I don't even know where to go from here.

[Shaina]

I am in complete disbelief that any of this is real. I've been crying for over 10 hours, and I can't stop. I need to get this out and hear some nice things... I don't handle things like this well.

A week ago, my dad flew out to Arizona (we are in Colorado) to go out to the hospital there, as he has been really sick and the hospitals here have pretty much given up figuring out what was wrong. We own some property where we're at, so he left the dogs here with food and water, and my brother came up daily to check on the dogs and make sure all was okay. I know to many people this may seem irresponsible allowing them outdoor access, but in this area it's normal... the yard is fully secured.

When my dad came back home Monday, his black lab Molly was acting strange. She didn't come to see him, she just layed around. The next day, he called me asking if he should take her to the vet, as she had been puking and not eating and just not being herself. I told him absolutely I would. He took her to the vet and the vet for some reason didn't feel the need to run a blood test, prescribed some bland food and sent him on his way. Our American Eskimo, Bo, also started acting very strangely. He was a nerve bag anyway, so not to see him for a few days was pretty normal as he let himself outside and then would hang out under the bed during the day.

Today, Molly still hasn't been eating. My dad took her back to the vet as she hasn't ate or drank anything in almost a week. The vet FINALLY ran blood work, and found that her kidneys are only at 20% function. My dad called me and told me, and the vet told him that our only real option is to put her down. I was originally supposed to work tomorrow, but I drove down to be with him and see her for the last time. When I got here, I went up with her on the bed and she wagged her tail a little bit, but she has this sad look... she doesn't feel right at all. She will not eat ANYTHING... I brought some raw from work and looks like she wants to get sick just looking at it. We've tried everything... she will not eat or drink.

I asked my dad about Bo, and he said he was under the bed. I looked under, and there he was... but he wouldn't come out. This was also pretty normal for him. I grabbed his paw, and he didn't move. I grabbed the front two and pulled him out, and his body just drug behind him. He didn't even try to move. I noticed blood on him, which we are assuming he threw up. His eyes were wide and it looked like he couldn't blink. He was breathing very hard and I could tell he wasn't going to make it any further. Earlier today he was walking around the yard, and my dad said that even though he looked sick, he wasn't acting nearly what Molly was.

At 9:00 this evening, we had to take Bo into town to get him put down. By the time we were ready for it, his tongue was blue and we needed to rush the nurse to simply let him go. We couldn't stand seeing him suffer anymore.

VCA didn't charge us for the euthanasia and made it much easier than I thought it'd be... but I have been bawling and vomiting all day, and I can barely think straight. Knowing that we have to do this again tomorrow with Molly is terrible... she is only acting lethargic, but it seems cruel to make her live as long as she isn't on the verge of death. There is no helping her, and it hurts.

Molly is only 5, and Bo was only 6. They were both completely healthy, happy dogs and now they are both losing their lives. We are not even sure how or why... we believe they may have gotten into some antifreeze, which, if that is the case, there's nothing we could have done. My dad blames himself, which I would do in that situation as well... but it was nobodys fault. I held Bo as they put him down. I've never seen such a ready to go face in my life. We knew it had to be done, but that doesn't make it any less difficult of a choice. I don't think he would have made it through the night.

I have a son out of an accidental litter we had with Molly shortly after we got her. She was going to be put down that day after she bit a child. We're trying to look at this as a positive in that light; she got 3 more years with us than she was going to get before.

They were both great dogs. We cared for them so much, and it is really hard to let go.

Please, please.... ALWAYS be aware of what your dogs can get into. This is absolutely the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. Don't let it happen to you. I really don't know how to get over this. I just don't.

[Lucy Dog]

I'm really sorry for your loss.

At the very least, hopefully this whole ordeal is a lesson learned. I'll just leave it at that.

[dazedtrucker]

OMG. I am SOOOOOOOOO sorry

I can understand, I had a litter that got Parvo. My 2 longcoats I was keeping both died in my arms at the vet 3 days apart @ 4 months old. There is nothing as horribly painful as losing a beloved. I was an absolute WRECK for over a month....
However, I am still here This too shall pass, time and only time will heal your pain.
It has been 10 years. I still look at Axel, and he reminds me of my Shiloh & Grace. He is so much like them. I love him all the more because of that, BUT, I still have that nagging anxiety. (I'm sure its a little post traumatic stress) that "OMG, what on earth will I do if anything happened to him?" I ADORE this guy, and it SCARES me...and I love on him, and kiss him, and tell him what a great lil pup he is every day.
Live and learn. We are only human. I also lost a dog in the throws of a nasty divorce when I hired a woman to stay at my home and look after him while I was at work, I screwd up, cause the bitch neglected him, and when I found out what was going on, he had "vanished".
Moral of this story....when life stretches you to the limit, no matter how hard you try to care of "everything", while dealing with bigger badder things, YOU ARE ONLY HUMAN. Keep on cryin, stay busy, and time will ease the pain. I am so sorry. I have a great son in Ft Collins, and I'm not far either...PM me if you would like to get together or just talk or need a shoulder to cry on. I feel your pain, and just would love to give you a hug for real. (I know that may sound cheesey n weird, but dammit I needed 1 when I was there, who cares what folks think).
My neighbor came over when I was bawling on my porch, with a 5th of JD, and sat with me almost all day sippin the whiskey...LOL! She was a sweety, and I hardly knew her...just saw I'd been on my porch cryin all day, and came to see what was wrong....
Bless you......contact me if you wanna talk, I'm here. (I work nites is y I'm here at this hour, LOL!)

[shilohsmom]

I don't mean in any way to offer false hope but there is a drug that is used for kidney failure...crud, I have it saved on my WORK computer...I'm sure someone here knows it....its something like epiquin???something like there...theres actually a few drugs but this one MAYBE it would help. I might have it here...I'll be right back..

[Shaina]

Anything that could help her would be wonderful. Weve been forcing her water and I gave her some high calorie supplement last night, but we cant force her to live. We are doing everything we can... she just wont eat. :/

[Wolfiesmom]

I am so sorry for your loss! How devastating! ((hugs))

[shilohsmom]

Ok, get on the phone with your Vet and ask about two drugs:
Epakitin and Azodyl. They are put out by Vetoquinol. I'm having problems posting this (I think they are moving this post as I write) but will keep trying. Not sure if it will help but worth a try. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Cassidy's Mom]

I'm so sorry. Hindsight is 20/20 and I don't mean to beat you up, I just want to mention for the benefit of others reading your post how important it is to be an advocate for your dog. The vet really should have run blood work, and when you notice clear signs that something isn't right you sometimes have to insist. I don't know if quick action could have saved either one of them if the problem had been identified sooner, but even if not, you might have some peace of mind that no stone was left unturned.

I know what it's like to lose young dogs, I lost two back to back at 4 years old, and even knowing I did everything I possibly could to save them, there are still always regrets, there's still always a lingering "what if" at the back of the mind. I'm so glad that my vet is aware how in tune I am with my dogs. He trusts me that if I say something isn't right, even if the symptoms seem fairly minor, he listens to me and takes it seriously. When Dena got sick her only symptoms were that she seemed mopey and didn't finish her dinner. It was enough to concern me because it was out of character, and my concern was enough for my vet to run blood tests. I would have asked him to if he hadn't suggested it, but I was glad that I didn't need to.

Best wishes for Molly, I truly hope something can be done for her.

[shilohsmom]

Also ask about Vit K. I know when Eli was poisioned he was put on that. FYI, eff. July 1st they have changed the make up of rodent poisions and they're no longer able to treat it with Vit K. Is the dog urinating? What color is it?

[Shaina]

We have gotten opinions from multiple vets on her outcome, and all recommend putting her down sooner rather than later. With antifreeze poisoning, I guess there is absolutely nothing you can do. The test had come back negative for it on Friday, but considering she started acting strange on Monday, that's not a surprise. It is really hard to do this. I mixed up some raw food with water and force fed her, and after she seemed peppier and walked around the yard for a few minutes wagging her tail. I haven't seen her urinate, but she has been inside most of the time and goes out as she pleases. The problem is, she looks like she could get better at any minute. She is acting better today than she was last night. But we're being told by multiple vets that there is no way she is going to make it. Bo was different - when I got here, I KNEW immediately there was absolutely no way he could make it through the night. She is still happy, she still can jump up and down from the bed, still wags her tail and can walk up a steep hill in our yard.. how is that not treatable? I honestly don't get it. I don't know if it's fair to Molly to keep her alive when we're being told that she will die the same way Bo would have. We caused her to suffer, and if all we are doing is putting off her death as long as she APPEARS okay... I just don't know.

I looked up the medication you'd recommended - the issue is, she won't eat anything. Powders for foods and such make sense, but she won't eat or drink ANYTHING willingly. I'm not sure how to change that.