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Old 10-24-2012, 11:16 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default How would YOU approach somebody about their will?

This may sound strange.

I have been my neighbors' nanny to his dog since the day he brought him home as a 10wk old puppy. I've worked with and trained this dog (though it's been ruined by other people), I took him to his graduating OB class and the trainer said she'd never seen him behave so well. Me and him adore each other, that's obvious. He's matured into a beautiful, BIG, and dominating English Lab who is ALLL boy.

He stays with my neighbors' daughters sometimes, and this drives me crazy, because they get him very riled up and hit him for being excited, they take him to dog parks and get him in fights with other dogs, they're ruined his OB training by making it a game to chase him when he doesn't listen.

I just got to thinking recently, what if something happens to my neighbor? This dog will go to his kids. HE doesn't even like how they handle him and have asked them to at least stop hitting him, which they haven't.. And honestly.. one of the kids molests him.


I feel like he's my dog, and if anything DID happen to my neighbor, him going to these people would just add insult to injury. I wouldn't give them a goldfish - HECK, my neighbor gave me the kids' fish when they lost interest in them.

How would you approach someone about such a touchy and morbid topic?
I really don't want to offend him, and my people skills are not so good. lol
I don't think he has considered a plan for the dog in the event something happens. I love the both of them very much and I don't want to insult anyone.

Thanks in advance for any help.
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Old 10-24-2012, 11:22 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Yea its morbid but if you feel so strongly about the dog (obviously you do) there is no reason not to be honest with your neighbor about how you feel. Personally, because im very blunt and very honest, when I feel its right just bring up the topic. "Hey if anything would happen to you I would like to care for the dog." and let the conversation evolve from there. You dont need to really bring up everything else about the other people but tell him how YOU feel, firmly and honestly. Unfortunatly in the end it may not go your way but do your best to try. Good luck!
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Old 10-24-2012, 11:25 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I would just say "hey you know if anything ever happens I am happy to take care of your dog." I've had friends say that to me about my dogs. Granted I'm only 28 so I'm not reading anything into it like they think I'm old and near death, but it is reassuring.
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Old 10-24-2012, 12:33 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I just worry, he's my boy and I love him to death. I'd hate to see something happen to him AFTER losing his daddy too. He is so sensitive to any correction, and these people hit him for being friendly, scream at him etc.
I've noticed in the last few months he is terrified to put his collar on. Like SCARED, not just trying ot avoid it so he can run loose. And any time I pull it or give a little pop to get his attention he crouches down and cringes. I don't know what they've been doing to him, but visits are bad enough.


And you're never too young or healthy to plan for your animals (or kids). I'm very young, but I've already almost lost my life and have no idea how I lived through what I did, and my family already knows what to do with my animals if I die.

I hope it goes well, I'd hate for him to think I'm trying to be selfish or anything.
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Old 10-24-2012, 01:18 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Liesje View Post
I would just say "hey you know if anything ever happens I am happy to take care of your dog." I've had friends say that to me about my dogs.

I agree with Liesje, this is the best way to approach it. If you are on friendly terms with his children, say the same thing, "Hey, anything ever happened to your dad I am willing to take the dog". I'd leave it that though.
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Old 10-24-2012, 01:18 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Is your neighbor fairly young?

I feel for you and the whole situation. I like the advice Liesje had to give. But I'd ask to get it in writing. Broach the subject before handing a paper over. Something short that maybe you can write up. Like "In the event that I pass away or am incapacitated and can no longer take care of {insert dog's name here}, I would like {insert dog's name} to be cared for by {insert your name}." With a signature....

I know that sounds pretty brazen maybe even not doable but try to keep it light and simple...
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Old 10-24-2012, 01:41 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Since you are so close to your neighbor,I would just be upfront with them and let them know that you would be willing to take the dog if something happens to him, and maybe have them put it in the will if they want to do that.
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:02 AM   #8 (permalink)
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No, he's really not young. I don't think he's going to die of old age.. I really don't expect anything bad to happen at all - but you never do.

The kids are just that, kids. And they - nor the ex wife I'd expect - would agree with it. They're all spoiled little brats. They never took the dog to THEIR house when he was a young pup because they did not want to deal with the chewing and messes and took it out on him. So any time the owner was out of town - very often - I had the dog because they refused until he was well-trained. Until they ruined that.. I've told them to their faces many times not to hit the dog, as they've done it in front of me. I guess you can imagine how stressing that is - a dog that you've raised mostly, and having to watch him ruined and abused by KIDS because you have no legal right over him. If it came to it, I can say I've seen them abuse him, the kids told me themselves that the younger one.. well.. fondles him.. Other neighbors and my family who know him too have seen them hurt him for doing nothing wrong.


I do NOT want another dog, that's no what it is at all, I'm totally happy getting to spend time with him daily out of my house. I have Jaeger, the DA GSD and him and this one don't like each other - since this one was a tiny puppy. But I know it would be just wrong if something happened to let them take him. No matter how much time and work it would take to get him and Jaeger to behave with each other - I'd do it.
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Jaeger, Ben, Goose, Dirk, LingLing, Bentley, Elliot, Batman.

Last edited by APBTLove; 10-25-2012 at 11:05 AM.
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:19 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Also if people are really abusing the dog then that should be reported to the proper authority.
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Old 12-17-2012, 10:47 AM   #10 (permalink)
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He actually agreed without any hesitation, it was brought up to him last week, thought I'd update.

Lies, I don't know how animal control works where you are, but here unless you have proof of real, serious abuse - they'll go by the house, ask the owner if they abuse their animal and leave. I called and then met up with an ACO and tearfully told him what I'd seen when it came to a very abused, emaciated dog, then followed the ACO to the dogs' house, he walked on the porch, talked to the owners, did NOT even ask to look at the dog and then left. Nothing.

When I reported a dog with an ingrown collar tied up in plain sight, they walked up to the dog, said "No, he has thick hair. If you see anything else let us know."
That dog died two days later, not sure why, he was just laying out there on this tether dead and a doorknob.

When it came to a dog I fostered and somehow she ended up with AC (long story, nothing I could do) those ignorant turds told me the collar she had on and her *SURGERY* scars meant she was fought. The collar she had on was the one I adopted her out wearing and the SCAR was from cats and a repair surgery on her leg.

No, the only time I call AC, the SPCA, whatever is if I have a stray that needs to be picked up or an aggressive animal. I've lost all faith in them.

Not to mention if AC did decided to be d**ks and take the dog, he'd end up in the pound. Which I must say is worse than the girls being rough on him. He's a big, mouthy dog with more energy than most greyhounds and is ALLL male, he would possibly end up being euthanized because he's a working dog, not your average pet..
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Sparkles, Lilith, Eve, Candy, Dahlia, Juno, Tonks.


Jaeger, Ben, Goose, Dirk, LingLing, Bentley, Elliot, Batman.
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