Ugh, Really?!

[TrickyShepherd]

Ok, so I have to say.. I HATE our roommate (whole other topic!), and I HATE that 3 people, other then myself and Will, have the security code to the house/garage!!!

Here I am sitting down, the house nice and calm, sending out some emails and planning out next week before I start cleaning (it's my day off and the SO is at work, which is when I do all my bills/emails/cleaning and other errands). The next thing I know, Zira goes off like a rabid dog... barking like crazy!! I hear the garage open (which was strange since the horse's rear end that rents a room from us was in his room...) Then the door leading into the garage opens, startled me half to death, and Zira runs at the door barking and then into a deep growl.

Walking in the door is the SO's friend that works on the house and his girlfriend. He was NOT supposed to be over here today. We have NO work for him to do! Thankfully Z didn't do anything, just run up to them and then watch them enter the house... guess she felt that I was no longer startled or worried. So, I told him "Will didn't tell me you were supposed to be over here today.....". He then says... "Oh, *the roommate* wanted to go (insert name of place.. didn't care enough to listen to that), So I am picking him up and she (his girlfriend) is staying here to study."... Great.... just lovely!

OK Here's my problem with all of this.... My car is out front... you KNOW I'm home.... What happened to knocking first? Or how about ringing the door bell? When I am not home and he's working on the house, I don't care that he just walks in as long as he doesn't have anyone over, the work gets done, and he locks up after.... But to just barge in when someone's home and when you are not expected?! Ugh! And my OTHER problem is... I had a LOT to do today! I had to clean, put stuff away, do laundry, and I really want to take Zira out for a long walk since the weather is BEAUTIFUL! All of this had to be done before 4:30pm. We are having a family get together and Will & I (and Z) are leaving once he gets home... so I have to be ready.

Between the useless man that lives here walking in and out of the house all day, and now this... I have yet to be able to do the floors. I am OCD about my floors.... if they are wet and you walk on them, you're in big trouble. The walk is also cancelled because I will NOT leave my house knowing someone I do not know is there alone to free roam our stuff. (First time I met her... what a lovely first meeting, eh?) And I can't really leave the room and do laundry or any other chores either because again, I do not trust anyone, and also I have to watch Z and make sure she isn't being annoying and causing issues.

So here we go again... another day I can't get anything done because of this nonsense. He's been working on the house almost every day this week, and the two days he hasn't, I've been working all night. I finally get a day off and time to get it all done.... and this is what I get. So frustrated!

I can not wait until this house is done with all it's work so he's not over just walking in, and we have no one renting a room. (The SO only let him rent because he was a so called 'friend' that needed help... I despise him with every bone in my body!)

I am now extremely irritated.... one thing after another and I am at boiling point.

Am I overreacting? What would you all do in this situation?

Sorry, needed to vent....

[ladyfreckles]

Roommates can really get to you. We're renting our spare room to a friend because he wanted to move out here but didn't want to commit to an apartment lease. Now he's ready to do that, but he still lives here because we could really use the money. He's probably going to move out later this year.

That said, he was an alright friend. He got on my nerves a bit as friend but I would have never dreamed I'd hate him as much as I do now that he's my roommate. Everything he does irritates me, so I can relate to you being mad. Every little inconsiderate thing just keeps stacking up and driving me crazy. He doesn't respect that my pets are my pets and tries to touch Viking without my permission. He constantly breaks house rules. And since I'm weird and like cleaning when I'm alone the house has been extremely messy since he moved in. He's made friends at work, and they keep inviting him places, but he rejects them to sit around in the house all the time. I NEVER get time to just be myself. I practically beg him to go out and have a social life now.

It's normal, at least to me, to be irritated with a roommate and want them gone. I don't think you're overreacting because I can somewhat relate to your situation. It's good to vent and get it out.

[Liesje]

That would creep me out. I creeps me out how easy it is for me to get in my aunt and uncle's house (HUGE mcmansion out in the woods) because I have the garage code, which happens to be their address. All the places I rented had actual keys, so no one could go in but those who actually had keys, being the people who actually lived there.

[CeCe]

Wow, that sounds annoying. Especially leaving his girlfriend in your house when he isn't there. Sounds like you'll have to talk to your SO about setting rules for these guys.

[amaris]

WAIT....the guy who was working on your house brought his girlfriend over and left her at your house to study? What's wrong with her own place? Or his?

I think that would be what bugs me the most, the code to the garage can be changed fairly easily but that *guy who works on your house* feels at home enough to deposit his girlfriend at your place without permission is what would really set me off.

She doesn't have the right to be in your home if you don't know her from Jane Doe, EVEN if she's your roommate's friend's gf, that still isn't a close enough relationship for her to waltz in and stay on, especially when the guys whom you do know aren't gonna be around.

Yes, can tooootally get why roommates set you off, i've been living in dorms for 3 yrs now and i'm probably gonna need the looney bin soon.

[TrickyShepherd]

Originally Posted by ladyfreckles

Roommates can really get to you. We're renting our spare room to a friend because he wanted to move out here but didn't want to commit to an apartment lease. Now he's ready to do that, but he still lives here because we could really use the money. He's probably going to move out later this year.

That said, he was an alright friend. He got on my nerves a bit as friend but I would have never dreamed I'd hate him as much as I do now that he's my roommate. Everything he does irritates me, so I can relate to you being mad. Every little inconsiderate thing just keeps stacking up and driving me crazy. He doesn't respect that my pets are my pets and tries to touch Viking without my permission. He constantly breaks house rules. And since I'm weird and like cleaning when I'm alone the house has been extremely messy since he moved in. He's made friends at work, and they keep inviting him places, but he rejects them to sit around in the house all the time. I NEVER get time to just be myself. I practically beg him to go out and have a social life now.

It's normal, at least to me, to be irritated with a roommate and want them gone. I don't think you're overreacting because I can somewhat relate to your situation. It's good to vent and get it out.

I am so glad it's not just me! See... I hated this guy long before he moved in. I saw right through him and new what a piece of horse manure he really was. The SO didn't... he has a kind heart and sees the good in those that don't deserve that. When he moved in, he disrespected me when my SO was gone.. and then fine to him when he came home. My SO just thought I was being bitchy, since I hate him so much. Well NOW the SO finally see's what I mean and we are trying to get this rear end out of the house at the end of this month. And I hate that people use this house as their "hang out", "drop off center"... If I wasn't here... the guy who works on the house would have left her here by herself without either of our permissions. THAT right there is what annoyed me the most!!!

Originally Posted by Liesje

That would creep me out. I creeps me out how easy it is for me to get in my aunt and uncle's house (HUGE mcmansion out in the woods) because I have the garage code, which happens to be their address. All the places I rented had actual keys, so no one could go in but those who actually had keys, being the people who actually lived there.

No kidding! Creeps the heck out of me! I am paranoid about people being in my home as it is... my stuff is here, my information, my dog, my life! Plus, the inside door locks are ones that if you lock, you have to use a hanger to get back in. So the doors to the rooms are unlocked. I hate that. We can't use our alarm system anymore because of these two morons.... and we can't lock the garage door leading in the house anymore. I don't feel as safe anymore... and that bothers me. Those garage codes make it far too easy, IMO.

Originally Posted by CeCe

Wow, that sounds annoying. Especially leaving his girlfriend in your house when he isn't there. Sounds like you'll have to talk to your SO about setting rules for these guys.

Yes.... I agree... and I will be sitting him down tonight before we go to the family's house. Because I am not having this anymore. We are already trying to get the piece of trash out of here at the end of this month, so no point bringing that up to him.. he hates him just as much now (thanks him sitting on the hood of my SO's $35k brand new Challenger while smoking in the garage.... I think I saw fire come out of his ears that day). But for the other guy to just come as he pleases and leave someone we don't know here by herself.... that needs to be talked about. Unbelievable. I have no privacy here.

[Dainerra]

I would have told the GF "you don't have to go home, but you can't stay here"
Sorry, my house isn't a free daycare. You don't just drop off people to hangout.
I would be changing the code and friend wouldn't have it anymore. Does roommate have a car that he keeps in the garage? If not, he wouldn't have the code either.

I also wouldn't have the friend over to "work" while you or your SO aren't there to supervise. He seems to have your home confused with his.

Wait, so is it the roommates GF? That is slightly different unless you have rule in his leash about him leaving guests alone at the house. I would make it clear that she isn't going to step foot in any place but the common areas of the house.

[TrickyShepherd]

Originally Posted by amaris

WAIT....the guy who was working on your house brought his girlfriend over and left her at your house to study? What's wrong with her own place? Or his?

I think that would be what bugs me the most, the code to the garage can be changed fairly easily but that *guy who works on your house* feels at home enough to deposit his girlfriend at your place without permission is what would really set me off.

She doesn't have the right to be in your home if you don't know her from Jane Doe, EVEN if she's your roommate's friend's gf, that still isn't a close enough relationship for her to waltz in and stay on, especially when the guys whom you do know aren't gonna be around.

Yes, can tooootally get why roommates set you off, i've been living in dorms for 3 yrs now and i'm probably gonna need the looney bin soon.

I completely agree!!!

And I lived in dorms for years while in college.... I would take that all over again compared to this BS! I thought I was going to need a looney bin after some roommates from **** in college......... Now I'm REALLY going to need the looney bill... and a padded white room!!!

I like my space.... I like knowing I'm home ALONE and safe... and when SO is home, I just want to have HIM here (unless someone is invited over, or wanted over!). I really hate knowing that at ANY moment, someone could be walking into the house. I always have to be on edge... not only for the obvious reasons, but also because they are NOT dog people and are HORRIBLE with Z... they have left the garage open with the door leading outside cracked open too!!!! My dog could have gotten out those times if I didn't notice! I thought I was going to kill someone those occasions!! I ask over and over again for people to close ALL doors, ignore her when they come in so she can settle down.... NO ONE listens!! If anything was to happen to my dog, or anything of mine because of someone other then my SO or I.... I would go crazy on them, that would be the end of their road. Drives me up the dang wall...

[ladyfreckles]

I'll also add, if our roommate ever did what yours has done I'd kick him out instantly. Unacceptable behavior.

[TrickyShepherd]

Originally Posted by Dainerra

I would have told the GF "you don't have to go home, but you can't stay here"
Sorry, my house isn't a free daycare. You don't just drop off people to hangout.
I would be changing the code and friend wouldn't have it anymore. Does roommate have a car that he keeps in the garage? If not, he wouldn't have the code either.

I also wouldn't have the friend over to "work" while you or your SO aren't there to supervise. He seems to have your home confused with his.

Wait, so is it the roommates GF? That is slightly different unless you have rule in his leash about him leaving guests alone at the house. I would make it clear that she isn't going to step foot in any place but the common areas of the house.

Oh I wanted to say that... lucky for them I have a huge headache and didn't feel like blowing up at anyone.

It's the SO's friend's GF. He came over to pick the roommate up to go somewhere. He's got a lot of skill when it comes to working on houses and with entertainment centers and all sorts of handy work, so the SO contracts him out to do projects here. Usually I trust him very much.... he's normally a very nice guy and the SO has known him for a long time. However, today... I am not pleased. I am not sure if it would have been different if I wasn't home... maybe she just would have went with them. But, Still... Knock on the dang door, and ASK me!! Don't just walk in and drop her off like it's a freaking daycare center.

Though, I've been very nice to her, since she's been extremely polite and very good with Z... I don't believe she planned to be here at all, nor did she look like this was what she wanted. I still don't trust anyone though... nothing personal, but If I don't know you... you're not being left alone with my dog and my stuff in our home.

And we've made it very clear already... the roommate is to have NO ONE over in this house.. male or female. He is only here temporarily and has no right to have anyone on this property. Though, I think he broke this once already when I had to stay with family for a few days and Will was up in NJ for his surgery. The house was trashed... the kitchen was gross... and I had to clean everything up, which took about 5 hrs... I left the house spotless. He is the most disrespectful person I have ever met. I just wish my SO listened to me before he said yes to him being her.... I said no, and all my reasons are completely valid and have shown as true. Ugh.... -_-