My dog likes me, not loves me?

[RogueRed26]

Sometimes, I really do think that Texas does not love me. I think she likes me or at best puts up with me. She is definitely not loyal to me. If any random dog was to come from the corner, she would bolt and never come back. Her obsession with dogs trumps me any day.

I left for vacation last week. I was sad that I had to leave her for a week cause I was going to miss her, but I knew she would be ok. I left her at my mother's house with the family saint bernard, Aerion, who is just a wonderful dog - my sister and I trained him. I returned yesterday to see that the only one that missed me was Aerion. He clung to me and cried. I hugged him and Texas was not fazed by me. All she did was ignore and avoid me. Even when I separated them in order to bathe her, she could care less being in my presence. I took her home and shes just there anxious to meet her little buddy, my roomate's shih tzu, and not excited being with me.

I feel so frustrated. I wish she would react like Aerion. It makes me sad that the dog that gets everything doesn't seem to enjoy it, while Aerion is begging for the extra attention. For me, Aerion exudes that loyalty and admiration that Texas never shows. Heck, most of the dogs previous to Texas were extremely loveable and loyal. Why doesn't Texas love me? What did I do wrong? It puts my mind to an extreme that I wish I could trade Texas for Aerion; though, that is not a possibility since my landlord does not allow giant breeds. Ugh! Sorry guys, I really needed to vent.

Note: My mom does not allow dogs to be inside (except her yorkie), so Aerion is strictly an outdoor dog, while at my apartment Texas is strictly an indoor dog.

[mwiacek10]

How old is he? It took quite some time before Gunny would even stand next to me long enough to get a good pet in or any loving. I was afraid he would always be that way. After two years I can't get him off of me! He's a 75 lbs lap dog.

[southernfiction]

I have some experience with what you're talking about, but it was long ago and with an Irish setter named Major. Looking back at our relationship, I know that he had no respect for me whatsoever. "If I'd known then what I know now" I'd have realized much of the answer was training, much was that he was not neutered, much was that he was not a breed who liked to stay close. He was a birddog! Birddogs leave you! I didn't realize any of that back then.

Love is a funny word with dogs and cats. They don't know what it means, actually. They don't know they're hurting your feelings when they give all their attention to your houseguest. Love is a word best used on humans.

I think you could try starting over with your dog after a period of your studying obedience training. Go with the treats. My latest two rescue puppies decided I was wonderful once they decided good behavior earned treats from me. I am the dispenser of good things. Therefore, I am the one to look to. I am also the one who says NO/ACK/HEY when displeased. I expect to be listened to. These children respect me. They also might like me. I do not know if they love me. I don't think it matters.

[chicagojosh]

are you putting a lot of effort into bonding with Texas? walks, hikes, playing ball, training, treats and praise? cuddling up on the couch together?

As Michele mentioned above, age could matter too. Cody was and still is so dang energetic and rowdy that he doesn't hold still for a pets unless he's tired. If im outside my neighbors will try to pet him. he'll hang around for like 3 seconds then off to play. he'd just rather be playing... maybe some of that applies to Texas too?

[RogueRed26]

Thank you for your responses. I appreciate it. Texas is 1 1/2 years old. I have had her since she was three months old. We have been going to obedience training since she was 4 months old. We just recently started attending obedience classes again for strengthening her commands. I am the only one who trains, feeds, cares, dresses (I know, I know. Horrible mom, sometimes I put her in sweaters, jackets and jerseys. Sample picture below ), grooms, and walks her. I try to make sure she practices NILF with me, so she knows who to follow.


Texas wearing her winter coat that I bought for her.

I do get those comments a lot from friends, "She doesn't love you, but she sure listens/respects you." "I think she likes you, not loves you." I like that she tends to listen to me a bit more, I say a bit cause if a dog is there I am NOT THERE ANYMORE.

[mwiacek10]

I think you need to give it time and with training you will both bond. It really breaks my heart to hear you say you don't think she loves you. Lay on the ground and let her give you puppy kisses! She's got such a happy face.

[RogueRed26]

I can't help but compare her to other dogs I have had. She is not as affectionate as the others. I feel that I put a lot of work to create that bond and am not getting where I want to be. She cares, I know she does, but I am definitely not her favorite. I don't know, maybe I am forcing the relationship, who knows.

[BGSD]

Perhaps your dog is excessively aloof. Does she exhibit the same lack of affection towards other people too?

[ZAYDA]

I THINK IT'S THE SWEATER..

Like others have mentioned bonding, playing hide & seek, TREATS, allowing her to realize you are the boss but good things come from that.

Give it time but work on it it's early she is young.

[Emoore]

Originally Posted by RogueRed26

Sometimes, I really do think that Texas does not love me. I think she likes me or at best puts up with me.

Kinda reminds me of being married.