So Upset (non GSD & long)

[squeak]

Yesterday our lab, Porter, nailed my four month old kitten, Elke, when she got too close to his food bowl while he was eating. She suffered a de-gloving injury that tore the gums and exposed the bone on the roof of her mouth, a couple baby teeth pushed back and a hole that allowed air in her nasal passage to enter her mouth.

She is on two weeks of very restricted activity. I have to give her meds four times a day, being careful to not touch the roof or front of her mouth. Every time I look at her I want to cry and sometimes I do. I'm so afraid she is going to hate me after this because I have to keep forcing things in her hurt mouth. To make things worse this was totally avoidable.

We have talked about the importance of letting the pets eat in peace NUMEROUS TIMES. When I feed them I make sure no one is able to pester anyone who is not finished eating. I thought we were on the same page but apparently we were not.

Yesterday my boyfriend got up early because he had to go into work and he fed the dogs but not the cats. He walked away and little Elke got nailed for getting too close to Porter's bowl. He then tells me he never watches, he just plops the food down and walks away. He said there has never been a problem before so he didn't think there would ever be a problem.

I am so attached to this kitten that seeing her like this is making me crazy. I got her back in October when she was three weeks old. I fostered her and her two siblings for a local shelter and just fell in love with her. She is with me all the time. If I leave the room she follows, she waits outside the bathroom door for me and usually spend the day stalking and playing with me or sleeping around my neck. She even sleeps under the covers with me at night. I'm so happy she wasn't killed, but she could have been. I hope she is able to heal physically and mentally. I would hate for her to be living in fear after this.

I'm just so angry with him. All he had to do was take a couple of minuets to WATCH them and this would not have happened. Every time I look at Elke I feel sick and sad and very angry. Am I completely in the wrong for being so upset?

[Wild Wolf]

You are certainly not wrong in being upset. I would be beyond furious and I would feel terribly guilty. He was being completely irresponsible. He needs to understand that his irresponsibility created the opportunity for that kitten to be injured - as owners of these precious creatures, we are directly responsible for their safety and well-being.

If this dog did this kind of damage to the kitten, they need to be separated. That kitten needs to feel safe and secure. I would keep them in separate areas of the house/apartment, especially while Elke is recovering. You're VERY lucky the dog didn't kill the kitten, next time you may not be so lucky. Do the right thing and keep them separated.

[CMeredith]

This is terrible and I really hope the kitten fully recovers. I wouldn't worry much about the kitten hating you though - animals seem to forget these things and can tell the difference between cruelty and medical care that hurts based on your demeanor (just like babies).

However, I don't think the boyfriend necessarily committed an unforgiveable sin if there never was an issue before. Certainly animals should be allowed to eat in peace but I've had dogs and cats together for years and never had anything like that happen. If the lab has never demonstrated resource guarding before then it's not entirely unreasonable to leave them unsupervised. Now, if the lab is known to guard his food or toys or has snapped at the kitten in the past, then separating them was obviously essential and he should have known that. So your level of anger at him should be based on the complete history involved. After all, nothing is a problem until it is. His level of negligence should be judged by the full history between the animals. I don't agree that he was NECESSARILY "being irresponsible." Animals eating together isn't inherently dangerous.

In my opinion, the lab's resource guarding is the real issue here and I think you guys should address that to avoid this happening again with the kitten, a child or one of you. Animals shouldn't do this and can be trained not to.

I know it feels terrible but animals are resilient and she can fully recover. People make mistakes and as long as your boyfriend has the right attitude about this, he should be forgiven.

Best of luck,
Chris

[ladyfreckles]

When I raise kittens, I always keep them in my bedroom/bathroom until they're large enough to fend for themselves. I fed them in there until they were six months old. Until your kitten recovers you could try keeping him/her quarantined away from the dog to make a healthy recovery. It's terrible that that happened, and more terrible that it happened because of a careless mistake.

[JakodaCD OA]

no your not wrong for being upset Poor kitty, it isn't your fault, she will forgive you, animals don't hold grudges..

Hope your BF learned a good lesson, when my husband does something 'stupid', which is rare, I always tell him, 'someone gets hurt you are paying the vet bill'
Makes him much more aware

Hope kitty has a fast recovery

[KZoppa]

Wow thats seriously sucky!! I doubt the kitten will hate you. They know who feeds them!

I dont blame you for being mad. I would be pretty freaking ticked off too. We have the totem pole in the house set so the dogs KNOW the cats are above them and we've never had a problem personally but we also try to avoid situations that a problem might result.

The kitten may be a little or a lot more cautious around the dog(s) from now on and understandably so, but i dont think she'll be mentally scarred for life.

[chelle]

Right or wrong (I say, wrong), but I've learned to trust no one, specifically my bf, when it comes to anything *important* like feeding. I have three dogs on three different foods, so they're much too interested in what the other one is eating. They have to be separated. If it was him? He'd probably plop down a bowl, not measuring anything and it'd likely be a free for all! NOPE! Therefore, bf doesn't do feeding duties, which I'm sure he likes, but it works out best for the dogs!

Sorry for your kitty. I'm sure kitty won't hold any grudges!

[CMeredith]

Originally Posted by chelle

Right or wrong (I say, wrong), but I've learned to trust no one, specifically my bf, when it comes to anything *important* like feeding. I have three dogs on three different foods, so they're much too interested in what the other one is eating. They have to be separated. If it was him? He'd probably plop down a bowl, not measuring anything and it'd likely be a free for all! NOPE! Therefore, bf doesn't do feeding duties, which I'm sure he likes, but it works out best for the dogs!

Sorry for your kitty. I'm sure kitty won't hold any grudges!

Wow...I'm a little speechless. If you can't trust your boyfriend with such a simple task as feeding, then why is he your boyfriend? Contrary to popular opinion, all us guys aren't clueless sods. Those that are, shouldn't be rewarded for it by being absolved of all responsibility. If your dogs are important to you, then they should be important to him.

In the OP's case, we don't have any indication that he should be lumped into the same category though.

[Lilie]

[QUOTE=
Hope your BF learned a good lesson, when my husband does something 'stupid', which is rare, I always tell him, 'someone gets hurt you are paying the vet bill'
Makes him much more aware

[/QUOTE]

I say the exact thing to my husband. The mistake isn't intentional. It just happens sometimes. Reminding him of costly vet bills helps him focus a little more on what he is doing.

My husband used to pat the horses on the butt when they left their stalls. I warned him and warned him not to do it. My horses NEVER kick. But that doesn't mean that they never will. One day he patted HIS mare on the butt as she left her stall, she nailed him right above the knee. Sent him to the ground. Any lower she would have shattered his knee cap. This time, he just had a nasty bruise. He learned from his mistake. (Of course I had to rub it in, "I TOLD you not to do it. I TOLD you!") Now, when he lets the horses out, he gives them room to leave their stalls.

It is horrible that this happened to your kitty. But it is a valuable lesson learned for your boyfriend. Something he will never forget. Certainly not something that you shouldn't forgive him for.

[Franksmom]

I'm betting your Kitten will still love you just as much as before she maybe afraid of dogs but they may keep her out of trouble too.
I had never had a problem with my dogs and cats till last fall, when 2 of my dogs walked past the couch and my 9 year old cat decided he didn't want them there, the cat jumped on one of the dogs from above clawing and growling, if it had just been one of the dogs things might of been ok but with both dogs being there they both turned on the cat at the same time. I had a full fledge cat/dog fight on my hands I thought I was never going to get them apart. My cat ended up with some trauma to his head and a broken jaw. Which have all healed. He's still the same lovable cat he's always been, just avoids the dogs now.
This cat is one we adopted about 7 years ago he showed up at our house one day, and was known in the neighborhood as the cat that would run off stray dogs, I've seen him move dogs of all sizes out of his path just by walking up to them, and that's what all my dogs had done till that one day.