Any Kindergarten Teachers out there? Help!

[bunchoberrys]

My 5yrold received his progress report today, and it was not what I was expecting. "Talks alot, doesn't follow along with the group at times, goes off and does his own thing when not happy with the group project, starts projects before when told to do so". But then goes on saying "he's very helpful, intelligent, wants to help other students" Now, please correct me if I am wrong. In the real world, you get hired for the very attributes you get you into trouble at school !!! Think about it. The gift of gab, resourcefulness, thinking outside the lines, taking initiative, being independent, figuring out unique angles, using a vivid imagination....all these traits, are assets on the job !!!! Ask a busy entreprenuer, a top producing salesperson, or a talented actor what his grades were and I bet you don't find that he wants to talk about it. These are 5yrolds people !! You cannot expect a 5yrold to sit and studyfrom 8:30am to 4:00pm everyday with only two 10-15 min recesses (this has been explained to us that this is what the teacher expects.....not to mention she is pregnant with her first child and this is only her 3rd year of teaching). Also, I just want to say that the comments were made by his homeroom teacher. All his other teachers gave him good reports (spanish, art, gym, computer lab). I have an appointment to meet with the principal in the next couple of days. UGGGGG. Rant over.

[Dainerra]

it's just a progress report. Part of starting school is learning to follow the rules (and unless you own your own business, you're going to have to follow someone's rules).

She is telling you the things that he needs to work on - not talking out of turn, doing a project even if you think it's boring etc. All things that are part of "the real world"
The reason that the other teachers likely don't see it as much is because they are with him only a short amount of time. It's a new activity so his attention is engaged and it's more interesting.

I wouldn't worry too much about it. And the important thing is - work WITH his teacher, not against her. It's normal behavior for his age but that doesn't mean that he shouldn't learn to follow the rules and do things that he doesn't like to do.

[Jax08]

That simply translates into "He isn't the perfect little robot but has potential". Call the teacher and set up a conference. You may find out he's bored. You may find the teacher is a jerk (had a couple of those) that shouldn't be working with young children. Or you may find your child needs some maturity. That is usually what it boils down to...maturity...which he will get in the next year or two.

[JeanKBBMMMAAN]

Originally Posted by Dainerra

it's just a progress report. Part of starting school is learning to follow the rules (and unless you own your own business, you're going to have to follow someone's rules).

She is telling you the things that he needs to work on - not talking out of turn, doing a project even if you think it's boring etc. All things that are part of "the real world"
The reason that the other teachers likely don't see it as much is because they are with him only a short amount of time. It's a new activity so his attention is engaged and it's more interesting.

I wouldn't worry too much about it. And the important thing is - work WITH his teacher, not against her. It's normal behavior for his age but that doesn't mean that he shouldn't learn to follow the rules and do things that he doesn't like to do.

This is very helpful, great advice. And even people who own their business have to follow a lot rules.

School is about building a successful foundation in the basics so that you can take what is unique about you and expand upon it. But that foundation is necessary.

ETA - also just because there are areas in need of improvement, that's not BAD. It just is. So you have fun making those things stuff you work on a bit at home. Like Control Unleashed, or Crate Games. But when a kid sees a parent freaking out at the kindergarten level over 1 constructive comment in an otherwise great report, it sends a lot of messages to that kid - make sure you know what messages you want your kid to get.

[Liesje]

My husband teaches elementary ed and just did report cards last week. He kept asking me for advice on how to phrase things. He said some parents want brutal honesty even if their kid really is an angel, and others just can't stand to hear anything less. Then he's got a kid that is really bad at school, but the parents need to support and nurture the kid not punish him all the time (he's acting out because he only gets negative attention from the parents) so he's afraid to be honest about how bad the kid really is.

His school has time alloted for parent-teacher conferences (mandatory for him) following the release of report cards.

[bunchoberrys]

Thank you all for the input. I am just frustrated that this is a problem "all of sudden", and nothing was brought up to me before. No notes sent home, no calls, nothing. I am the kind of parent that likes to 'nip it in the bud' before any other troubles arise. I have two other older children who are star students and fellow teachers and staff know what kind of parents we are. We are involved with the school alot, with activities, sports, etc. Are my children angels ? No. They are children and they do screw up. But, they do know about rules and what is expected of them whether its at home, school, or any other place. I only want my child to succeed, I'm sure you all can understand. I am just baffled and upset that the teacher did not notify us earlier that this was such an issue. Especially since we just had conferences in November and all was wonderful. Do I agree with her direction of teaching? No. I don't believe that a 5yrold should have to be seated for most of the day and do work that is expected of a 1st grader or 2nd grader. Other K teachers are doing stations/centers with there kids, the kids are up moving around doing hands on work. Why this teacher is taking this direction, and not following suit as the others....I have no idea. I personally thought that all teachers followed a certain curriculum. Apparently I have been misinformed. The appointment with the principal is coming up, so hopefully this will be resolved soon.

[sit,stay]

I am actually teaching two kindergarten classes right now, in a public elementary school. Kindergarten is just as much about learning how to do "things" as it is about academics.

Dainerra is correct. The target behaviors are all attributes that are needed for continued success in school, and then later on in life. Children and adults need to know how to attend to projects/activities even when they aren't that interested in them. Working in unison (staying with the group, not working ahead) is more about following directions than anything else. Talking a lot might be the difference between hearing instructions from the teacher (not only for the OP's child but for the child sitting next to him) and not hearing instructions.

Although it might seem that the kinders are being asked to attend to a full day of school, with just a couple of 15 minute recesses, they are actually moving at lightening speed from one activity to another. So it isn't a case of asking a 5 year old to spend 50 minutes on math and then 50 minutes on language arts. They are spending 15 minutes on a math activity and 10 minutes on a reading activity. And so on throughout the day. They just don't have the ability to focus for any longer than that.

It is too bad that the teacher didn't mention anything about this prior to progress reports. Mine just went out last week, too, and I worked really hard to make sure that nobody had an unpleasant surprise. That being said, it sounds like this little guy is well liked and a part of the classroom community. I would urge the OP to contact the teacher and ask for an informal meeting to go over the progress report. Let her know that you want to make sure home and school are on the same page about where he needs to go and how you can all get him there.

Good luck! It will be okay.
Sheilah

[JeanKBBMMMAAN]

It is also very possible that the teacher didn't view these as true negatives or things that were unacceptable, either in general, or in comparison to other behaviors she might be dealing with in the classroom. The teacher may be thinking this is a kid, who does kid things, and doesn't need anything other than time to adjust to this new way of doing things. Since you've already made the appointment with the principal and not the teacher, I would be curious if he's doing this in his other areas and it just wasn't commented on.

[holland]

If the school allows it -it might be helpful to observe-you might see what the teacher is talking about

[Liesje]

Originally Posted by JeanKBBMMMAAN

It is also very possible that the teacher didn't view these as true negatives or things that were unacceptable, either in general, or in comparison to other behaviors she might be dealing with in the classroom. The teacher may be thinking this is a kid, who does kid things, and doesn't need anything other than time to adjust to this new way of doing things. Since you've already made the appointment with the principal and not the teacher, I would be curious if he's doing this in his other areas and it just wasn't commented on.

That was my thinking as well. My DH always tries to have *something* that a kid can work on/improve on (as well as comments on things they are doing well and should be praised for), but it doesn't mean it's causing real disruptions or something that he feels is bad enough to make reports to the principal and calls home. He already spends 12 hours a day at his school (he gets there at 7am and doesn't get home until 7pm or later) and then about 3-5 hours in the evening grading, preparing curriculum, and answering calls and e-mails, plus he often goes in for a half day on Saturday, so each little thing that a kid might be able to improve on would not be something he'd immediately call home about given the amount of other work and the fact that it's usually just kids being kids.