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GSD Fan 03-22-2014 09:32 AM

Does anyone have any renting and car experience?
 
Do any of the members on here have experience with renting homes and buying cars? I would like to ask for advice.

I currently live with my parents in a beat up older home. My parents own this land and house, but the house needs renovating badly. My parents are in a financial tight situation and they told me not to spend my money on repairing the house, to let them do it when the time came.

In December 2013, in an episode of my illness, I applied to four apartment complexes in town. Since then, my medicines have kicked in and so far I am no longer sick. I seem to be in my right mind.

About one or two days ago, one of the apartment complexes called and I told the lady I was still interested in a 1 bedroom apartment.

My first question is, am I doing the right thing by moving out?

My father says no, but my mother says "you go girl!".

The apartment complex is really nice, and features the elderly and disabled. My rent would be based on my income, which should be around $100 a month.
That is not including other bills, like power, tv, internet, and phone.

Currently at my parents' home, I pay 1/3 of all bills which totals to $100 per month and I pay my cell phone bill. If I move, I can get rid of that cell phone and get a cell phone for emergencies at no cost.

Another one of my concerns is my neighbors.

The last time I moved away from my parents and out of the country, I was renting a 1 bedroom apartment in a duplex house. My neighbors, a woman and her son, constantly talked about me and I could hear it through the walls. Whenever I took a phone call and moved to another room, she moved with me and heard my phone calls. She would talk about me and make comments about me, and whenever I moved, she moved with me.

It got to the point in which I could not study and I was happy to get out of there when I had an episode and my mother moved my things out while I was hospitalized.

These are mostly elderly people, but the woman who did that to me was in her 40s. My question is, if my next neighbor does me that way, how can I cope with it? How can I study with it? I plan on NOT introducing myself to my neighbors and keeping totally to myself.

Now, about a car. It is a simple question.

If I buy a car out of someone's yard, it will cost more. However, if I go to the car auction, I can buy a car much cheaper. The problem with the car auction is I have to have my father and a bidder with me. The problem is not with the bidder, but my father. He has a certain way of acting and if you do something he wouldn't do, he'll talk down on it.

For example, my sister paid around maybe $1200 for a Ford Tarus that lasted 4 years. My father didn't want her to buy it, but she bought it any way. He talked bad about it constantly, saying she paid too much and that it had problems. He did the same thing with my mother when she paid $12000 for a 2 year old trailblazer that has been going for 8 years. He talked bad about it too and here's the thing, before you know it he'll ask and beg you to drive your vehicle after talking so bad about it.

I don't want him to control anything, but knowing him he'll tell the bidder not to bid too much. Then, there's the hundred of people who will be at the auction. I am fearful of people and I am afraid someone will talk about me or make fun of me, since a lot of people there may be ghetto.

Does anyone have any advice at all about buying a car?

Last but not least, thank you for reading this! Thank you! :)

robk 03-22-2014 09:44 AM

I cannot give you advice on your living situation. Only you know whether moving would be add value to your life. I can offer you some inside information on the car business. I have been in the car business in various forms for most of my career. You can pretty much always assume that every car being sold at a public auction has something wrong with it. The auctions protect the sellers as they are a clearing house and act as mediator for the transaction. If the car was in good running shape or had a minor problem that could be inexpensively repaired the seller (mostly independent car dealers) would retail it them selves. There is also a draw back to buying a car from a private party. The draw back there is that you get no warranty if there are problems down the road. However, I would take my chances with the private party over the public auction because you can take the car to your own mechanic to have it checked out prior to making a final commitment. You cannot do that if you buy through the auction.

GSD Fan 03-22-2014 09:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by robk (Post 5247442)
I cannot give you advice on your living situation. Only you know whether moving would be add value to your life. I can offer you some inside information on the car business. I have been in the car business in various forms for most of my career. You can pretty much always assume that every car being sold at a public auction has something wrong with it. The auctions protect the sellers as they are a clearing house and act as mediator for the transaction. If the car was in good running shape or had a minor problem that could be inexpensively repaired the seller (mostly independent car dealers) would retail it them selves. There is also a draw back to buying a car from a private party. The draw back there is that you get no warranty if there are problems down the road. However, I would take my chances with the private party over the public auction because you can take the car to your own mechanic to have it checked out prior to making a final commitment. You cannot do that if you buy through the auction.

I know there was no advice about the living situation, but I like and appreciate the car buying advice. Thank you. :)

sehrgutcsg 03-22-2014 10:40 AM

I kind of understand where your going here >

My thought is; you're not ready to commingle with the neighbors, you want to keep to yourself, afraid of ridicule. Am I correct ?

If this is the case, get treatment for that and stay at home with your parents where you feel more secure. Then once you can get into an elevator and start up a conversation with anybody that smiles at you, your ready to move on, from what I read here, your not ready and asking here is the proof. Sorry to be blunt, know about these feelings and the inability to just talk about the weather to a stranger seems difficult, you need emotional stimulation and what's called coping skills !!

btw, a bus pass is your ticket..

GSD Fan 03-22-2014 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sehrgutcsg (Post 5247578)
I kind of understand where your going here >

My thought is; you're not ready to commingle with the neighbors, you want to keep to yourself, afraid of ridicule. Am I correct ?

If this is the case, get treatment for that and stay at home with your parents where you feel more secure. Then once you can get into an elevator and start up a conversation with anybody that smiles at you, your ready to move on, from what I read here, your not ready and asking here is the proof. Sorry to be blunt, know about these feelings and the inability to just talk about the weather to a stranger seems difficult, you need emotional stimulation and what's called coping skills !!

btw, a bus pass is your ticket..

Um, it's not that bad. I can start a conversation with almost any one. Not too long ago I jokingly asked a woman for her car and payments and she laughed and everything. I can talk to people.

I CAN comingle with the neighbors, but I know from experience it's not worth it. It's better to live some place for years without knowing your neighbor's name or face, then to be nice to them and have them making comments about you and listening to every single one of your phone calls.

wyoung2153 03-22-2014 10:56 AM

I'm not going to sit here and tell you that you have to move out or you shouldn't leave. Because as others stated.. it's really going to come down to you and what you know is right for you.. btu I can give my opinion. In my experience, moving away from home might actually help with your people skills.. and staying home may only deepen that fear. I also think that it is so unfortunate that your first move went the way it did. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. Just know that not everyone is that way. and if you decide to move it might actually be a good thing to introduce yourself to your neighbors. If not only to let them know you are are a nice person and not a sketchy character, though keeping to yourself wouldn't be a bad idea either, it really is up to you and your comfort level. I think when you have had a bad experience it tends to stick with you and that's why you are unsure of yourself right now. The first time I lived on my own was in Germany.. military moved me there for my first station. I was scared outa my mind. I was 18 and not ready for that.. it put me in a situation where I had to decide to be uncomfortable the entire time and not talk to anyone outside my home, or get the courage to go out, walk around, take Titan places, wave to my neighbors, etc. It was the best experience I ever had. IT set the tone for how I want to be at every new place I move, because it's a lot. Now my situation is very different because I had no choice but I wanted you to know that I struggled too and once you find a good place, it really is an incredible growing experience.

On the other side. Staying home may be beneficial too as someone stated, where you can learn to be more social and unafraid of being ridiculed. It may set the foundation for confidence in your future home.

As for the car.. I'm sorry but I don't have experience with that.

Mind me asking how old you are and if you will be bringing you dog?

wyoung2153 03-22-2014 10:58 AM

Sorry you responded while I was responding.. glad to know more about your social life.. makes a difference. Don't mean to make you sound like a fragile, unsociable person.. :)

Blanketback 03-22-2014 11:14 AM

I think robk gave you great advice about the car, and I'd look at a private seller too. Lots of people sell their old cars for cheap when they want a new one. The thing about this new apartment that I want to point out is that if you're a private person then it might not be a good idea to live surrounded by people who do nothing all day, because they're retired. I know lots of retired people who've enjoyed this time in their life, where they devote alot of time to volunteering for causes they believe in. However, I also know from past experience that it only takes a couple of busybodies to make your life a living nightmare. So before taking this new place, I'd be looking to meet the neighbors first. If they're friendly and interesting and have a life, then go for it. If they're nosey and critical and sit at the window watching the action all day long then save yourself the nightmare of being their next entertainment. Good luck with your decision!

llombardo 03-22-2014 11:21 AM

Let me tell you what my Mom did to me one time at a car auction....I went and I bid on a nice little wagon and was done, but my mom wasn't. She decided I needed a van and while I was wrapping up things with the wagon she ended up with a van. Now this might not sound bad, but she decided that I would pay her back for the van that I never wanted by working at her pizza place for free. She was never one to argue with so I spent many hours working for a van I never wanted...true story I swear:D

Look around for deals for the car and don't be afraid to take the next step if you feel you are ready as far as moving. Only you can decide that. Good Luck

middleofnowhere 03-22-2014 01:03 PM

I have bought two cars from dealers in my life. (of many cars.) First one was my first car which I coowned with my folks. Second one I was in my early 40s - it was a huge old toyota crown. It had a very short life. The ford I bought in 1992 from a private party (it was a year old.) I still have it. (I bought a lot of other cars between these.)
I would be warry of public auction cars - I'd check them out very carefully before bidding. Look for certs that they have not been subject to a flood or in a serious wreck. Make sure they have a title and not a salvage title.

Sounds like you had a wierd neighbor the first time out. There are wierd neighbors out there, there are also really terrific neighbors. Keep in mind, a noise canceling "radio" could make your conversations hard to track for a nosey neighbor. Also being very open could make you incredibly boring. Or being disgustingly friendly...


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