How many army wives/gfs or women who live in a diff. city then their hubby?

[x0emiroxy0x]

It has been 9 months since my boyfriend graduated and moved back to dallas/fort worth to try to find a good police force to join. Obviously I have NO reason to complain compared to those of you who have men in the armed forces...

But I am just so lonely. Before hubby left, we had ten+ couples we hung out with (at different times) 3 nights a week. Ever since he left, I just don't want to hang out with our couple friends. It isn't the same.

All my single friends just want to go to the bars and meet guys to go home with. I LOVE going out dancing, but I want to dance with my girlfriends, not any men. Unfortunately, if I go with my couple friends, they dance with their boyfriend all night (of course) and if I go with my single friends they try to dance with every guy possible.

Every single thing in this city reminds me of him! I hate riding the bus because we used to carpool to university together every day...I hate the walk from the parking garage to the rec center because we used to walk there together everyday...I hate all my old favorite restaurants because I have so many amazing memories there.

During the day it isn't so bad because I study about 5-7 hours a day after class(I am an honors student and my father won't help with college if I make a single C) but once I get in bed or it gets late and I just want someone to cuddle, play scrabble with, talk to...that is when I get sad.

I am THE LUCKIEST PERSON ALIVE that I have my beautiful baby Rocky. I don't care if he is from a backyard breeder and will never do agility or schtzhnd with me or be perfect around strangers.

I LOVE HIM and when he cuddles me at night I don't feel as alone.

I have been volunteering at the library, animal shelter, and working with a therapeutic horse back riding program for children with cerebral palsy....all of these things are SO rewarding!! I just wish I could volunteer/work more to get my mind off things.

Anyone else live in a different city (or country) from their loved one? What do you do when you get sad about missing them? Other than volunteering I just don't know what to do...I have sewed a new bed for rocky, vests for him, and outfits for my stepmoms super fat dog that won't fit into any store brands, but I am out of ideas!

[Emoore]

Not technically living in a different city, but my husband travels nearly every week for work. He usually leaves on Monday and comes home on Friday. Between school, work, and the dogs I really don't have time to be bored though. It does get lonely at night.

[x0emiroxy0x]

That is exactly what I am talking about! I go to school, then study for 5+ hours, walk Rocky on avg. 2 hours a day, then take him to highly populated places for training. But once it gets dark and I'm laying alone is when I wish I had someone to tell about my day (NOT over the phone)...I dislike talking on the phone A LOT!

[dogfaeries]

Mine works in the oil field, and is gone about a month at a time. Home for a couple of weeks, and then back out in the oil field. Right now that oil field is in North Dakota and I'm in Oklahoma!

It does get lonely. I've just added more dog related activities to my schedule and that helps. Go to training, GSD club meetings, dog show weekends, run the dogs in the woods with my GSD friends. Stuff like that.

And Netflix is my new best friend, lol. At night I camp out on the couch with the shepherds and we watch Netflix. Currently I'm watching Breaking Bad...

[AbbyK9]

Eh. My hubby was in Afghanistan from 2010 to 2011. Big deal. You just find stuff you enjoy doing and do it, and you look forward to little phone calls or hitting each other up on chat when there's a chance ... even if you don't like talking on the phone.

[Alexandria610]

My boyfriend is in the Air Force and works on missiles at Maelstrom in Montana. It sucks not getting to see him, and having to have a long-distance relationship (I honestly would probably move if I wasn't in the process of finishing my Bachelor's of Science) but I'll be honest and say I'm really glad he doesn't have a job where he has to be shipped overseas. The only thing that sucks about his job is the physically tolling work that is involved in maintaining missiles. He's only 22 and his back is already starting to give out on him. My brother-in-law, doing the same position for the same amount of years has developed the back issues along with shin splints, asthma, chronic fatigue, sleep apnea (due to the asthma) and insomnia (due to the apnea). It's a vicious cycle. But again - happy that they are still visitable, and not in a desert overseas somewhere.

Just wish he was closer. Netflix is my friend, too. And I also find nights where he goes to bed early because he has to be up before dawn to drive out to a site, and I look at the clock and then the wall and think "what...do I do now?"

Love sick, I am

[x0emiroxy0x]

Any of you heard of hastings? You rent movies there for 49 cents. My best friend. That and yogurt.

[Rerun]

If being lonely at night is an issue, and everything you're writing is about being lonely at night, it likely isn't going to get any better if he is hired as a police officer. I'm a little confused because you started the thread about army wives, which is different from a long distance relationship (which is what you are currently in) and certainly different than being with a police officer.

Most new cops are assigned to nights, because most officers (not all) with some time on have families with kids, etc, and work some form of a day or middle shift. So depending on the area and the dept, nights may or may not be desireable. But day shift for rookies is almost unheard of. Here the guys working days for the most part have 15, 20 yrs on.

You say boyfriend, then hubby, but either way - if the relationship is serious, why aren't you there with him? I would have been looking for a job where he already is like yesterday. And if he's just applying to depts, there was really no reason to move at all. It's pretty common for police depts to get long distance applications. Once they make it through the initial paperwork, they usually will travel for the fitness test and psych eval. It's usually a heck of a waiting game.

[x0emiroxy0x]

It isn't so much at "night", IE sleeping alone...We used to always share everything about our days and play board games together every night, watch a movie. It was "us" time.

Regardless of if you are an army wife or if your significant other is in another city, the loneliness is still an issue. That is where it ties in.

I am not with him because I am in college, double majoring in Spanish and Management and cannot transfer my hours to another university.

He is hoping to graduate at the top of the academy and he was informed that for Arlington, the top 3 graduates get to choose their shifts as initiative for being the best. I don't care if I don't get to see him at night. If I get to see him for five minutes every day, just to share a hug and a quick story that is fine by me.

Is there anything else about my post that you want to pick apart? I understand that you greatly enjoy twisting everyone's threads to either be offensive towards you or make them look stupid. I am sorry that you have so much extra time on your hands to be rude.

[ladyfreckles]

Pat and I met online in 1999. We knew each other from a forum, but didn't start talking until 2005-2006 or so. It was weird because we had feelings for each other, and would occasionally start flirting, but then we'd remember the age difference and back off. We finally decided that we would see different people and come back to it if we still felt the same way. Back then, he lived in Chicago and I lived in northern New Jersey. Our 5.5 year age difference made things very awkward.

In 2008 he moved to Seattle. He was really busy with work, and I had a "serious" relationship so we weren't really talking much. My boyfriend was abusive. After I broke up with my now ex, Pat and I started talking again. We talked for awhile, and flirted, but decided we didn't want to put labels on anything. We started acting like a couple and first told friends about what was going on between us in October of 2009. After I turned 18 that December we went live with the relationship to family and friends.

I visited frequently, my visits lasting for usually a month or so at a time. Finally that summer I couldn't take it anymore and moved across the country. 2800 miles.

We're now happy together. Would I do the distance thing again? Yes, if I had to for school. It's very hard though and I remember being really depressed around the times I would be back home.