as dirt so I have been on both sides of the spectrum.
Once you're comfortable grooming, start your own grooming business. If you have a hand for business you'll make many times the money you could make working for someone else. Money is actually quite easy to make I've found. It's only the first few dollars that are so hard won
|06-11-2014 08:12 AM|
It really does have to do with perspective; if all I focus on is the negative in my life of course I'm going to feel sad and angry. I have to remind myself that I can choose to feel bad or focus on feeling thankful and happy. When I realize I'm starting to go down the bad road I stop and think of something that makes me happy, whether it be a funny joke or something someone did and I'll find myself smiling or laughing even just a little and I can feel my mood become brighter. Baby steps
Focus on the things you CAN improve - so if you choose to go back to school or possibly buy a house then save every penny you can and put it in a savings account. Even if it's just $20 a month watching that money grow gives you something to look forward to. Why not make an appointment with a financial advisor and speak to them? The appointment was free and wow was it worth the time to sit down and find out my options.
I have a yard, it's small and yes I wish it was a heck of a lot bigger but even when I take him to my parents and let him roam on their acreage unless he's chasing a toy he's always within ten feet of me so does he really need that extra space to be happy? Nope Find some nice hiking areas and enjoy all that space without paying a penny or worrying about upkeep like cutting the grass or maintaining the trails Feel lonely? There are lots of people that have mutual interests out there you can connect with, you might be surprised at how not alone you are when you step outside of your bubble No one is perfect, it's our imperfections that make life interesting and our trials that make us strong
|06-10-2014 11:59 PM|
|Juliem24||I get stuck in that cycle, too. But, remember, as a kid, when you had to finish all the food because there were kids starving in China, or wherever? Now, I think: I'm thankful I've never had to see my kid ( or dog) starve. That gives me some perspective. I also wish I had 10 acres and the stupid neighbors with their stupid little dog were nowhere close....but, on the other hand, I'm glad I can afford kibble and Rudy doesn't have to eat that little dog for dinner...so I don't have to interact with them again. Sometimes we get stuck, then a couple of months or years later you think: oh, so that's why that happened that way!|
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