Zeeva, I hope you can start feeling better soon. Sometimes the best thing to do is to go to your doctor and tell them exactly how you are feeling. They can get you to the right people who can find the best medications for what you are going through. And get you on a good path.
I agree there are chemical inbalances in the brain that can throw us for a loop. If you are female, and or if you have other medical conditions, those inbalances can be caused by our body's cycles and the medical conditions. They can also be affected by outside stuff, like a really negative work environment. They are not necessarily permanent. Trust me that one day you realize that you are having a lot more good days than bad days, and one day you realize you no longer need the medication to have good days.
I've been on about half a dozen types, some longer term than others, I no longer need them.
Jenna, RN CGC & Babs, CD RA CGC HIC
Heidi, RA CGC
SG3 Odessa, SchH1, Kkl1, AD
Ninja, RN CGC & Milla, RN CGC
Joy, Star Puppy, RN CGC
Dolly CGC & Bear CGC