I don't understand being grossed out by a bitch's heat cycle. (Especially for someone who has recently done diapers and anticipates another round soon...) I don't look forward to it but I am not grossed out by it. That aside -- Now I was happy that mine waited until 15 months for round 1. She was diapered (modified women's cotton bikini underwear with a woman's pad) and did not rip up the diaper. Ever. She's 4+ now. She bleeds the full three months and this cycle threatens to run longer. My issue? False pregnancy that = crabby.
Can you have someone come in mid day to let her out? (Someone very responsible who will take her out on leash and bring her back in). I'd also consider putting down piddle pad or two for her. I cannot tell you if the urination and defecation thing is normal or not. We've skipped that so far. I wonder if maybe she's feeling uncomfortable in her abdomon(SP) & interprets that as a need to defecate?