so frustrated

[Bridget]

I know I am telling more than anyone really wants to know, but I have no face-to-face friends I can discuss this with, so....you guys are it. We are having some serious financial problems. To sum it up in as few words as possible, husband tried to start his own business, it isn't working out, he is more or less unemployed with little or no income. If something doesn't give here, I believe it is a mathematical certainty that we will lose our house a few months down the road, which I could take except that we have a house full of animals that couldn't go to a rental. Anyhow, I called about the home loan modification program that I have heard about. They can't help us because, wait for it....our credit score doesn't qualify us to have our loan modified or refinanced. If our credit score was good, it would mean we didn't have a problem, right?? Now we are trying to get a deferment on our daughter's student loan that husband is responsible for; not trying to not pay, just a year's break till we can get things worked out. They want documentation of his income, I said he doesn't have any. They asked if we are on any assistance programs, I said no. They tell me we don't qualify then; if you aren't on welfare, you can't get any help! And quite frankly even if we wanted to get on "assistance programs," I'm sure we couldn't because I work! Apparently, two types of people can get any help at all in this country: opportunists who don't really need help, just see a way to better their lives, and folks who are willing to quit trying to help themselves and just live on all kinds of welfare. I am just venting, pretty sure there are no solutions for us. Thanks for listening to me rant.

[RocketDog]

Bridget, I don't have much to offer you, but I wanted to say I heard you and I'm thinking of you.

[jang]

I am sorry for what you are going through..So many people with so many similar problems and no apparent solution..I cannot help you either other than to say put your faith in God and try to stay positive during this time ..Prayers for you...jan

[Liesje]

Would you get the deferment if he filed for unemployment?

[GSDGunner]

What kind of business did he try? And why is it not working out?
I ask because I too have my own business and we work so hard at it.
It's not easy but we make it work.

[BahCan]

Bridget....very sorry to hear you and your family are going through this right now.

Is there any way you could have a consultant take a look at your husbands business plan, his direction, the marketing, overhead costs etc and make suggestions that could put the business on the right path to success. If there were indications that this could be a successful business after seeking the advice of a consultant, perhaps you could seek out an investor who would be willing to invest in your business to help make it a success.

[Bridget]

It is construction. It was hoped that enough could be made to make up for the turn in season, but hasn't happened. He may be able to get an "unemployment deferral" on the student loan I just learned. Unemployment nope, not when you have been self employed. We will see if you have to be receiving unemployment benefits to get this type of deferral.

[kiya]

Take a deep breath, you have to hang in there. I've been thru the ringer, believe me. We went into business in 2007 and out of business in 2009, what I thought was the worst time of my life. We made it thru that and are now on to our next ordeal.
I know it sounds clich'e but things have a way of working themselves out and it is truely darkest before dawn.
I keep telling my husband we will work this new thing out, I'm not going to side track your thread with my new problems, when I'm up to it I will probably need to post.

THERE ARE SOLUTIONS FOR YOU, you just need to figure it out.

[Courtney]

Not sure if this is an option for you. I just helped an employee with this process a few days ago.

If you have a 401k....perhaps you qualify for a "hardship withdrawl" based on your current situation? The IRS has strict guidelines to this.

This would only be a short term fix...just keeping your head above water and holding onto your house longer.

[JeanKBBMMMAAN]

Consumer Credit Counseling Service Des Moines Iowa | Consumer Credit of Des Moines
This would be my first call - they may be able to help guide you through most of these things and if they can't, might know of the places you can get help that are reputable and not trying to take your money to help you.
About Us | Consumer Credit of Des Moines

List of resources for small business owners:
Des Moines District Office Resources | SBA.gov

I don't think self-employed get unemployment? I don't know about that exactly. (ETA - you answered that)

Iowa Department of Human Services

But I would start with the first place and see what they can do to help. I am really sorry that this is happening. I hope for the best for you.

Also - weird thought - the talk is that there are tons of jobs in North Dakota is it? Not maybe the best of options but something I've heard about.